Tag: joe the plumber

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Oh Look, Not-Joe The Not-Plumber Hasn’t Vanished Up His Own A**hole Yet

Remember that "Joe" the "Plumber" guy who was briefly a rightwing hero because, like Chauncey Gardiner, he was a simple man who spoke simple truths (Obama's a SOCIALIST and TAXES WILL CRUSH MY DREAMS)? Turns out that once you...
Alton Nolen, from a prior arrest

Wingnuts Sure Oklahoma Beheading Suspect Proves Jihad Is Here

The wingnuttosphere is very excited about the implications of a terrible crime today at Vaughan Foods, a warehouse and distribution facility in Moore, Oklahoma (disgusting details follow, no way around it): Sgt. Jeremy Lewis says the alleged suspect, 30-year-old Alton...
Sorry, Virginia

Bernie Sanders Says Shut Up, Pat Robertson Calls For Revolution (Again), And Other News You Can Maybe Use

We have good news and bad news. The good news is that it's almost Friday. The bad news is that it's not Friday yet. Here, have some news to make you laugh, cry, or just go back to bed. One...

Joe The Plumber Is Human Garbage, Again

Leading conservative intellectual Joe the Failed Politician Not-Plumber has decided that he has not spewed forth enough frothing filth to remind us all of what a horrible shitpile he is. First, he told the parents of dead kids in...

Joe The Plumber Has Opinion No One Asked Him For And No One Is Interested In Hearing

Of all the dimwitted leaking anal polyps rushing to write nine million words this weekend about Friday night’s terrible murder spree, of all the jabbering imbeciles determined to scream that “Guns don’t kill people!” and “Should we ban knives...

High School Kids Give Holocaust The Respect It Merits: Nazi V. Jews Beer Pong

Some high school children have some Jews very very angry (for a change; lol Jews, right?) with their classy reenactment of the Holocaust, via Beer Pong (above). Note how much harder it would be to get one's ball into...

Derp Roundup: Your Weekly Grab-Bag Of Grotesqueries

Welcome, kids, to Derp Roundup, the weekly feature where we give our browser tabs a Silkwood shower, then inspect the drains for stories that are too stoopid to ignore altogether, but not enough to hang a full blog post...

Deleted Comments Of The Day: Why So Skimmy, Wonkette?

Oh, gosh, kids, have we got a treat for you! Yesterday, we brought you the braindroppings of a Clinton conspiracy lackwit, Robert Morrow, who wants the world to know about the Clinton's secret shame: Chelsea is not Bill's daughter,...

Weep, Ye Mighty, For Fallen Soldier ‘Joe’ The ‘Plumber’

There is not a reason in the world to click on the video above of fallen Wonkette hero "Joe" the "Plumber" flapping his gums at his election loss party, except to note his killer rags. Dude, you were running...

Joe The Plumber II: The Bidening

You will remember 2008, yes? When "Joe the Plumber" seized the nation's imagination and served as the nation's templar for our hopes that there was a secret groundswell of angry anti-Obama voters who would make the race close and...

GOP’s New ‘Joe The Plumber,’ ‘Chris The Baker,’ Just As Tawdry As The Last One

Oh, did the Republicans make someone their new national hero for being rude to a Democrat, in this case our dream lover, Old Handsome Joe Biden? They did? That's so weird, we would never have guessed. You will remember...

That Joe the Plumber Idiot Has A Black Friend Now

Dung-pile peasant turned right-wing avatar Sam Wurzelbacher, who likes to pretend his name is Joe and also likes to pretend he is a plumber, has a black friend! She’s really likes Sam the Unemployable Guy Who Pretended To Be...

Joe The Plumber Has Brilliant Analysis Of What Caused The Holocaust

What caused the Holocaust? (Or per Business Insider, "Why are the sources of anti-Semitism?") Well, you could be boring about it and point to the rich vein of anti-Semitism going back to the Middle Ages in those parts of...

Who Would Win In A Barfight: Joe The Plumber Or Joe The Biden?

Handsome Old Joe Biden explained the other day that being a Bain executive doesn't make you any more special or ready to be president than would being a plumber. Maybe we are wrong (we are not wrong) but it...

Joe The Plumber Explains To Stupid Hippie Why Paying Taxes Is Cool (VIDEO)

Hey stupid Occupy hippie! Why don't you love paying taxes, like "Joe" "the Plumber" does? Taxes are cool, they pay for parks and police! Also, it is your patriotic duty to pay your fair share and not, say, divert...

Joe The Plumber: What Could Obama Possibly Be Doing That Is More Important Than Joe The Plumber?

Joe the Plumber went to the White House, you guys, and he stood outside the gates and couldn't get in. That is no way to treat some random schlub running for Congress from ... let's see ... Ohio! Sad...