Tag Archives: joe scarborough

  Morning Dough

Joe Scarborough Divorce Papers Confirm Joe Scarborough Is A Rich Jerk

Ohey look! Unrepentant sexist bag of douche Joe Scarborough is getting divorced. Awww. Couldn’t happen to a more dickish but VERY occasionally not-dickish guy. Congrats, bro. Cool story: somehow Scarborough is getting away with only paying $30K/month in alimony. Of course, 30 large a month is a problem for the rest of us, but not for Morning Joe because he makes $99,000 per week. PER WEEK. $400K a month. Close to $5 million per…Forgive us if we take a moment to sob uncontrollably in the corner. Read more on Joe Scarborough Divorce Papers Confirm Joe Scarborough Is A Rich Jerk…
  battle of the network stars

Joe Scarborough Says Sean Hannity Is A Racist Vulture Douche

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy Do you watch Morning Joe? We do not watch Morning Joe. Our mom, Commie Mom, watches Morning Joe, for the same reason she listens to Rush Limbaugh: she has dangerously low blood pressure, and without some hypertension SHE WOULD DIE. Read more on Joe Scarborough Says Sean Hannity Is A Racist Vulture Douche…
  cheapskates

Skinflint Obamas Avoid The Taxman By ‘Giving’ All Their Money to ‘Charity’

Skinflint cheapo miser Barack Obama and his dumb “wife” “Michelle” “Obama” are total hypocrites now, as if you did not see that coming, because they only paid 18 percent and change in taxes this year, and they think that just because they gave 25 percent of their income to charity in 2012, that somehow makes it okay. I think we all know the answer to that! Read more on Skinflint Obamas Avoid The Taxman By ‘Giving’ All Their Money to ‘Charity’…
  fuck it we'll do it live!

Retroactively Liveblooging The Paul Krugman-Joe Scarborough Steel Cage Death Match Of Death

It was a Meltdown in Metropolis, a Rumble in the Concrete Jungle on Monday night when Charlie Rose hosted Paul Krugman and Joe Scarborough for a battle royale for the crown of World’s Greatest Economics Expert Guy! Who would win? Would it be the avuncular and learned Dr. Krugman, an Ivy League professor who holds an actual Nobel Prize for Economics, or would it be the failed Congressman from America’s Dingus who most people know these days as “that guy on morning TV whose facial expression makes him look like nothing so much as an angry pit bull that was just neutered”? Your Wonket could not watch this death match live last night, so we will retroactively live-bloog it this afternoon because we woke up feeling dangerously optimistic about the world. Read more on Retroactively Liveblooging The Paul Krugman-Joe Scarborough Steel Cage Death Match Of Death…
  good guys and bad guys with guns

Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal

We have already read about what made Los Angeles spree-killin’ cop Christopher Dorner go Django on the entire LAPD (and their families). It was LAPD racisms. So we know who (and what) he hates. But who does he love? Just about all your typical libtards, like Hillary Clinton and Larry David and Ellen Degeneres and Anderson Cooper and Joe Scarborough and Chris Christie and Jon Huntsman. What? After the jump, some extensive selections from his manifesto (this one uncensored), which we had kind of stopped reading after we got through the racisms parts, where he espouses best wishes for women in the military, Hillary (or Christie!) 2016, and burning hell for the Westboro Baptist Church and the NRA’s Wayne LaPierre, because nobody (including himself) needs the kind of fucking arsenal with which he is currently terrorizing the country’s second biggest metropolis, and where your Editrix is currently never leaving her apartment again. Read more on Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal…
  cool scoop bro

FishbowlDC Manages Not To Libel Anyone In Story On Color Of Joe Scarborough’s Sweater

What is hip and happening, FishbowlDC? Any good “DC gossip” you might want to impart? Could you do that without libeling anyone? OK good, just checking! Today, Fishbowl has TWO major scoops on its hands. One is an expose, by guy-getting-sued-for-libel Peter Ogburn, and it is an expose of Jonathan Martin from Politico who is obviously a fucking idiot because he uses the numeral “4” in place of “four,” on Twitter, because if he didn’t his tweets wouldn’t fit. The other is by Eddie Scarry, and it is about Joe Scarborough’s red sweater. Let us read, with wonder and awe, FishbowlDC’s journalism! Read more on FishbowlDC Manages Not To Libel Anyone In Story On Color Of Joe Scarborough’s Sweater…
  the sky is falling

Paul Krugman Brings Facts To Ideology Fight

OK, the bad news is that so in order to watch Paul Krugman, you have to first endure Paul Ryan (R-Pissant) and his smarmy little mug, but don’t worry, the good news is he goes away pretty quickly! But then — and this is more bad news — he is replaced by another idiot (Morning Joe) and Ed Rendell, who we have come not to like so much now that he is chairing the corporate-sponsored “Fix the Debt” campaign. So anyway the video begins with Joe and whatshername asking Paul Krugman what the hell is going on in Spain. No, not as in “why is there 50% youth unemployment” but as in, “why are they buying your book over in Spain and also in Japan?” Important questions indeed. Read more on Paul Krugman Brings Facts To Ideology Fight…
  Odds And Ends...Of America!

A Children’s Treasury Of Inauguration-Day Stupids

So we hear that there was some sort of widely-watched event today that did not involve sports! Above, we have Tweetosphere messages from three people who seem not to understand that everyone can see them saying stuff, and that retweets can be directed to @SecretService (as all of these were, for whatever good it does). Or maybe we could talk about the professional trolls at Fox & Friends, who discovered that today, the third Monday in January, is thought by some to be “the most depressing day of the year,” a story that we are certain has absolutely nothing to do with it also being Barack Obama’s second Inaugural. Really, they don’t say there’s a connection! It is too a legitimate news story, so they brought on a motivational speaker to help Fox viewers cheer the fuck up: Read more on A Children’s Treasury Of Inauguration-Day Stupids…
  don't retreat reload

NRA: Why Does Uppity Obama Refuse To Let Sasha And Malia Die From Guns Like Regular American Children?

Here is the latest super smart and with-it ad from the NRA, who are obviously geniuses of social intelligence. We are fairly shocked that in their jeremiad against the president’s having Secret Service protection for his daughters, they did not actually feature pictures of said daughters, and, say, “surveyor’s marks.” (Watch closely for a cameo by David Gregory as a member of the uppity blah ‘lite.) But what do other people think of this dumb fucking thing? Read more on NRA: Why Does Uppity Obama Refuse To Let Sasha And Malia Die From Guns Like Regular American Children?…
  people who call people chauvinists are the real chauvinists

Joe Scarborough Yells Over All The Ladies, Snaps His Fingers At Them, To Prove That He Is Not A Chauvinist

Joe Scarborough is trying to do the right thing. He is trying to get Barack Obama to hire more women. That is good! GOOD FOR YOU JOE SCARBOROUGH. (It is also somewhat akin to the Republican mouthpieces foaming that Chuck Hagel is too mean to gays, but baby steps.) Unfortunately, then Mika calls him a chauvinist, and he tries to make the point about how not-chauvinist he is by yelling over all the women, and snapping his fingers in their faces. This is … problematic. Read more on Joe Scarborough Yells Over All The Ladies, Snaps His Fingers At Them, To Prove That He Is Not A Chauvinist…
  class traitors

Millionaire Joe Scarborough Class Wars ‘Rich People’

Wonketteers, did you know that the country is full of rich people with mansions and jets? And that these people are far richer than most Americans are or ever will be? Joe Scarborough knows a little something about wealth inequality — not because HE’s wealthy, but because he’s seen OTHER PEOPLE hoard vast quantities of wealth, and thinks — get this — it’s morally wrong. Spokesmodel Mika Brzezinski gets the ball rolling, asking something about “tax rates today, those who are impacting taxes [sic] are contrived in some way.” Was that a question? Apparently it was, because Morning Joe, wearing his most Serious looking spectacles this morning, explains why these concerns are NOT contrived. It is because in the ’90s, lowering taxes on capital gains was probably the “right” thing to do to stimulate growth, but now, it’s looking like it was NOT probably the right thing to do. Joe Scarborough doesn’t know anything about income inequality PERSONALLY, of course, since he lives such a humble existence on his $4 million per year salary. Read more on Millionaire Joe Scarborough Class Wars ‘Rich People’…
  cool apology bro

Suck It, Nate Silver! Joe Scarborough Apologizes For Nothing

Joe Scarborough, who hosts MSNBC’s morning show because the rest of MSNBC’s Obama food stamp-loving libtard talent don’t wake from their welfare-funded fortified wine benders until well after noon, is really, really sorry he conflated Nate Silver with that unwashed hillbilly “unskewed polls” guy. And by really, really sorry, we mean he’s not sorry at all. While most of the world has moved past the 2012 election to focus on more important things, like Ken Layne’s fun cooking blog for moms and the possible 2016 presidential candidates, Scarborough remains upset that people are so mean to him just because Nate Silver was right all along. Read more on Suck It, Nate Silver! Joe Scarborough Apologizes For Nothing…
  open the pod bay door hal

Looks Like Tagg Romney Has Already Leaked Next Week’s ‘Election’ ‘Results’

It is time, once again, to PANIC! As you can see above, Unskewed Polls has released a new chart that at first blush doesn’t seem to have any basis in reality. So why would they post such a hilarious result? Well, you have not been keeping up with Your Wonkette. Let’s rectify that now! It is so that when they steal the election, they can point to this “polling” and say the results were in line, duh. As Doktor Zoom explainered with an assist from Harper’s, the GOPpies are ready and able to steal every precinct that doesn’t count paper ballots by hand. As Your Editrix explained a week or whatever ago, one of only six voting machine vendors is owned by former Bain employees. (The others, per Dok’s Harper’s article, are pretty much all owned by the Koch Brothers and run by actual felons, except for the ones that are owned by Tagg Romney.) And as some former NSA analyst explained (but we didn’t post on it, because “depressed”), the way they steal your votes is by siphoning them from the largest precincts. Oh yes, and as The Grio explained this week also too, they are already disappearing early votes from the totals in heavily African-American and Democratic Broward County precincts. But that one, first described as a “computer glitch,” was totally just a woman who couldn’t do numbers good and stuff. Read more on Looks Like Tagg Romney Has Already Leaked Next Week’s ‘Election’ ‘Results’…
  they have always been at war with george zimmerman

Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller Begins To Stuff Its Trayvon Coverage Into The Memory Hole

There’s no way of knowing whether it was Joe Scarborough’s public shaming of them (it was Joe Scarborough’s public shaming of them) but Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller has not only gone almost a whole day without smearing Trayvon Martin’s character or calling just about all black people “professional race baiters,” it’s also begun the painful and arduous task of walking back its horrifying coverage. Their latest story bears what must have been a galling headline to write: New Details Darken Outlook for Zimmerman’s Claim of Self-Defense. It is underneath a gigantic piece alleging some sort of ill-defined venality by Sen. Carl Levin for wanting to install electric car chargers at the Capitol. Obviously, you wouldn’t want a proper walk-back above the fold. Read more on Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller Begins To Stuff Its Trayvon Coverage Into The Memory Hole…
  when you've lost joe you've lost america

Joe Scarborough Discovers ‘Disgusting’ Daily Caller Racism, Is Surprised (VIDEO)

We wonder who Joe Scarborough is talking about here, when he calls out rightwing websites for being “beneath contempt” in their treatment of Trayvon Martin! (No we don’t. He is talking about Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller.) Noting that the Daily Caller had breathlessly presented Trayvon Martin’s Twitter feed as fodder for the poor oppressed whites of the world to note what a bad bad boy Trayvon Martin was, Scarborough practically throws up at the disingenuousness of presenting something so “innocuous … I can show you a lot of white kids, from suburban neighborhoods … come on.” Then he goes on and on and on about some on the right (Tucker Carlson) being “disgusting, warped, twisted and distorted.” Transcript and video of Joe Scarborough calling out Tucker Carlson for hurting America, after the jump. Read more on Joe Scarborough Discovers ‘Disgusting’ Daily Caller Racism, Is Surprised (VIDEO)…