Connecticut’s gearing up for the most important election ever in 2012! “VERNON - A man dressed as a ninja waving nunchucks on a street corner this morning was arrested and charged with breach of peace, police said. Police said they received numerous emergency calls about the man, who was standing on the corner of Route 83 and Regan Road at about 11 a.m. Police said Garland Eastman, 30, of 335 Center Road, was yelling about wanting to beat up U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman, among other diatribes, but he became polite and cooperative after officers started pulling out their bean bags and taser guns.” Eastman/Santelli ‘12. Remember that time Barack Obama beat the shit out of Joe Lieberman on the Senate floor? That was great. [Hartford Courtant via Gothamist]

Joe Lieberman, the actual human equivalent of a chain letter forwarded to you by your grandparents, has a very important tuff-guy job as chair of the Homeland Security Committee. And he’ll tell ya, he does not like Obama’s coterie of czars, not one bit. He’ll probably hold some trenchant as shit hearings about the hated czars, or maybe draft some heroic legislation that forbids the President from appointing policy experts. Russ Feingold is down for whatever, so he’s in too! And don’t think he won’t look up “czar” in the dictionary, because he WILL and he HAS. MORE »

Do you ever read a news headline and actually say, “Ha. Oh fuck,” aloud? WELL, “Lieberman Finally Used That Nazi/Afghanistan Analogy Everyone Could Tell Was Up His Sleeve” and its variations had that effect on your Wonkette Morning Editor! See, it makes negative zero sense to compare the situation to the Vietnam, Lieberman says, because America went into Vietnam out of its own volition. And America didn’t start the Afghanistan War—Christ no—9/11 started the Afghanistan War. In the same way that the Nazis started WWII! So, what, are we just supposed to let 9/11 and the Nazis win a world war?? MORE »

Likely secret dungeon owner Joe Lieberman will do absolutely anything to fuck something up for someone else. Like some creepy jowly robot who runs purely off spite, he has been running around DC demanding that it’s important that Obama’s climate change bill include a NUCLEAR OPTION. If Obama wants everyone to drive cars that are powered by pouring wine on some copies of Sunday Styles and then lighting them on fire, he is going to need to make this up to the Republicans by giving them enough money to buy some seriously cool shit for nuclear and coal power plants. This is because many people who like the bill actually hate polluting the planet! This is what the demons call Fair, in Hell. MORE »

• Why is Matt Yglesias such a self-loathing Jew? [Matt Yglesias]
• “Here was this guy Michael Savage screaming and ranting and raving about illegal immigration Islamofascism and you know it all started to click and make sense.” The End. [Think Progress]
• We love Erick Erickson and his enchanting stories about how Jesus denied illegal immigrant lepers health care. But what’s this, Erick? Five links, accompanied by five little commentaries? Fishy! What should RedState call their Rumors on the Internets? Our vote: “Reagan’s Daily Bidding.” [RedState]
• Joe Lieberman. Technically, not a Republican. And not a Democrat, either. But how can he call himself an Independent if he is still breastfed by Harry Reid and John Boehner (they alternate teets)? We will compromise and call him a Poopoocrat. [TPM]
• Barack Obama and Bill Clinton went on their first big date, and shared an apple pie milkshake and talked about health care reform, blowjobs, and other White House pastimes. [The Caucus]

Gay-for-each-other fecal demons Joe Lieberman and Lindsey Graham are being suuuuuuchhh baaaaabieeesss now that the few decent law-abiding and moral Democrats in the House have promised not to approve any spending bill that would send the sneaky Lieberman-Graham Amendment to the White House, which of course loves it. If you haven’t been following, the “Detainee Photographic Records Protection Act of 2009″ amendment allows the president to legally ignore any court-mandated Freedom of Information Act release of “any photograph that was taken between September 11, 2001 and January 22, 2009 relating to the treatment of individuals engaged, captured, or detained after September 11, 2001, by the Armed Forces of the United States in operations outside of the United States.” NO BUT REALLY. And now Lindsey Graham and Joe Lieberman are threatening to shut the Senate down until this comically fascistic fart-nugget of an amendment saves America. MORE »

• Lindsey Graham doesn’t want you to see those photos from Joe Lieberman’s surprise Abu Ghraib birthday party, especially the one where Joe forces a prisoner to give him a special birthday enema, because then the anus of every American soldier would be in grave danger. [HuffPost]
• Newt Gingrich is making up all sorts of silly names for Sonia-Maria, like “Racialist” and “Whinoceros,” since the teacher won’t let him call her a Mexican anymore. [Think Progress]
• The Wall Street Journal thinks Hank Paulson is “a national hero” and should be rewarded with an endless cornucopia of “Veuve Clicquot and upscale prostitutes.” This angers Matt Taibbi very much, which is why he twittered an angry letter to the editor reminding everyone that Hank Paulson basically invented expensive champagne and hookers and he doesn’t need more of either, thank you. [Matt Taibbi]
• After the Government buys Health Care, Barack Obama will tally up all the abortions you ever had and then will call you on his BlackBerry to offer his congratulations, if you’re in the top ten. [RedState]
• Michelle Malkin cordially invites you to open up MS Paint and doodle funny things about Obamacare! Those who do not partake will be considered pinkos and will likely face investigation by the Committee of Un-American Activities. [Michelle Malkin]

Here is a Hot Scoop via our nation’s secret spy network, CSPAN: one of the main guys from John McCain’s VP vetting committee spilled salacious details on how and why Joe Lieberman did not get to be John McCain’s Sarah Palin. MORE »

Once upon a time, Joe Lieberman nearly ruined Barack Obama’s career forever by going to the Republican National Convention and calling him a “young man” repeatedly while Obama was busy trying to win a campaign against an ancient War God and his evil, fecund snow mistress. Obama prevailed, of course, but since then everybody has hated Joe Lieberman’s guts even more than they used to. MORE »

Now that it’s officially pre-2009, we can start guiltlessly recycling all the material we’ve already written into Top Ten Posts. Today’s took a surprisingly long time to compile. It seemed like a good idea to look at all the funny terms we used to describe our Political Enemies, and it turns out that phrases like “rancid shit-sack,” “vulgar fraud,” “human garbage,” and “cretin” turn up with shocking frequency around these parts. So, after the jump, a painstakingly culled collection of our favorite mean phrases we used to describe objectionable people such as Joe the Plumber, Eliot Spitzer, and of course our all-time favorite, the humanoid sewer-pipe and self-professed eternal virgin Joe Lieberman. MORE »

Vinegar Joe Lieberman is the first actual clump of feces to serve in the U.S. Senate, but it seems Connecticut voters are no longer charmed by this historical oddity. Lieberman now boasts the “highest disapproval rating in any Quinnipiac University poll in any state for a sitting U.S. senator — except for New Jersey’s Robert Torricelli, just before he resigned in 2002.” MORE »