joe biden
Joe Biden: Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangster
What’s Joey B. been talkin’ since singlehandedly saving the country or something (we don’t know, the Kossacks seem pretty ready to murder)? Here is Joe Biden over the past 16 or so hours: What’d you tell the Senate Dems? “This is Joe Biden. I’m your buddy.” What’s gonna happen with the House? “I think we’re [...]
The Year In Joe Biden
We at Wonket — the last bastion of pure Joe Biden love — received the following note yesterday, in our tipline, where people go to yell at us: I know you-all play it as though Joe Biden is just a sexy fool, but the scuttlebutt is that the Rs felt Obama wasn’t serious about talks [...]
All Your Christmas Shopping In One Place, Unless You Have To Buy Stuff For Your Stupid Kids
You will have to go elsewhere for your creepy Elmo dolls (in fact, you probably want to just click that Amazon box in the righthand sidebar so that when Amazon forces your local mom and pop store out of business, at least your local mom and pop website gets a cut). We we do not [...]
Sad Slob Mitt Romney Just Deliberately Messing With Our Heads Now
Hey, remember that Mitt Romney guy? Yeah, us neither, really, but apparently he was expecting to be president, since it was his birthright or something? And now, he’s just wandering around in a sad daze, with only his hundreds of millions of dollars for company. Poor dude. So like any US American who’s feeling a [...]
Daily Caller: Why Does Old Handsome Joe Biden Love Child Rapists?
Well well well! It looks like Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller will be okay even in the face of star cub reporter Matthew Boyle leaving the DC’s black-thug beat for Breitbart! In fact, they are so okay that this will probably be All Daily Caller Day, because fuck if they aren’t a pile of good time [...]
Stupid Old Joe Biden Takes Thanksgiving Vacation, Is Stupid
Dumb Joe Biden, what have you done now!!! Keith Koffler, of White House Dossier, is here to tell us in the excellent journalistic scoop “’Middle Class Joe’ Takes Thanksgiving on Nantucket.” Vice President Biden, who thinks of himself as middle class and self-identifies with average Americans, embarked Tuesday for the exclusive resort island of Nantucket, [...]
Here Is Joe Biden Standing In Line Like A Boss
See that old gray haired man with his back to us, the one who looks really old (and probably handsome, we are just guessing)? That is Joe Biden. We can tell it is Joe Biden because standing next to him is his hot piece of a wife, Dr. Jill. Do you see what they are [...]
Mean Jerk Joe Biden Didn’t Send Aide A Thank-You Note Until He Asked, And Other Halloween Tales Of Horror
Sorry, old ladies, but Old Handsome Joe Biden may be old and he may be handsome, but he is NOT the world’s greatest lover of all humanity (especially old ladies) that you think he is! Once, he didn’t even send one of his aides, this swell fellow Jeff Connaughton, a thank-you note for fundraising for [...]
Joe The Plumber II: The Bidening
You will remember 2008, yes? When “Joe the Plumber” seized the nation’s imagination and served as the nation’s templar for our hopes that there was a secret groundswell of angry anti-Obama voters who would make the race close and give reporters something exciting to cover on Election Night? And then how none of that happened [...]
Internet Wants To Buy Old Handsome Joe Biden A Trans Am For Teh Lulz, Charity
You know that one Onion story that’s nearly mandatory in any discussion of the general awesomeness of Old Handsome Joe Biden, right? (Frankly, we doubt we even needed to link to it, but it’s a habit by now.) You probably also know that Biden knows about the meme, and thinks it’s “hilarious,” right? You might [...]
Fox News ‘Doctor’ Just Asking If Joe Biden Has Dementia, That’s All
This is a video of a Fox “News” “Medical” correspondent visiting Fox and Friends to argue that Joe Biden is either a drunk, obnoxious asshole OR a senile, drunk old man with dementia. Apparently these are the only explanations for interrupting someone that isn’t Jim Lehrer—being an obnoxious asshole, or having dementia.
A Children’s Treasury of Butthurt Reactions To Joe Biden’s Debate Demeanor
Say, did you notice that Joe Biden was just a little interrupty in the VP Debate? We are given to understand that Old Handsome Joe’s performance made a bit of a stir among some of the more sensitive souls on the right side of the political spectrum. (You see, when a Republican puts on an [...]
Vice-Presidential Debate Live-Bloog: Paul ‘The Kid’ Ryan Takes On Old Handsome Joe
What’s this, Sara Benincasa is joining us tonight, in our domicile? Does she have hair to braid? We will soon find out! In the meantime, here is the first and last nice thing we will most likely say about Paul Ryan tonight: Paul Ryan sends copies of NOBUMMER’s birth certificate to any constituent who writes [...]
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