Wednesday, October 10th, 2007
Jimmy Carter says we should not attack Iran. [CBS News]
Jimmy Carter says we should not attack Iran. [CBS News]
Wednesday, October 10th, 2007
Sinatra’s Ex-Wife Rails Against Kindly Old Ex-President
Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007
Jimmy Carter apparently traveled to Sudan recently to meet with President Omar Hassan al-Bashir (isn’t he too old to be traveling so far? Do they have McDonald’s there?) and ask him to please stop killing so many people in Darfur. He went with Nelson Mandela and some other “elder statesmen” and made al-Bashir sign a pledge or something and gave them $300 million to clean everything up. And now Mia Farrow is pissed!
Jimmy Carter apparently traveled to Sudan recently to meet with President Omar Hassan al-Bashir (isn’t he too old to be traveling so far? Do they have McDonald’s there?) and ask him to please stop killing so many people in Darfur. He went with Nelson Mandela and some other “elder statesmen” and made al-Bashir sign a pledge or something and gave them $300 million to clean everything up. And now Mia Farrow is pissed!
Carter Embarks on Fast Food Tour of the South
Tuesday, July 31st, 2007
Former President Jimmy Carter, having apparently succumbed to senility, is now wondering around southwest Virginia going to McDonald’s. Last Thursday, he went to the Hillsville franchise for a quick lunch with his wife Rosalynn — he ordered a salad, a sundae, and coffee. Yesterday afternoon, he went to the McDonald’s at the Lakeside Plaza in Salem, once again with the former First Lady and several mystified Secret Service agents.
If you see Carter at your McDonald’s franchise, you are urged to notify the authorities.
This time, it’s Salem: Jimmy Carter stops at another local McDonald’s [WDBJ]
Former President Jimmy Carter, having apparently succumbed to senility, is now wondering around southwest Virginia going to McDonald’s. Last Thursday, he went to the Hillsville franchise for a quick lunch with his wife Rosalynn — he ordered a salad, a sundae, and coffee. Yesterday afternoon, he went to the McDonald’s at the Lakeside Plaza in Salem, once again with the former First Lady and several mystified Secret Service agents.
If you see Carter at your McDonald’s franchise, you are urged to notify the authorities.
This time, it’s Salem: Jimmy Carter stops at another local McDonald’s [WDBJ]
Kindly Old VP Wishes He, Too, Had Been Evil Despot
Monday, July 30th, 2007
Back in the late ’70s, two kindly yet inept gentlemen were elected as president and vice president, simply because their names weren’t Nixon, Agnew or Ford. One of those men, former VP and failed 1984 Dem presidential nominee Walter Mondale, now wants you to know that Dick Cheney isn’t the only super-powerful Dr. Evil in recent presidential history. Turns out Walter Mondale kicked a lot of ass back in the day, but he did it with the utmost gentility and old-fashioned midwest manners. MORE »
Back in the late ’70s, two kindly yet inept gentlemen were elected as president and vice president, simply because their names weren’t Nixon, Agnew or Ford. One of those men, former VP and failed 1984 Dem presidential nominee Walter Mondale, now wants you to know that Dick Cheney isn’t the only super-powerful Dr. Evil in recent presidential history. Turns out Walter Mondale kicked a lot of ass back in the day, but he did it with the utmost gentility and old-fashioned midwest manners. MORE »
Bush Finally Hated More Than Carter
Thursday, June 21st, 2007
It has taken nearly two terms to achieve what many considered impossible, but today George W. Bush has approval ratings lower than the all-time lows of Jimmy Carter. MORE »
It has taken nearly two terms to achieve what many considered impossible, but today George W. Bush has approval ratings lower than the all-time lows of Jimmy Carter. MORE »
Old Friends Talk About How Much Dubya Sucks Thursday, May 31st, 2007
You’ve Been Ravaging Global Stability In My Mind All Day
Friday, May 25th, 2007
Jimmy Carter is serenaded by drunks, Dick Cheney carefully selects which books will be burned in his knowledge destroying ceremony, and Paul Wolfowitz has a hotter, younger girlfriend to take long walks and talk about pillaging the world with.
Jimmy Carter is serenaded by drunks, Dick Cheney carefully selects which books will be burned in his knowledge destroying ceremony, and Paul Wolfowitz has a hotter, younger girlfriend to take long walks and talk about pillaging the world with.
Jimmy Carter is Mean
Tuesday, May 22nd, 2007
Former presidents rarely talk shit about their successors, according to the New York Times, except for when they do, which is kind of often. This is why it was such a shock to hear Jimmy Carter accurately point out how terrible and stupid this current administration is. MORE »
Former presidents rarely talk shit about their successors, according to the New York Times, except for when they do, which is kind of often. This is why it was such a shock to hear Jimmy Carter accurately point out how terrible and stupid this current administration is. MORE »
Gossip Roundup: Damien Cheney
Thursday, April 5th, 2007
* Reliable Source: Edwards campaign forcing candidates children to skip school, perform like trained seals throughout Iowa… It’s a boy for Mary Cheney! … Uh… something about ducks? [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Jimmy Carter: No opinion on “low-rider” pants. Though he secretly thinks they’re Israel’s fault… Rep. Yvette Clarke only member of NY delegation not to endorse Hillary. [Examiner]
* The Sleuth: The Sam Fox recess appointment might be illegal or something. [WP]
* Reliable Source: Edwards campaign forcing candidates children to skip school, perform like trained seals throughout Iowa… It’s a boy for Mary Cheney! … Uh… something about ducks? [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Jimmy Carter: No opinion on “low-rider” pants. Though he secretly thinks they’re Israel’s fault… Rep. Yvette Clarke only member of NY delegation not to endorse Hillary. [Examiner]
* The Sleuth: The Sam Fox recess appointment might be illegal or something. [WP]
Gossip Roundup: Wolf Blitzer Makes Ultimate Sacrifice
Tuesday, March 20th, 2007
* Heard on the Hill: Dick Durbin beat a rat to death with a golf club, bragged about his bloodthirstiness … Rep. Diane Watson kills by night, or possibly by day. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Eleanor Holmes Norton, Stephen Colbert to meet in televised rematch. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Bob Edwards says he hears Al Gore is losing weight … Tom DeLay still pretty much seems like an asshole. [Examiner]
* Shenanigans: Wolf Blitzer forced to drive himself to work. [Politico]
* The Sleuth: Mitt Romney’s got real purty hair. [WP]
* Page Six: Bill Clinton, possibly eating a cheeseburger, will greet guests to Hillary’s fundraising spin aerobics class. [NYP]
* Rush & Molloy: Bored activists drag Amazon.com user-written reviews into Israel-Palestine-Jimmmy Carter brouhaha. [NYDN]
* Heard on the Hill: Dick Durbin beat a rat to death with a golf club, bragged about his bloodthirstiness … Rep. Diane Watson kills by night, or possibly by day. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Eleanor Holmes Norton, Stephen Colbert to meet in televised rematch. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Bob Edwards says he hears Al Gore is losing weight … Tom DeLay still pretty much seems like an asshole. [Examiner]
* Shenanigans: Wolf Blitzer forced to drive himself to work. [Politico]
* The Sleuth: Mitt Romney’s got real purty hair. [WP]
* Page Six: Bill Clinton, possibly eating a cheeseburger, will greet guests to Hillary’s fundraising spin aerobics class. [NYP]
* Rush & Molloy: Bored activists drag Amazon.com user-written reviews into Israel-Palestine-Jimmmy Carter brouhaha. [NYDN]