HAS ANYONE SEEN JIM NEWELL? Wonkette’s Capitol Hill Typing Demon was supposed to go to a dozen or more Media/Nobama parties over this White House Correspondents Dinner weekend, but we haven’t heard from him since Friday. Was he raped or killed or sent to Fox News or something?

Why, who’s that dashing young gent sitting up in a tree? Dr. Hunter Holmes McGuire, of course, the famous Civil War surgeon. Also spotted in Richmond: for the first time ever, somebody actually recognized your editors in public. We were leaving Amici and this perfectly nice-seeming, non-degenerate couple walked by and said, “Hey are you Sara Smith? … AND ARE YOU JIM NEWELL?” and goodness, what a thrill. Wonkette readers, apparently, though you wouldn’t know by looking at them. They had teeth and everything! So we killed them, to keep our location a secret. Oh, and Richmond Times-Dispatch columnist Jeff Schapiro was allegedly seen at the Amici bar, but probably just by somebody who wanted to get him in trouble.

Capitol Hill typing demon Jim Newell has won an Important Honor! He probably thanks you for your support, in his way. [Washington City Paper]

MORE CONTESTS! Here, go vote for “local blogger” Jim Newell and “local yoga celebrity” Liz Glover in this popularity contest run by Atlanta’s “Creative Loafing” freebie. So fun, to click things! We are on the road to Recovery. [CityPaper]

NOTED: “Jim Newell’s deconstruction of WSJ Reaganite-apostate Peggy Noonan’s inauguration column is even more unkind — perhaps even unfair. I really don’t see why he chose those three sentences to bf and annotate, for instance. Nevertheless, what a deft little Hatchett Job.” [Robert Christgau]

• IT’S YOUR JIM NEWELL Q&A: “Transexual? Transsexual? We use this word frequently on Wonkette, but God knows how it’s spelled.” [Fishbowl DC]

WEEKETTE: Do not forsake your Weekette, which is a wonderful weekly collection of your Wonkette items, in the LA CITYBEAT newspaper. Also, oh lord, what is your editor doing now? [LA CITYBEAT]

What dark human vice was engaged herein, June 12, 2008, among Wonketteers and thine ilk? MORE »

It’s now well after 1 p.m. and we haven’t heard anything from editor Jim Newell, so we have to assume he’s either in jail or rigorously pursuing his vow to “fuck 50 paultards” in the woods somewhere, or maybe in the reflecting pool. All we have are some drunken comments from the Wonkette operatives who bravely showed up at 9:30 a.m. to get drunk and make fun of the Ron Paul March of Liberty Upon Washington, the Scarlet Whore Snake City. MORE »

How much fun was had in Washington on Saturday? This much. Two more horrific examples of why John McCain will be president, after the jump. MORE »

WONKETTE ON CNN, THIS AFTERNOON Your Wonkette editor Jim Newell will be on CNN at 1 p.m. Eastern, today at some point, talking about … Barbara Walters having a sex affair with a Republican senator in the 1970s!