Tag Archives: jim gibbons

  brother of that home alone kid is running for gov?

Rory Reid No Longer Related To Harry Reid

Rory Reid, the Nevada Democrat who is trying to succeed Jim Gibbons as Governor of Good Decisions, has launched his first campaign ad, and it somehow fails to mention his last name, which is strange, considering it is also the name of Nevada’s longtime senior senator, Harry Reid. Why in the world would Rory Reid forget to include his surname in his campaign ad? Isn’t that kind of important? Wouldn’t he also want to remind Nevadans of his father’s legacy? Read more on Rory Reid No Longer Related To Harry Reid…
  fond farewells

America’s Worst Governor, Drunken Idiot Jim Gibbons, Can’t Wait To Celebrate His Loss!

Leering imbecile and national embarrassment Jim Gibbons has certainly made his mark on Nevada — what with the bungled rape attempts and death threats and public divorce war with his hilarious wife and the Mexican slaves hidden in his basement and his inept corruption and basically not showing up to work for his entire term — but now the bloated idiot and mean-spirited mouth-breathing turd is facing a primary he can’t even be bothered to pretend to want to win. Read more on America’s Worst Governor, Drunken Idiot Jim Gibbons, Can’t Wait To Celebrate His Loss!…
  drunky mcrape-attempt

Jim Gibbons, America’s Worst Governor, Will Lose His Primary

Does anyone outside of Nevada remember America’s Worst Governor, drunken idiot slimeball waitress-assaulting Jim Gibbons, a red-faced beady-eyed turd so stupid and crooked that even Nevada’s Republicans have spent the past three rotten years mocking and attacking his incompetent, missing-in-action term as governor? Read more on Jim Gibbons, America’s Worst Governor, Will Lose His Primary…
  america's most celibate governor

Jim Gibbons Has Lived Sexless Life For 15 Years

Oh look it’s some gross news about the gross governor of Nevada, one Jim Gibbons, who once disgusted his state of hookers and gambling addicts by assaulting a waitress! According to a legal deposition, Jim Gibbons has not gotten laid by a lady since nineteen hundred and ninety-five. Read more on Jim Gibbons Has Lived Sexless Life For 15 Years…
  america's worst most single governor

GIBBONS MARRIAGE OFFICIALLY OVER: Philandering Nevada governor and alcoholic sex crook Jim Gibbons is a single man as of two days ago. His campaign manager congratulated the governor on taking the “high-road position” in the divorce proceedings and said “the governor has been very respectful of Dawn.” (The governor’s attorney once compared her to an “enraged ferret.”) Dawn Gibbons walks away with a quarter of Jim’s salary for the next five years, plus $275,000 for a 40-acre ranch they own in rural Nevada. Truly, she is Jenny Sanford times 50 plus Las Vegas. Read more on …
  don't take mah guns

John Ensign Is a Sad Sheep of Sorrow

A group of important politicians, including Senators Harry Reid and John Ensign and also the beloved waitress-assaulting alcoholic buffoon Governor Jim Gibbons, gathered ’round uncomfortably to dedicate a new 2900-acre shooting park in Clark County, Nevada yesterday. Ensign reportedly “gazed into his lap, fiddling with his wedding band, turning it this way and that, slipping it off and putting it on different fingers.” What a douche! Read more on John Ensign Is a Sad Sheep of Sorrow…
  america's worst governor

REMEMBER DRUNKY McRAPEY? Jim Gibbons is this incredibly dull/stupid cretin-crook Republican congressman who somehow became governor of Nevada, in the middle of some awful cheap sex-assault scandal. Now his wife has finally left him, the Feds are investigating all his crookedness, people are noticing that he hasn’t actually shown up to work this year, and the Vegas cocktail waitress he (allegedly) threatened to rape and murder has just filed a federal lawsuit against him, for being a scumbag. [Reno and its Discontents/Las Vegas Gleaner] Read more on …
  drunken louts

AMERICA’S WORST GOVERNOR: “Gov. Jim Gibbons has become a fleeting presence in Carson City, rarely showing up at his Capitol office and making few public appearances.” [Las Vegas Sun]
 

JIM GIBBONS DIVORCE INSANITY:

America’s worst governor and alcoholic adulterous sex-assaulter crook Jim Gibbons and his power-crazed wife Dawn are finally getting the divorce everybody always knew they’d get, and it’s going to be ugly, and the court documents are hilarious. [My Silver State/Las Vegas Gleaner] Read more on JIM GIBBONS DIVORCE INSANITY:…
 

Nevada’s Drunken Idiot Governor Divorcing His Wife For Some Reason

Dawn Gibbons has been living in the Nevada Governor’s Mansion alone since earlier this year. Jim Gibbons, the moronic alcoholic waitress-assaulting sex criminal who was comically elected governor in 2006 and took a secret midnight oath of office in his Reno living room, has moved back to that Reno house. He served Dawn with divorce papers, but she says he won’t tell her why he’s divorcing her. Read more on Nevada’s Drunken Idiot Governor Divorcing His Wife For Some Reason…
 

Cretin Nevada Gov. Jim Gibbons Having ‘Family Meeting’ To Get Divorced

The divorce gossip is basically true! Halfway through a disastrous scandal-ridden first (possibly fictional) term as Nevada’s governor, rat-eyed corrupt paranoid-schizophrenic alcoholic cocktail-waitress-assaulting Jim Gibbons is having a “family meeting” this weekend to make a divorce deal with Dawn Gibbons, his long-suffering yet power-mad wife. This is according to the Reno Gazette Journal, quoting Gibbons’ own office. Congratulations, Dawn! Maybe your settlement will include that briefcase full of bribe money and poker chips the lobbyists brought you on the cruise ship! Future of Gibbons marriage uncertain [RGJ] Read more on Cretin Nevada Gov. Jim Gibbons Having ‘Family Meeting’ To Get Divorced…
 

Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons Served With Divorce Papers?

During our most sordid American midterm campaign, Congressman Jim Gibbons brought important attention to his bid for the governorship of Nevada by getting caught in some sleazy Vegas scene where he allegedly tried to drag a cocktail waitress back to his hotel room and then pretty much threatened to dump her corpse in the desert if she complained. Oh, Jim Gibbons, we have missed your stupid antics. Your nice wife Dawn Gibbons? Not so much. We hear she had divorce papers delivered to you Wednesday. Read more on Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons Served With Divorce Papers?…
 

Drunken Idiot Crook Nevada Guv Now Popular As Bush!

Jim Gibbons has made it big: The Nevada governor got a whole news-feature about him in the New York Times! What attracted the big city paper’s attention? Well, it turns out Gibbons has an impressive approval rating of 28% after just five months on the job. It took George W. Bush five years to hit 28%. Read more on Drunken Idiot Crook Nevada Guv Now Popular As Bush!…
 

Checking In With Drunken Crook Jim Gibbons

Hi, Governor Jim! How have you been? Oh, you went on a cruise with this guy, who now tells the FBI he saw you taking $100,000 in bribes from a Nevada contractor? Oh, you got the contractor tens of millions in federal contracts, when you were in Congress? That’s great. And you guys all got loaded and put napkins on your head and … what, pretended to be hip-hop stars or something? Did you yell out comical ebonics stuff, too? Read more on Checking In With Drunken Crook Jim Gibbons…
 

Jim Gibbons’ Assault Victims Now Packing Bombs

Somebody blew themselves up with got blown up by a “backpack bomb” in a Las Vegas hotel garage this morning. Political experts say it was likely a desperate attempt to send a message to Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons, famous for his drunken assaults in Vegas parking structures. Read more on Jim Gibbons’ Assault Victims Now Packing Bombs…
 

Daily Briefing: Delivery Of The Sphere

* Democrats going to the mat with White House over “encroachments on privacy and civil liberties.” [WP, WSJ] * Hillary Clinton is the undisputed world heavy weight champion of getting paid. [WP, NYT, LAT] * Al-Qaida just as good as new. [NYT] * Hopefully Tommy Thompson is in Iowa for his health. [WP, NYT] * Recording interviews with suspects is a “non-starter” with the FBI. Illegal use of surveillance and bungling of cases still fine, obv. [NYT] * Nevada governor Jim Gibbons is “a fast-motion train wreck.” [WP] * President Bush will not be throwing out the first pitch at the Nationals home opener this afternoon as both the team and the White House worry about being associated with such a loser. [WP] Read more on Daily Briefing: Delivery Of The Sphere…
 

Jim Gibbons: Probably Really Nevada’s Governor, Definitely A Corrupt Scumbag

Since we are bloggers and thus TOTALLY FIXATED on accuracy and fairness, we feel a need to point out that, contrary to our earlier post on the subject, Jim Gibbons may in fact be the legal governor of the great state of Nevada. Turns out that Gibbons did in fact resign from Congress on December 31 — there’s even a letter — so his oath of office in his living room as governor later that night was legal, if totally insane. Read more on Jim Gibbons: Probably Really Nevada’s Governor, Definitely A Corrupt Scumbag…
 

Daily Briefing: No Class

* House Iraq wrist-slap resolution day is today. Thanks to Harry Reid, Senate will be voting tomorrow while you drink. [WP, WP, NYT] * The, “and then what” part of the resolution still escapes Democrats. [LAT] * Other troop surge, in that other war, couldn’t get a Senate vote on a Wednesday if they promised a bowl of navy bean soup for showing up. [WP, NYT] * Shady dealings of Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons still lack hookers. [WP, NYT] * Condoleezza Rice was this close to a Palestinian-Israeli peace deal. [USAT] * Start stockpiling water and granola bars now – the “Y2K7DSTFU” is upon us! [WSJ] * The blood-thirsty congress-murdering rhetoric of Abraham Lincoln. [WP] Read more on Daily Briefing: No Class…
 

Fake Governor Under Real Investigation

Jim Gibbons still holds power in Nevada despite bloggers’ incontrovertible evidence that he’s not really governor. Nevertheless, it seems that he’s more likely to be hounded from the office he holds illegitimately due to the usual boring ethics charges from his Congressional days involving gobs of ill-gotten cash from defense contractors. Read more on Fake Governor Under Real Investigation…
 

Nevadans Soon To Enjoy Glorious, Somalia-Style Leaderless Anarchy

It’s a a damn shame that Wonkette West Coast Bureau Chief Ken Layne went on vacation just when Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons, one of Ken’s least favorite people ever, was revealed to not really be the governor at all, but just some white guy in a bad suit wandering around the governor’s mansion giving orders. All the details, after the jump. Read more on Nevadans Soon To Enjoy Glorious, Somalia-Style Leaderless Anarchy…
 

Jim Gibbons Is America’s Stupidest Governor

Wonkette readers know that new Nevada governor Jim Gibbons is a violent delusional drunk and corrupt thug who keeps illegal aliens in his basement, but he’s also a world-class moron! The dingbat do-nothing ex-congressman and not-really-sworn-in guv has been impressing Nevadans with his shocking ignorance of his own policies. Neither Gibbons nor his staff have any knowledge of the sweeping and expensive new educational system they’re importing from Canada for some reason. Drunky had to attend a seminar last week just so he could learn a few terms to repeat like a pea-brained bird. “This looks like a train wreck in progress as the cars start to, one by one, tumble off the tracks,” Jon Ralston writes in the Las Vegas Sun. “And the real danger for any politician is not relentless criticism but unceasing caricaturing and ridicule. We are almost there.” Read more on Jim Gibbons Is America’s Stupidest Governor…
 

Psychotic Nevada Guv’s Midnight Oath Scam Revealed!

Why did violent, delusional alcoholic Jim Gibbons take the oath as Nevada’s newest and craziest governor at 12:00:12 a.m. on January 1? Initial reports blamed some make-believe terror threat because Saddam Hussein supporters would certainly target some nobody in Northern Nevada to avenge the Iraqi president’s hanging. But the real reason for the bizarre midnight ceremony in Gibbons’ Reno living room has less to do with the sociopath’s terror fantasies than his cheap mafia casino power grabs and fanatical loathing for the popular, competent and sane outgoing governor, Republican Kenny Guinn. Learn all about the pig-eyed thug’s latest filthy schemes, after the jump. Read more on Psychotic Nevada Guv’s Midnight Oath Scam Revealed!…