jim demint

It’s farm bill time in the Senate, with the draft bill out of committee, debate open, and hundreds of amendments pouring in, all lined up just in time beat the June 30 deadline! The way they used to resolve all of these competing amendments and regional interests and endless lobbyist demands in the end was […]

Lame non-magical toad wart Jim DeMint just lives to annoy fellow South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham, doesn’t he? Jim DeMint ruined Lindsey Graham’s dreams of a GOP Senate majority, refused to allocate funding for some local science project that ol’ Ham Biscuits desperately wanted and then voted against Lindsey’s beloved “China you suck” bill to […]

Glenn Beck’s contract with Fox News expires in December, and you know what that means: George Soros is a scheming Puppet Master and/or Jew. Wait, no! It means Glenn Beck’s teevee chalkboard lessons and Cash4Gold infomercials will probably be canceled, since only the cream of the crazy milk watches his show anymore. But people familiar […]

U.S. Sen. Jim DeMint’s keynote speech next month to an Iowa forum for Republican presidential candidates has fueled hopes among some evangelicals and conservative activists that the South Carolinian will launch a White House run. DeMint, overwhelmingly elected to his second Senate term in November, will deliver the evening banquet address to a dozen GOP […]

Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) will force readings of both a nuclear arms treaty and $1.1 trillion spending bill that could eat up hours of the remaining lame-duck Congress. DeMint will invoke a senatorial privilege to ask that texts of both the New START Treaty and the 2011 omnibus spending bill be read aloud on the […]

Harry Reid is going to finally try to get a cloture vote passed to be able to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell today some day soon, at long last, but there’s a very good chance it will fail, because our modern democracy is so advanced that it doesn’t work and can’t rule on matters of […]

John F. Kennedy was assassinated forty-seven years ago today. Where were you when you read The Warren Report, and then laughed? We will probably never know if H. L. Hunt hired Blackwater to shoot JFK in the head, but most people reject the Oswald conspiracy theories and have accepted that President Handsomepants’ violent murder was […]

The Republican Party has taken a step back from their sweeping victory in America’s ultimate, #1, super repudiation of big government to wonder why, in fact, they didn’t take control of BOTH halves of our two-headed legislative branch; the answer to this conundrum can only be that Jim DeMint is a stupid face. Jim DeMint, […]

All legislation must now be cleared with America’s Dad Jim DeMint first or else he will shut down the Senate, according to an e-mail sent to Senate chiefs of staff today. And so we have another example of Jim DeMint trying to out-Republican everyone else, this time in terms of obstructing bills. Senate rules were […]

Lisa Murkowski is the world’s biggest loser/jerk-off for not volunteering to work fifty hours a week as an unpaid intern for Joe Miller’s Senate campaign. And now for some reason Lisa Murkowski gets to keep her seat on her important Energy Committee, even though Jim DeMint said she wasn’t allowed to. Aren’t women supposed to […]

HE HAS THE VOTES. In the musical that will be made about Mitch McConnell’s life, this will be one of the songs: “He Has the Votes.” It will be a neo-Negro-spiritual song. YES, Mitch McConnell said he’s already locked up the votes to keep his minority (MAJORITY?) leader job in the next Congress, so you […]

Jedi master Alvin Greene has destroyed his political opposition by not destroying his political opposition, and has accomplished more by simply sitting in peace and mindfulness than the most powerful campaign machine has accomplished with the usual clumsy blunt force tactics of “fund raising” and “advertising.” But who is the bigger fool? The fool, or […]

The latest fundraising figures are in (and by “in,” we mean somebody called Alvin), and it appears a thousand dollars have come to Alvin Greene so far in his lack of a campaign. That’s 1/3500 the amount his opponent Jim DeMint has actively raised, which is an action out of step with The Way. It’s […]

Alvin Greene Mania has swept Britain! Today The Guardian has their very own profile of one British reporter’s pilgrimage to the hovel of South Carolina Daoist monk Alvin Greene. It is accompanied by a nice photo of Greene talking on the phone with your Wonkette (probably) while he’s writing koans with a simple pencil. The […]

Today the AP has a story about Greene (who, you will remember, is the South Carolina Democratic candidate for U.S. Senate and a practicing Daoist monk) with the BIG REVEAL that he was nicknamed “Turtle” in high school, according to his tennis coach, because yes, Alvin Greene was the only black kid on the high […]