Tag Archives: jesse jackson

  why did the bigot cross the road?

Fox’s Katie Pavlich: Just Because I’m Scared Of Black People Doesn’t Make Me Racist

Poor Katie Pavlich is just sick and tired of all the racism out there, and on Fox’s The Five Wednesday disagreed vehemently with the crazy notion that we all have prejudices. God knows she’s not prejudiced, although sometimes she does find it necessary to judge people in advance, like if she sees a black kid on the street and she crosses to the other side. But that’s not prejudice. It’s just good pre-judgment, duh. Read more on Fox’s Katie Pavlich: Just Because I’m Scared Of Black People Doesn’t Make Me Racist…
  he would not could not with a goat

Jesse Jackson Shows Ted Cruz How ‘Green Eggs And Ham’ Should be Read

Last night, some weasel-faced Canadian read Green Eggs and Ham to the Senate. Here’s a clip of Jesse Jackson giving the book justice on SNL after Theodore Geisel died in 1991. (It’s not the full version, unfortunately; completists can find a not-great-quality version — which we could not embed, unfortunately — here.) Read more on Jesse Jackson Shows Ted Cruz How ‘Green Eggs And Ham’ Should be Read…
  storage whores

You Finally Have A Chance To Get The Sexy Jesse Jackson Jr. Swag You’ve Always Dreamed Of

So you’ve got some coin in your pocket. It’s jingle-jangle-jingling and you’ve been thinking “hey, I wish I could simultaneously celebrate a politician’s fall from grace AND get some really outrageously bad fashion-y type stuff in the process.” People with more money than sense, today is your day. Jesse Jackson Jr’s confiscated forfeited booty is at auction and it could be yours all yours. NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY?? Read more on You Finally Have A Chance To Get The Sexy Jesse Jackson Jr. Swag You’ve Always Dreamed Of…
  i have a nightmare

You Will Definitely Believe How Racist This Daily Caller Article Is

We’ve seen a lot of racist nonsense in our time, but this contribution from the Daily Caller and Major General US Army Jerry Curry Retired Thank Goodness is truly special, a diamond-encrusted nuclear butt plug of are-you-even-serious-dude that makes us wonder if Jerry Curry, who served semi-prominently under Carter, Reagan, and Bush Sr., is feeling okay. Because holy. fucking. shit (emphasis ours): The question is can [black] families and communities ever be reconstituted again, and do we have a sufficient number of black leaders who can and are able to shoulder the vision and burdens of a Martin Luther King, Jr.? Can Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton do it? If the answer is no, and I believe it is, then America’s white leadership will have to get rid of them and select their replacements. Why don’t I suggest that Black Democrats select the replacements? Because Black Democrats are fine for house work, but not for doing heavy lifting. Name one that has put forward a meaningful call to action with a plan to restore the black family and community. Read more on You Will Definitely Believe How Racist This Daily Caller Article Is…
  can't something be done about these liberal race baiters?

Forget ‘White Hispanic'; Daily Caller, Fox, Find White Teen Who Is ‘Black’

So, you may have heard about the awful murder of an Australian baseball player by three teens in Duncan, Oklahoma. The killers more or less admitted to killing Chris Lane for the fun of it as he was out for a jog. It’s sick and disgusting. But what’s really outrageous, according to Fox & Friends, Fox Nation, WND, the Daily Caller, and former congresscritter Allen West, is the horrifying double standard of the national media and professional race-baiters like Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, and Barack Obama, because they aren’t treating this murder of a white man by three black teens as an outrage, like they did the shooting of Trayvon Martin. Oh, except one of the “three black teens” is white. Also, they were arrested and charged right away, not given a handshake and a “Good job standing your ground, dude!” by the police. Otherwise, the two killings are virtually identical. Read more on Forget ‘White Hispanic'; Daily Caller, Fox, Find White Teen Who Is ‘Black’…
  he fought the law and the law won

Jesse Jackson Jr. Pleads Guilty To Purchasing Awesome Things

Today at Wonkette, we are thankful. We are thankful that we are not politicians and cannot get in the level of trouble Mr. Jesse Jackson Jr. got himself into, what with the getting arrested, having to resign his seat, and having to plead guilty today to a felony count of conspiracy. But today at Wonkette, we are also so jealous, you guys, because if we WERE Jesse Jackson Jr., we could have stolen money and purchased the greatest amount of self-indulgent things ever: Read more on Jesse Jackson Jr. Pleads Guilty To Purchasing Awesome Things…
  blowvember

Chicago’s Favorite Underage-Sexytime Congressman Wants Jesse Jackson Jr.’s Job Please

Yr. Wonkette was recently distressed to hear we’d be losing Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr. because of first world brain problems (and maybe also because of that federal investigation?), but it’s time to relax and breath a huge sigh of relief. Guys, Mel Reynolds is running to fill Jackson Jr’s empty seat! Perhaps you don’t remember Mel Reynolds? Allow us to fill you in. During the 1990s, when everyone wore awful pants and angst rose rapidly alongside the economy, Reynolds defeated Rep. Gus Savage for Chicago’s 2nd Congressional seat, the same spot he hopes to fill in Jackson Jr’s wake. He had lost two previous elections against Savage, but by 1992 allegations had arisen that Savage had done that thing politicians can’t help but do — he engaged in sexual misconduct, forcing himself on a Peace Corps volunteer in Zaire. Two years after this election, Reynolds was himself accused of engaging in a sexual relationship with a 16 year old campaign intern. Since Chicago is Chicago, Reynolds was elected to office for a 2nd term without opposition, and continued to serve until his conviction for the offense mentioned above, as well as obstruction of justice and solicitation of child pornography. Oh, Mel. Read more on Chicago’s Favorite Underage-Sexytime Congressman Wants Jesse Jackson Jr.’s Job Please…
  that's not racial transcendence

WND Journalism About Gay Obama’s Arranged Marriage To Lazy Michelle Not At All Racist

America’s most credible journalist, Jerome Corsi, has a new installment out in his series on how a young, homosexual Barack Obama got ahead in Chicago politics. This piece focuses on his arranged marriage to Michelle Obama, who, Corsi strongly implies, is also black. For example, Michelle has been known to use secret black code language: [Jesse] Jackson’s daughter, Santita, is still one of Michelle’s best friends. Santita and Jesse Jr. call her “sis,” short for “sister.” There’s also the subject of her, um, work habits: Read more on WND Journalism About Gay Obama’s Arranged Marriage To Lazy Michelle Not At All Racist…
  the dull pain that you live with isn't getting any duller

Nobody’s Seen Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. For A Month, By The Way

Were you aware that Jesse Jackson, Jr., son of the famous Jesse Jackson that you all know from civil rights and such, is a Congressman, from Barack Obama and Rod Blagojevich’s socialist Chicago paradise? He is! Did you know that he hasn’t been in Congress or seen by anyone since June 10? That is also true, and the jokesters at WLS, Chicago’s favorite all-right-wing talk radio AM station, are having some fun with this fact, like with the silly get well card at right. He is supposedly suffering from “exhaustion,” which as far as we were aware is code for “Demi Moore likes to do whip-its” and is not a recognized medical condition. This story should stay hilarious, so long as the rumors that he tried to kill himself continue to not be true! Read more on Nobody’s Seen Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. For A Month, By The Way…
  black cock-us

Jesse Jackson, Jr. Admits To Sexytime With Dolphin Model, Not To Huge Bribe

According to a “major political fund-raiser” who has talked to federal authorities, former fat guy Congressman Jesse Jackson, Jr. directed him to raise $6 million in campaign contributions to buy the Senate seat Rod Blagojevich was selling. Jackson denied that today. But the source also told them that Jackson was having an affair with Giovanna Huidobro, a D.C. restaurant hostess and model, and had directed the source to pay for two of her airline trips to see him. Jackson didn’t really deny that one today. Of course there are internet photos of this Huidobro lady, posing sexily, with dolphins. Read more on Jesse Jackson, Jr. Admits To Sexytime With Dolphin Model, Not To Huge Bribe…
  blaggy's world

Jesse Jackson Jr. Was That ‘Candidate #5′ Who Had Sex With Kristen, In Washington

Ha ha, sucks: “WASHINGTON — Federal authorities on Wednesday identified Democratic Representative Jesse Jackson Jr. of Illinois as the potential United States Senate candidate who was portrayed in court papers made public Tuesday as being the most deeply enmeshed in the alleged scheme by Gov. Rod Blagojevich to benefit from his appointment of a new senator to the seat vacated by President-elect Barack Obama.” Uh oh, Daddy Jackson will have to CUT HIS NUTZ OFF now. Read more on Jesse Jackson Jr. Was That ‘Candidate #5′ Who Had Sex With Kristen, In Washington…
  replacements

Who Will Be The Next Barack Obama?

Our President-elect has mastered the art of time travel and can shoot laser beams from his nipples, but he hasn’t figured out yet how to be in two places at the same time. ERGO, somebody must fill his senatorial seat while he is off being the President. But who, hmmm? Jesse Jackson Jr. seems to be making a lot of noise about he wants the seat, but that is what those Jacksons do — talk endlessly about whatever. Read more on Who Will Be The Next Barack Obama?…
  oopsies

Dan Rather Continues To Say Strange Things On Teevee!

Here’s beloved liberal Dan Rather responding to a comment from former NFL star Tiki Barber on today’s edition of MSNBC’s Morning Joe, about Jesse Jackson’s influence in politics. We did not see the show as it aired, so we aren’t sure why arbitrary celebrity bums were picked off the street to host today. Point is, Dan Rather says he appreciates Jesse Jackson and that Jackson was importantly “paving the way for an Osama bin Laden to appear.” Our friends on the right would agree! We think he meant “Barack Osama bin Laden,” however. [YouTube] Read more on Dan Rather Continues To Say Strange Things On Teevee!…
  that's not racial transcendence

JESSE JACKSON IS A TRAITOR TO HIS RACE: While not-so-discreetly attacking Barack Obama, who also won South Carolina, Jesse Jackson said the most terrible word of all. Read more on …
  old coots

John McLaughlin Shouts About Some Fancy Biracial Snack Food

Apparently someone on Earth still watches The McLaughlin Group and thank god for that, because old coot host John McLaughlin tends to say some pretty funny things about this Barack Obama character. A couple of months ago he interrupted Eleanor Clift’s Obama analysis and shouted “WARREN HARDING WAS A NEGRO,” which is true. While McLaughlin’s performance yesterday doesn’t quite match that, it’s still a fine piece of old coot theatrics: he rants that Obama is an “oreo,” meaning he wants to dip him in milk and eat him. And here’s a longer version in which you can view Peter Beinart’s slappy reaction. [YouTube, CNN] Read more on John McLaughlin Shouts About Some Fancy Biracial Snack Food…
  media censorship

News Anchors Cannot Say ‘Nuts’ On Air, Hilarity Ensues

So yeah, apparently the Hays code or whatever prevents you from saying “nuts” on the teevee unless you mean “crazy” or “consumable food items that come in shells.” So if you are Wolf Blitzer, you rattle on about the horrifying crudity of a particular phrase that Jesse Jackson uttered, and then you make all your guests kind of stumble around awkwardly about “things only a man would have,” so that Americans everywhere turn to each other and ask, “Is he talking about cum rags?” [236.com] Read more on News Anchors Cannot Say ‘Nuts’ On Air, Hilarity Ensues…