Your Guide To Jenna Bush’s Trashy Texas Wedding
Friday, May 9th, 2008
Finally, George and Laura have almost married off one of the First Twins! It only took eight years, but Jenna found a “taker” and she’s getting hitched tomorrow at her parents’ fake “ranch” in Crawford, which sounds only a little better than “Waco,” and it’s time to celebrate the occasion with a bunch of bullshit trivia, after the jump. MORE »











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NATION OF CRETINS: “A man who heckled Laura and Jenna Bush as they were leaving a discussion about their children’s book was arrested after he allegedly punched a girl who was in a wheelchair.” [
It’s all happening! Jenna is really getting married to that one guy, Henry! They will live in Baltimore! But to really make “living in Baltimore” seem romantic, they will exchange vows at Jenna’s mom and dad’s retirement home in Waco, Texas. All the incredible details of the May 10 nuptials are suddenly coming to light.
All presidents and all presidential family members worship Satan, so it’s no surprise that 
At yesterday’s