israel
Mitt Romney’s Slaphappy Israel Party: A Roundup
Mitt Romney had mondo problems winning over the British on the first leg of his diplomatic photo-op vacation, so you know what? Screw the “Special Relationship.” Israel is now more special-er to the United States Empire than England ever was, harumph, so that’s where Mitt Romney spent his last couple of days before jetting off [...]
Mitt Romney Lies About His BFF Bibi
When we were in high school we had a friend who claimed his family was really tight with Morgan Freeman’s, and he’d tell us all kinds of hilarious stories about the good times he’d had, just hanging out with Morgan Freeman and having all kinds of deep talks wherein Morgan would generously give him sage [...]
Mitt Romney Considers First Ever Global War Tour!
Whatta we got in the local clip ‘n’ save today? “Mitt Romney’s campaign is considering a major foreign policy offensive at the end of the month that would take him to five countries over three continents…” HMMMMM. You have to wait until you *win* the presidential election to launch world war, dingus. And then it’s [...]
U.S. Embassy in Israel Tweeting Quotes From Henry Ford, Prominent Hater of Jews
Just in case some of you aren’t reading tweets from U.S. embassies at 2 a.m., we of Your Wonkette are always On The Ball and keeping an eye on such things. And tonight, well, it got a bit silly. The U.S Embassy in Tel Aviv was tweeting up a storm — as part of their [...]
Talmudic Scholar Pat Robertson: It’s Not Their Fault The ‘Poor Jews’ Are So Stupid (VIDEO!)
The fine fellows at RightWingWatch have once again brought the most delightful of horrorshows to our attention. (How do they do it every day?) Below, you will find Pat Robertson explaining that anti-Semitism is the Devil’s Work (yes?), and the Devil hates Israel because Israel is evidence of the existence of God (oookay?) because the [...]
Chris Christie Does Jerusalem: Vacation Pix!
The Good Governor Sandwiches of New Jersey, Chris Christie, is in Israel, on his first official overseas trip as head of an American state. (He’s making up for President Obama, who refuses to visit Israel because he Hates Jews.) How many unionized public school teachers will he yell at on YouTube while there? We await [...]
Silly Jewishes, War Criminal Congressman Allen West Knows What Is Best For You (War)
Did you know that there are Jewish people who sometimes think that Israel is wrong — and some of those Jewish people actually live there? Also there is a group of liberal Jews* (what? Shut yo mouth!) in New York mostly, who do liberal things, like want peace, which is kind of a Jewish tradition. [...]
Iran’s Stubborn Refusal To Start Building Nukes Hindering Fun War Plans
Here’s a typical variation on the same disturbing/hilarious lede that we see every few months, each time rendering satire useless: “Reporting from Washington— As U.S. and Israeli officials talk publicly about the prospect of a military strike against Iran’s nuclear program, one fact is often overlooked: U.S. intelligence agencies don’t believe Iran is actively trying [...]
Newspaper Editor Suggests Israel Assassinate Obama
Andrew Adler, who owns an Atlanta-based newspaper called the Atlanta Jewish Times, wrote an op-ed last week in which he theorized on what Israel could do about its relationship with the United States vis à vis Iran. As Adler sees it, Israel has three options, and one of them involves “ordering a hit on” President [...]
Doomsday Clock 5 Minutes ‘Til Midnight; Iranian Assassinated
How are things? Bad? Oh. Well, there’s always “Angry Birds” or whatever. Oxycontin. And the fancy scientist people have moved the “symbolic” Doomsday Clock another minute closer to Midnight. This does not mean “another minute closer to Santa’s visit,” or whatever the popular superstitions are these days. It means the world will come to an [...]
Ever Since Arafat Turned Him Down, Newt Swears Palestinians Don’t Exist
A long time ago, when amoral sperm whale Newt Gingrich was simultaneously banging another extramarital bimbo and prosecuting Bill Clinton for an extramarital sexytime, Newt was also deeply in love with Palestinian heartthrob Yasser Arafat.
Liveblogging the GOP Dingbats Debating This Mysterious World
It’s time for the least-informed people in America to debate the whole world, or something! Welcome, happy thanksgiving! We finally have the CNN livefeed working, and now it’s time to painstakingly document the Brutal Idiocy we are about to be subjected to, for America.
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