Trump talks with Kissinger, REXXON's 'fucking moron' gets worse, and Mike Ditka is a fucking idiot. Your BIG morning news brief!
Trump holds another rally, the military is holding everything together, and the NRA wants to kill all the cute critters. Your morning news brief!
Mueller ain't fucking around, West Virginia sees red, and the all the Russia shit's going down on ... LINKED IN??? Your morning news brief!
Looks Like Trump is sending his staff into the Thunderdome again.
SkinnyCare fails, The Mooch gets mouthy, and the GOP tries dragging Hillary into Trump-Russia. Your morning news brief.
Trump is mad Robert Mueller isn't a golfer, Paul Manafort is a terrible criminal, Betsy DeVos gives herself a participation trophy. Your morning news brief.
John McCain ready to keep kicking ass, Trump gives another INSANE interview, and zombie TrumpCare tries one last scare. Your morning news brief.
Well, this story is very unfair to Jesus!
TrumpCare might get worse, Princess Ivanka tries to stay out of politics, and it's LOW-ENERGY week at Trump's White House. Your morning news brief!
Is Trey Gowdy the dumbest fucking cracker in Congress again? WHOA IF TRUE!
Trump blows another opportunity to act like an adult, Jeff Sessions tries to be legally racist, and Fox News has LOW RATINGS. Your morning news brief.
He only wants to help Trump prove he didn't leak classified information!
Hahahahahaha oh God, he literally is shitting on Israel. Is today's GOP cool with that?
Even Jason Chaffetz is pretending to grow a spine. Plus you see this crazy shit with the Turkish dictator's bodyguards kicking protesters' asses on DC's Embassy Row?
There's no scandal to see here folks, just move along. HE SAID MOVE ALONG!