New York Times “lightning rod conservative” columnist Bill Kristol’s youth and young manhood was exactly this: Manhattan prep school, Harvard, more Harvard. Since then, he has devoted his career to sending other young people to die in catastrophic wars based on a false ideology of pre-emptive regime change. But as he notes in his column today, despite these great achievements, he can’t write an adequate commencement speech! MORE »

West Virginia’s Robert Byrd, the president pro-tem of the U.S. Senate and a former member of the KKK, has endorsed — gasp! — the Kenyan candidate, Barack Obama! Although he hates black people, Byrd notes that he has “been one of the most outspoken opponents of the Bush administration’s misguided war in Iraq and its saber rattling around the globe,” and this shared view is Obama’s appeal to him. And lest we forget, Byrd made some pretty harrowing speeches before and at the outset of the Iraq War. [Charleston Gazette]

Well fuck all. The Politico’s Mike Allen held an interview with President Bush today in which the Commander-in-Chief announced how he is showing his gratitude to the troops. “I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the commander in chief playing golf… I feel I owe it to the families to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal.” Can’t… what the… some game vs. death… DOES NOT COMPUTE. [Jonathan Martin]

The liberal terrorists at MoveOn.org are launching a $1 million ad campaign (heyo!) against John McCain, because who the hell else is gonna do it, JESUS H. CHRIST (Mike Huckabee)? The first ad is running in some states where McCain has been running his own ads unopposed, and it features a birthday cake. Or an anniversary cake. It’s an Iraq Birthday-Anniversary Cake, celebrating 5-100 years of fun in the sun! Stupid liberals always miss the point — if you make cake analogous to a vote for John McCain, everyone will vote for John McCain. Check out the Elitism ad below. MORE »

DUMB OLD GEORGE W. BUSH LOATHED BY TELEVISION COMMUNITY: Remember when George W. Bush appeared on NBC’s Deal or No Deal program Monday night and joked that he’s “thrilled to be anywhere with high ratings these days,” before honoring a decorated war veteran? Well this particular episode of Deal brought in the lowest ratings the show has ever had. [NYP]

Llewellyn Werner is a California investor who doesn’t like death, but does like Disneyland. Most of us don’t draw the distinction, but Werner wants to replace the former with the latter in Baghdad with “The Baghdad Zoo and Entertainment Experience,” a developing “American-style amusement park that will feature a skateboard park, rides, a concert theatre and a museum.” Christ, wasn’t the plan to get the oil first and then destroy them with Americanization? Priorities, people. MORE »

Here is American President George W. Bush’s special message to a friendly contestant on NBC’s Deal Or No Deal last night. The contestant was a soldier in Iraq who won many Purple Hearts. Bush honors his service by making jokes about how low his approval rating is and how Congress is incapable of effecting positive change on a single person’s life. [NBC]

Today is Tax Day, which means a lot of liberals JUST LIKE YOU get to whine about how they are involuntarily funding the War when what they really hate is paying taxes, just like “ordinary Americans.” Join us in our tour of Daily Kos commenters yodelling like Libertarians about how much, and why, they hate taxes. MORE »

Hillary Clinton pretended to be a senator during this morning’s Armed Services Committee hearings with Gen. David Petraeus and U.S. Ambassador to Iraq Ryan Crocker. She asked him all sorts of questions about why Barack Obama is so dumb. That, and Iraq. Look at how seriously she speaks! She is such a Tuff Guy sometimes, especially when David Petraeus starts shooting at her with snipers. And if you want to see her introductory speech, it is after the jump. She is very serious in that one too! Does America was a serious president, or John McCain? MORE »

A reader writes, “Did you check out Dana Milbank of the Washington Post’s antics two rows over Petraeus’s right shoulder during his opening statement? Squirming, standing, twisting, straining to read the Code Pink banners, paying no attention to any of Petraeus’s comments about life and death nor the situation on the ground in Iraq - just making a complete and utter nuisance and distraction of himself?”

Why yes, yes we did — we believe he was even caught on film. [Photo via NYT]

The Surge has already worked, but now it is starting to un-work. The Green Zone in Baghdad is under attack, and there is a battle in Basra between various factions of Shiites, Sunni militias, U.S. soldiers and the fake Iraq army. Famous “Shiite cleric” Muqtada al-Sadr’s cease-fire with the Maliki government has splintered his group, and now al-Sadr is under pressure to disregard the cease-fire entirely. Sunni insurgents have only been peaceful because the Americans bribed them, but now they are for some reason shooting at each other too. Temporary calm has devolved into chaos, forever. And that is why President George W. Bush responded today that this is a “very positive” development. Al Qaeda is on the run, or something! MORE »