Because the Obama Administration hates Iran’s freedoms so much, it has rescinded permission for U.S. embassies to invite Iranian diplomats to their Fourth of July parties. Come on, parents, don’t take it out on the kids! Robert Gibbs said the change in policy came about “given the events of the past many days,” referring to Mark Sanford’s cumming. State Department spokesperson Ian Kelly, however, “said no Iranians have accepted” the invitations anyway and “indicated that the U.S. saw little reason for them to, given the political crisis over their disputed presidential election.” Again: maybe they would have accepted if you had promised a Super Soaker war. They’re just like water cannons! [AP]

• Here is FBI footage of Marion Barry at what is obviously a Victor Uwaifo concert, and look, Marion is dancing the Crip Walk! — which unfortunately for him is a massive violation of his parole. Will Barry do time for dabbling in a little harmless inverted heel-toe, or will he manage to beat the charges? [Flickr]
• Oh hey it’s Iran’s favorite squirt gun salesman Oliver North, the American Hero who wore necklaces made of human skulls during his 100 voluntary tours in Vietnam. And he’s teaming up with a few zany Congressloons to bring you: Judeo-Christian Sovereignty Force, which is a new and very humorous cartoon on Adult Swim. [TPM]
• State Rep. Cynthia Davis (R-MO) hates how Big Government gives “food handouts” to impoverished children, because God knows they probably just spend all that food on alcohol and even if they don’t, “Hunger can be a positive motivator.” [Think Progress]
• Why is New York Times journalist David Rohde safe when our military is in infinite peril? So typical, especially because we all know who threatens our National Security: yes you, David Rohde, and all the other blabbermouth journalists! [Michelle Malkin]
• Aspiring Florida Senator Marco Rubio has been fantasizing on Twitter about how great it would be if everyone in Iran had a gun, because guns have prevented suspicious elections in Florida many many times, more times than we could count without having to recount just to make sure we counted correctly. [HuffPost]

Very smart ex-prosecutor person Andrew C. “Andy” McCarthy knows most things about Barack Obama, including all of his secrets. McCarthy’s top achievement in life has been proving that Bill Ayers ghostwrote Obama’s memoir Dreams Of My Father. Not many people knew about this, and it was a journalistic scoop, and so is this: “The fact is that, as a man of the hard Left, Obama is more comfortable with a totalitarian Islamic regime than he would be with a free Iranian society.” That’s the fact, okay? MORE »

Wonkette recently deployed its own correspondent to Iran. What follows is her report. Names have been changed “because of the definition of anonymity.”  

Hi ya’ll! I’m so honored to be here with all the world-renowned Iranians. As a daughter, and as a Republican woman who is both a fiscal and social Democrat, I feel I am well prepared for my new anonymous position as Wonkette’s Anonymous Tehran Youth Correspondent Executive Bureau Chief. In case you haven’t been following the news through Twitter or Daily Candy, there was just an election here, in Iran, for President. Now, because of the definition of anonymity, I can’t say too too much about how, but I know things about presidential elections. Lots of things. Things that would make you say to me, “Listen, Mawiyah, you should be the first girl to cover a presidential election with a blog.” And you would be absolutely right to say that. I should be. And I was. But I don’t want to say too much.  MORE »

This is what the Muslims look like. [NYT]

Who does Bill Bennett think he is, Bill Safire? He went on John King’s show yesterday and threw around a bunch of ten-dollar words but did not have the decency to wear a necktie, or even a collar. This pudgy slob who could not get seated for brunch at a decent restaurant is very disappointed that our president has not ordered an airlift to shower the Iranian people with phone cards and “duplication machines” to help with their revolution. [CNN]

Are there many things less funny than hot new memes rife with LOLcat spin-offs? Well, this one, “Pete Hoekstra is a Meme” — based on this tragic war tale — is pretty funny, and should be for the next seven hours or so. Anyway, some of you have asked for an Iran open thread, about (the start of) the Khamenei crackdown, so consider this it. Hopefully everyone in Iran and on Twitter stays safe. Fuck bad people.

If there’s one thing everybody can agree upon, it’s that the brave democracy protesters in Iran deserve at least our moral support, right? It’s not like it costs money or risks our safety to, say, put a “me too” green stripe on our dumb blogs, right? NO WRONG, IDIOTS, Ron Paul just cast the lone opposing vote on the harmless House Resolution 560, “Expressing support for all Iranian citizens who embrace the values of freedom, human rights, civil liberties, and rule of law, and for other purposes.” MORE »

By the Comics Curmudgeon
Look, kids, your Comics Curmudgeon loves freedom, and loves peaceful revolutions, and would dearly love to see something good happen in Iran — something other than hopeful young college students beaten to death by thugs with sticks, or, maybe worse, things just staying the same. Your Comics Curmudgeon also enjoys the Twitter, because it offers the opportunity to plug my various stupid projects and share ludicrous spam subject lines I receive. But here’s the thing: I do not believe these two things go together. That is why I have not made my Twitter green, or changed my “Twitter time” to Tehran time, or anything like that, because Twitter will not liberate anybody. In fact there is only one thing less helpful to freedom-seeking Iranians than Twitter, and that is political cartoons about Twitter. MORE »

• CNBC Jamaican Financial Psychic Jim Cramer just wants to do his televised Tarot reading in peace, but Barack Obama keeps calling in and asking tiresome questions about the future. Enough already! [Think Progress]
• There is Andrew Sullivan, Heir of Isildur, who hails from the faraway Atlantic. And then there is Anonymous, your teenage son, who comes from the Basement. They are part of the Fellowship of the Internet, and they must stop Sauron from stealing the election in Iran. [AMERICAblog]
• You look stressed. Why don’t you light a few candles, hop in the tub and relax to the celebrated album Whale Sounds and Michelle Malkin? The first track — “Closing Guantanamo is the easy and lazy thing to do” — always puts us in a magical Enya-like trance. [Michelle Malkin]
• For today’s RedState Bible Study we will be reading 1 Kings 3:16-28, The Judgement of King Obama: “And two women appeared before Obama and began to bicker in a most incommodious manner, both insisting they were the mother of some unborn baby, which wise King Obama knew was impossible. Finally, the King rose from his gilded throne and bellowed, ‘Bring the unborn child to me, so that I may abort it with my sword.’ And then King Obama swatted a fly that landed on his arm. The End.” [RedState]

Nancy Pelosi sweeps from the upper right corner in stealth and drops seven buckets of napalm on Pete Hoekstra, a martyr. But just before Pete passes, as the fire consumes his eyes, he grabs Texas Rep. John Culberson by his tattered lapels. “I… I want you to take this back, to my family,” Hoekstra whispers to Culberson — his comrade, his Brother — and hands him a BlackBerry. “It is… locked… you have to press… star + send… what?… no no no…. ’send,’ I said… the little green telephone button… no, you have to press… press them simultaneously… there you go… now you must Twitt…” He dies. But Culberson knows. [Twitter]