Tag: iphones

And on the seventh day, God created unlimited data...

Apple: Great Sweatshop Or Greatest Sweatshop?

Apple Corp - We love you so much we just sent another sext to the icloud to thank you for your courageous stand against the U.S. government. In case you haven't been paying attention or don't have any obnoxious...
Who would Jesus punch first?

Unladylike Republican Staffers Bar-Fighting Like Common Palins

When young male Republican campaign staffers get together, a few things are always present. 1. Lots of boys who came from Republican homes who were raised with the smug certainty that they are SO MUCH SMARTER AND MANLIER than those...
HERE IS SOME SEX ADVICE, YOU GUYS.

Rush Limbaugh Mad Teenage Boys Don’t Put Out Like They Used To

Yesterday, Grandma Kaili told you Wonkers about a new CDC study that says Kids These Days are real fuckin' boring, in that they don't go under the bleachers at school and play sex games on each other, and they...

John McCain: Poker? He Doesn’t Even … Oh Never Mind

Remember that time John McCain went on all the teevees to yell about how we really needed to be having some very important classified meetings about BENGHAZI!!!!11!!1, at the exact same time some very important classified meetings about BENGHAZI!!!!!11!!1...

Hot Breaking Chuck Grassley Twitter Telephone Action

Sen. Chuck Grassley h s an iphone, you guys.

Sensitive Obama Bans Reporter Who Took Embarrassing Video of Him

Remember this? Well somebody must have turned very red! And then he got a little angry: White House officials have banished one of the best political reporters in the country from the approved pool of journalists covering presidential visits to...

God-Fearing Gay-Curing iPhone App Destroyed By Homosexual Radicals

Well, well, well, you say, look who's rolling up into the Wonkette like he never left!  That is right, it is your Reporter of the Homosexual Menace, who has been frankly quite busy lately with his full-time gig at...

Cellphone Shaman Will Help GOP Candidate Become Governor

Hawaii's Republican gubernatorial candidate, James "Duke" Aiona, has a lot going for him: a cool nickname, cool hair, good looks, and years of experience as Hawaii's lieutenant governor on his resume. But his biggest advantage against ... whoever he's...

Where Is Your Sippy Cup Solidarity, America?

Here is today's obligatory "No Muslim Churches at Ground Zero" thing. It brings up a lot of great points (i.e. 9/11) so make sure you read it in its entirety. Governor Paterson vetoed important sippy cup legislation. What...

Heroic U.S. Gov’t Allows Nerds To Void Their iPhone Warranty

Remember when the Obama Administration was going to undo all the attacks on civil liberties that were perpetrated under the Bush Administration? Guantanamo shut down, DOMA repealed, no more secret prisons or eavesdropping, etc. None of that...

Levi Johnston Is Now a Puppet For the Palins, Important News Blog MercedeJohnston.com Reports

Hours ago, it was revealed that Levi Johnston, who is BACK ON with Trig or Tapper or whichever Palin he made a baby with, now says that some things he said in the past about the Palins are not...