iowa

Noted animal-hater and all-around waste-of-space Teabagging Congresstwit Steve King (R-4th Level of Hell) has once again opened his maggot-filled cockholster. He wants you to know that the only reason that Supreme Leader and Great Sun of Socialism Barack H. Obummer got elected was because of all the damn messicans. And whose fault is it that you can’t [...]

In the race to the bottom of the barrel of the laboratories of democracy, Iowa is making a very very strong showing. Sure, competition is tough when you’ve got to worry about the state legislatures in Tennessee, Missouri, Virginia, and other places that urban elitists like yr Wonkette do not wish to visit. But then [...]

Iowa state Representative Ted Gassman is worried. Since his daughter and her husband got divorced, will his granddaughter turn into a whore? End no-fault divorce, Iowa! Keep Ted Gassman’s 16-year-old granddaughter from sluttin’ it up, with her hormones and the promiscuity and whatever else Ted Gassman wanted to muse about, out loud, in public, to [...]

You were once just two little cells, floating around in goo inside some disgusting lady who probably just had sex. But even back then you were still a complete human being, according to state representative Tom Shaw, one of nine Iowa Republicans who introduced a law that would make the destruction of a zygote subject [...]

Rep. Steve King (R-Red Dawn) has a new grievance against gun-registration proposals: They would ruin his family’s Christmas. Speaking to the birther conspiracy site World Net Daily, King castigated Democratic proposals in the wake of the Sandy Hook school massacre. “And I look at the President’s argument on background checks. That would mean that every [...]

We have a feeling that maybe this one is not going to hold up on appeal, just maybe, but who knows? The Iowa Supreme Court has decided that … you know, folks, really, maybe if you’re holding something that you might break your computer with, you should put it down … so they decided that [...]

Mitt Romney is the current GOP nominee for president, which means that, for the next six days, he’s the head of the Republican party. We’re pretty sure that’s in the Constitution? Anyway, in the wake of the hurricane that’s crippled New York City (and also exiled Your Wonkette to Tumblr, even though Tumblr is based [...]

Oh Charlene Idelle Hunziker, 47, of Council Bluffs, Iowa, gurrrrl, don’t you ever change! First, a liquid lunch at PF Chang’s, where you harass all the customers about NOBAMA being a Muslin; second, embarrass your daughter so much that she leaves you down in Chinatown (or at least the West Des Moines version thereof); third, [...]

It is Mitt’s time, and Egg Romney has had about enough of you people sniping and whining and curb-jobbing her husband. “Stop it. This is hard. You want to try it? Get in the ring,” she said. “This is hard and, you know, it’s an important thing that we’re doing right now and it’s an [...]

Rep. Steve King (R-IA) has defended Missouri Senate candidate (for now) Todd Akin by going a step further and claiming that a lady cannot get pregnant from statutory rape or incest either! King supports the “No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act.” It would ban Federal funding of abortions except in cases of forcible rape. Right [...]

John Conyers, how regularly you delight us! (Once, we sat next to the million-term Michigan Democrat at a recording industry handjob event, and could not wait to tell him about how we had read that the stupid TSA, post-9/11, was constantly pulling him out of line because of his bum ticker. “That’s Dingell,” he answered [...]

You guys, we are not even kidding about this. Iowa Rep. Steve King, perhaps feeling a little heat since ThinkProgress pointed out that he actually and for real loves it when people murder puppies, has gone absolutely around the bend. And we mean MORE around the bend than Steve King usually assays. In explaining himself, [...]

You know how it’s awesome to be cruel to animals? And how it is not at all worrisome when adolescents or teenage boys get all horny torturing cute things, and it in no way portends (probably both causally and effectively, as they become desensitized to the pain of others) that they will become mass murderers? [...]

Let’s say you want to be a member of the Iowa Senate, but you decide that actually running for the seat is expensive and tedious, and you realize that even if you win, you’re mostly going to be voting on a lot of boring local issues, probably involving corn. Wouldn’t it be more fun to [...]

The longtime Wonkette reader will know from many perilous exposures to the not-at-all-graphic-and-horrible animal rights ads we carry that chickens in particular are super screwed in this country. So some states, like California, have passed laws saying that starting in 2015, all eggs that come into the state must be from chickens in cages big [...]


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