Obviously, the most erotic thing anyone could possibly imagine would be actually touching the flesh of Sarah Palin, America’s sex goddess. But only Todd gets to do this, because Jesus united them in marriage and now no man or woman may come between their nude, aroused flesh. The closest a non-Todd person could get to […]

The U.S. has convinced its hotheaded friend Israel that it would take Iran a whole year to make a final push for a nuclear weapon, and that everyone would know about it a few weeks into that process; Obama’s top advisor on nuke stuff says “A year is a very long period of time.” Really, […]

Congress likes to spend money. But sometimes they also think, “Wait, do we have any money?” And then they come up with an idea to make themselves a cool $20 or so, and then they get back to spending lots of money. We are witness to one such idea right now. Though they banned it […]

At this point we’re all well acquainted with Nikki Haley, who’s running for the GOP nomination for governor in South Carolina, and who may have had hot sexx affairs with a political blogger (GROSS) and one of her rival’s consultants (at a “school-choice convention in Salt Lake City,” also GROSS). But now her campaign is […]

Michael Steele and his book teevee tour, boy howdy! Here’s another quote to archive: “But that’s what’s gotten us into trouble, when we walked away from principle. Our platform is one of the best political documents that’s been written in the last 25 years. Honest Injun on that.” LEAVE BOBBY JINDAL ALONE! (Second sentence is […]

Some 400 years ago the Pilgrims and Indians dined together to celebrate a bountiful harvest, and then the nice Pilgrims gave the Indians smallpox blankets and killed just about all of them. To commemorate this glorious occurrence in our nation’s history, we get the Thanksgiving holiday, and if you’re sticking around and braving a visit […]

It was not easy getting to this Inaugural Parade late in the day, yesterday, what with the monstrous piles of trash and dead bodies and fences seemingly blocking all pedestrian paths. But we did it for you, the dear reader, and stayed for like a whole five minutes before getting cold and running away forever. […]

This is the Bondage Room in one of John McCain’s nine homes (seriously, NINE), this one in Phoenix. Lucky Architectural Digest did a whole tour of the house and you can view their slide show here. Now it’s quite possible that John McCain has never been inside his Phoenix home, and who can blame him? […]

NEVER FORGET  4:17 pm July 25, 2008

by Ken Layne

SINGLE TEAR SHED ON ROADSIDE: “Colorado Tribes Perform Native American Blessing To Mark One Month Until The 2008 Democratic National Convention.” [DNCC]

TOP  10:26 am May 20, 2008

Did The Indians Hex Barack Obama?

by Jim Newell

CONGRESS  10:07 am June 9, 2006

The Great American Pastime

by Alex Pareene