Ever had an old person walk up to you on the street and ask you a completely bizarre question, like, “Why do all the apples send moonbeams into your brain?” No? Well, doesn’t happen to us either. But at a Senate hearing yesterday, David Cohen, undersecretary of treasury for terrorism and financial intelligence, was testifying […]

South Bend, Indiana, City Councilman Henry Davis, Jr. just wanted to spark public debate about a matter of national policy that he was very concerned about, which is why he posted an “explicit photograph of a man and a dog” on his Facebook page Sunday, to call attention to a very important but nonexistent issue: […]

Another day, another “gun nut shoots self but hey guns are totally cool and safe” day, which is now all days ending in “y.” Freedumb! What have we got in the ol’ virtual mailbag today? Looks like some road rage self-perforation and some cop shoots himself good times. How do we possibly choose which one […]

As we all know, Jesus doesn’t want big government feeding people, because some of the hungry might be bad people, and also because it gets in the way of people expressing their love for Jesus by volunteering on their own to feed people. And as anyone knows, we don’t need no stinkin’ government, because private […]

Happy Gayvember, everyone! How is the Pentagon defying G_d today? Per Stars and Stripes: Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel on Thursday sharply criticized U.S. states that are defying the Pentagon by refusing to allow National Guard facilities to issue ID cards that enable same-sex spouses of military members to claim benefits. “This is wrong,” Hagel said […]

We are starting to think that maybe school safety demonstrations are not healthy for children, especially this “Red Ribbon Week” thing that’s supposed to scare them away from drugs. In California and Indiana, some exceptionally well-thought-out combinations of law enforcement and little kids didn’t go so great. On the upside, the kids at those schools […]

In a brave defense of the Constitution’s guarantee that people should pay the highest possible price for heath insurance (it’s in there, right next to the right to shoot tyrants), Indiana Attorney General Greg Zoeller filed suit last week against the IRS to prevent it from funding insurance subsidies under the Affordable Care Act. Zoeller […]

A firefighter in Evansville, Indiana, was nearly tased in the face Tuesday after police misinterpreted his friendly wave as giving them the finger. George Madison Jr. was riding his bicycle when a police car made a sudden left turn in front of him at an intersection. He says he raised his hand to wave because […]

Those of you Wonketeers who work at or have attended a “poorly performing” public school surely know that one does not have to suffer the consequences of poor performance — consequences that include replacing the principal, laying off teachers, losing tax revenue, or closing the school entirely. No, one does not have to suffer the […]

The few times we ever gave former Indiana Governor Mitch Daniels much thought, he always seemed like a Scott Walker wannabe who was trying to prove that he too could destroy public employee unions and pass “right to work” and just generally be terrible. The biggest difference between them seemed to be that Scott Walker never lost […]

You know what is all kinds of fucked up and wrong and evil and worse than Hitler? No, not Obamacare. Or birth control. Or Mitch McConnell’s office getting bugged. Sit down, Republicans, we said not Obamacare. No, the correct answer is: harassing a 13-year-old girl who was raped and impregnated by her rapist. Like so: “I […]

How are liberals winning the battle against the Fetal Menace today? Probably a lot of ways, but especially this: The State of Indiana will not be allowed to withhold Medicaid funding from Planned Parenthood! Says who, you ask? The Supreme Court, that’s who! (Actually they didn’t “say” anything, they just coldly and disdainfully “declined” to […]

Is our children learning? Sure they are, kind of! Maybe! Well, who knows, it is tough to say! But is our children learning from and around people who have health care coverage and are thus not in danger of infecting them with disease? No, of course not, don’t be silly, this is too much to […]

A crime against the hallowed Second Amendment has thankfully been averted, hooray! Several gentlemen armed with freedom guns filled with liberty bullets have convinced some mothers rallying for stupid Nazi shit like background checks and clip limits never to attempt to assemble or attempt to regulate their well-regulated militias, ever again! Sorry, Indiana Commies of […]

You’ve heard of RU-486, right? It’s that pill women can take that induces an abortion without anyone having to perform surgery. It’s way safer than surgical abortion (and pregnancy), and it doesn’t require any fancy surgical rooms to administer. It’s a good way to make abortions available in places where surgical ones, for whatever reason, […]