HE BELONGS TO THE ‘RE-ELECT MAYOR BLOOMBERG’ PARTY, OF COURSE: Nobody in New York knows which political party the chameleon plutocrat Michael Bloomberg belongs to, perhaps because he has slutted around with every party short of the LaRouchies. At various points Mayor Bloomberg has been registered as a Democrat and then as a Republican; these days he votes as a proud Green Party Communist Lesbian Furry, which is to say, an “independent.” [City Room]

Once upon a time, Joe Lieberman nearly ruined Barack Obama’s career forever by going to the Republican National Convention and calling him a “young man” repeatedly while Obama was busy trying to win a campaign against an ancient War God and his evil, fecund snow mistress. Obama prevailed, of course, but since then everybody has hated Joe Lieberman’s guts even more than they used to. MORE »

Ah, snap polls. Here is how they work: A news-gathering organization rounds up a bunch of plumbers, all named Joe, and puts them in a lockbox where they are forced to look at two people arguing for 90 minutes. At the end of this torture session, people ask themselves, “Who blinked less? I’ll go with that guy,” and voila, you have your snap poll telling you Barack Obama won again. MORE »

Everyone To Ralph Nader: PISS OFF AND NOW Ralph Nader, our lovable Ay-rab independent presidential candidate (who was a long-time friend of Israel-stone-throwing-at academic Edward Said), is now hated by absolutely everyone, but especially the people who worked for his last campaign. All his old seatbelt-loving, tree-hugging, corporation-despising non-profit pals want nothing to do with him and his plans to ease our Lord and Savior John McCain into the Oval Office. Why will Nader not understand that non-Republicans need to make a not-difficult choice between two nearly identical candidates, one or both of whom will go on to serve as a ball of string for John “Big Angry War Cat” McCain later this year? Old fool. [The New Republic]

Even though Barack Obama took New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg out to breakfast a few months ago, gave a big fancy speech about Alexander Hamilton in Bloomberg’s back yard, and not-so-subtly hinted that he would appreciate at least a steak dinner in exchange for the reacharound, Bloomberg still refuses to go steady with Obama. MORE »

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