December 13, 2013
Senator Rand Paul picked up his son shortly thereafter. [TwentyFourEightTV]
When former (Republican) senator Lamar Alexander quoted Alex Haley, the author of Roots, at the Inauguration yesterday, Breitbart-remnant writer John Nolte knew exactly what was called for! You see, Alexander was a close friend of Haley (despite being a Republican — weird, right?), and invoked the late writer while introducing Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor: [...]
Here is a photo of Joe Biden getting out of his limousine, looking like a Boss (in point of fact, he is only the boss of the Senate). Sunglasses are a very good look for the VP, whose official Wonkette title is now Old Handsome Joe Biden, God Love Him. (By the end of his [...]
So we hear that there was some sort of widely-watched event today that did not involve sports! Above, we have Tweetosphere messages from three people who seem not to understand that everyone can see them saying stuff, and that retweets can be directed to @SecretService (as all of these were, for whatever good it does). [...]
Inauguration scandal! Obama is eating lunch today, and it is not half a grapefruit, with water and a side of sprouts! From the Washington Times, covering Their Watergate: The ceremonial lunch President Obama and his former congressional colleagues are eating Monday tops out at 3,000 calories, according to a website that has tallied up the [...]
Sorry, Barker’s Beauties and the teevee viewers who love them, looks like your ass got pre-empted again! Will Barack Hussein Obama’s tyrannies never end? (Spoiler: no!) The rest of you, who for some reason are NOT outraged that your usual morning television viewing has been replaced with unending tracking shots of Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter [...]
Well this is a fine how do you do! The cast of Glee, which turns teenagers gay, will be performing at some innig inaugural balls alongside such nobodies as Brad Paisley and Alicia Keys, even though they stole their Baby Got Back arrangement from this guy, who stole it fair and square from Dynamite Hack! [...]
This is serious. Not only can Barack Obama control the weather, but now — like a Roman emperor, or “czar,” he controls the calendar too.
Presumptive Republican presidential nominee and man-shaped pile of hair gel Mitt Romney needs some more scratch, fellows, and so his surrogates are passing around a nifty Kickstarter-style menu of fabulous prizes you could get if you had 50,000 clams that for some weird reason you did not need for shelter, food, or four months worth [...]
Hey if your Verizon phone and the people responsible for its maintenance have been terrorizing you logistically and emotionally, you just earned Ten Recession Dollars. [WTOP]
One thing Republicans like to do is send racist shit to each other, whether funny black-face minstrel songs about the “magic negro” (the president) or funny newsletters about the watermelon and fried chicken certain black people (the president) always consume, or especially funny racist jokes about how black people are so lazy but they sho’ [...]
If you were denied your basic human right to attend the Inauguration thanks to “severe logistical breakdowns,” you could be eligible to receive a photo of all the fun you missed on Barry’s special day! [DCist] Hey listen up hippies: your all-natural trail mix has diseases. [WTOP] Jill, Michelle and Fentys Adrian and “his wife” [...]
What, exactly, has White House photographer Pete Souza captured in this shot? Maybe it’s after the last of the 10 dances at 10 inaugural balls. White tie, who even approved that? Anyway, here is your new president, handsome and smiling some 12 hours after he took the (first) oath of office.
AMERICA’S NEW CAPITAL: “Like most everyone in D.C., I haven’t exactly been following the news since Tuesday. When you’re having sushi and champagne for breakfast, with Beyonce, you’re not really going to be checking up on Wolf Blitzer or Andrew Sullivan or whatever.” [AOL Political Machine]
In-the-tank National Park Service is reporting that 1.8 million people attended Barry’s Inauguration, but some people think the real number was closer to 1 million, meaning Obama is not even technically President. [DC Examiner] Fannie Mae is laying off hundreds of people, most of whom live and work — well, used to anyway — in [...]