Anyone who has ever been on an Amtrak train—especially during rush hour or the onset of holiday weekends—knows how much better things would be aboard that train if passengers were allowed to bring guns on it. Any and all conflicts would be basically pre-solved, because whoever wins is just whoever has a gun, see? Anyway, Congress is all for it, and they are willing to withhold $1.5 billion in funding from Amtrak—or shoot Amtrak with a gun concealed in its messenger bag—unless this is allowed by April. MORE »