Tag Archives: important announcements

  a dimension of sight

Now Entering Wonkville, Population You!

Dear Wonkville Forums: I never thought it would happen to me! Hey what’s that new thing over to the right? The thing that looks like the picture in this post. Oh, you don’t see it in the right sidebar? It’s right above the box where you can buy anything you like on Amazon, and Mama gets her cut. Try refreshing. Try refreshing again. You know what, just open a new browser. There! That is Wonkville, and it is where you will spend the rest of your natural life, mining stories in the story mine. Read more on Now Entering Wonkville, Population You!…
  This meetup will NOT be sold to Oklahoma City

Unofficial Seattle Wonkette Meetup Saturday 6/30: Toast The ACA, Mourn The Public Option

Remember, Wonketteers in Oregon, Washington and even one or two of you freaks from Idaho: This is the weekend for the Decidedly Unofficial Seattle Gathering of the Wonkalos, and if enough people show up, we promise to never again use that term! The shindig will be Saturday June 30 starting at 6:30 PM at Latona Pub in beautiful Seattle. Read more on Unofficial Seattle Wonkette Meetup Saturday 6/30: Toast The ACA, Mourn The Public Option…
  Just don't wear flannel

Dry Your Eyes Seattle: Here Is Your Unofficial Get-Together!

Perpetually damp Wonketteers from across the Northwest chunk of the nation will gather Saturday, June 30 starting at 6:30 PM at Latona Pub in verdant Seattle WA. The Wonkette gathering will be in the upstairs loft and pavilion. According to longtime reader and meetup organizer Weejee, the location also features “Green Lake 2 blocks away for post fest skinny dipping (don’t need no stinkin’ pool).” Be prepared to pay your own bail. Read more on Dry Your Eyes Seattle: Here Is Your Unofficial Get-Together!…
  and begging

Your Wonket Drinky Thing Non-Kickstarter Update (Behold Your New Prizes)

Well you little sweetling lover liver lumps! You have already sent almost $2000 for beer and shit for our nationwide tour of dive bars, to see you, our beloved Wonkers! Frankly? For some of you it seemed like it might have come a little too easy. We are not talking about our $10s or $25s. We imagine you are decent middle-class and working-class folk eking out a modest living and charitably sending off some hard-won scratch. But you with your hundreds and couple-hundreds and so forth, if you could peel off a couple of Benjies as fast as you did, then you are MITT ROMNEY, and just lucky we haven’t come after you with (clean-burning) torches. Read more on Your Wonket Drinky Thing Non-Kickstarter Update (Behold Your New Prizes)…
  yay

Announcement: Live-Blogging Of Ye Olde Delaware Primarye To Commence Sometime Maybe

Howdy, pardners! Kirsten Boyd Johnston and other special guests (me) will be OCCUPYing THE TELEVISION to relate to you some things what are said thereon, about this, the 412th electoral contest of the Republican primary season! We will be doing this maybe at like 8 p.m. Eastern, WHO EVEN KNOWS? Mitt Romney will probably say something weird and uncomfortable and smack his lips too loud when he talks which is not any more offputting than anything else he does, and Newt Gingrich will definitely ramble on like a jackal with herpes because nobody is allowed to use teleprompterz anymore because they are Of Satan, and probably, like, Chris Matthews will say some shit too. Oh, what a time we shall have, with only each other and sweet healing booze for solace in this, the most boring fucking primary we have ever witnessed. Get your liquor cabinet at the ready, and check back, for larfs and pain! Read more on Announcement: Live-Blogging Of Ye Olde Delaware Primarye To Commence Sometime Maybe…
 

RON PAUL WILL MEET HIS WATERLOO AT THE MEAUX FAMILY’S CRAWFISH BOIL TONIGHT: Pay no attention to the disastrous poll results released today. American hero and CPA Chris Peden will win Texas Congressional District 14 in a landslide as long as everyone attends this vital get-out-the-vote/crawfish-boiling effort in Stowell, Texas. [Chris Peden For Congress] Read more on …