idiots

There were not quite one million veterans at the World War II Memorial on Sunday morning. When your correspondent arrived at 8:30, having already passed a cluster of Oath Keepers staging on the Starbucks patio at 18th and I, about five hundred people were peaceably assembled in the open space of the memorial. Whatever violence […]

Conspiracy freak and spokesman for the reality-challenged American community Alex Jones wants you to know that he bears no ill will toward the blacks, even though he says he’s been “racially attacked” by them roughly eleventy-jillion times. “I’ve been racially attacked by black people, probably — let’s not exaggerate — thirty-five times?” Jones said. “I’ve […]

O hai TEXAS! What are you doing? Just cold illustratin’ this list of gun “facts,” as sent around to all his colleagues by New Hampshire Brain Genius Rep. Gary Hopper? Sounds like hard work. You keep bein’ you. So, okay. Nice cans, illustrating some New Hampshire representative’s very well-thought-out gun stuff. But the ENTIRE EMAIL […]

An 18 year old airline passenger is suing the pants off United Airlines after a flight crew took no action on her repeated complaints about a disgusting passenger who was “masturbating and exposing his penis” for “long periods” on a six-hour flight last October. Monica Amestoy, who was 17 at the time, is seeking damages […]

Oh Southern Dems. First you shoot your own fool faces off by being SUPER FUCKING RACIST about Mitch McConnell’s Taiwan-born wife, Elaine Chao, who’s enough of an asshole that you DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE TO BRING HER ASIANNESS INTO IT. Well, now the chair of the South Carolina Democratic Party has said an idiot SUPER FUCKING […]

After we received a delightful phoney-baloney legal threat from Expert Showman Bradlee Dean’s assistant lickspittle, just because we supposably “defamed” Dean by directly quoting him, we asked you, the Wonkettariat, to show us your fauxto chops and serve us up some manipulated images, for Comedy! We also asked you to prepare us some lawyerly replies […]

Hey, remember today? When we got that hilares letter informing us that we better, like, say sorry or something, and DEFINITELY take down all that libel-y stuff about one Mr. Herr Doktor Bradlee Dean? Well, some of you asked for a Photoshop contest, but we will do you one better! Since so many Wonkerados are […]

Hey, did you guys hear this not at all completely hypothetical and fictional and made up (that is what “fictional” means) story about how Barack Obama is personally going to tear down Ronald Reagan’s childhood home with his bare black hands? So he can put his presidential library on it? Why would he even need […]

Hey, Colin Powell, you are a black Republican. What do you think of people in your party who are constantly not being racist with their watermelon emails and their funny nose-bone witch-doctor shirts? Oh, you are against it? Perhaps you would like to CALL SOME PEOPLE OUT, BY THEIR NAMES, STARTING WITH SARAH PALIN? Please […]

So, we mentioned a little earlier today that an Illinois elementary school had a sheriff’s deputy assigned to guard it after a parent “complained children weren’t reciting the Pledge of Allegiance correctly,” right? So, please join us in doing a bad Paul Harvey imitation as Wonkette presents The Rest Of The Story. Yes, you DO […]

The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gun, explained NRA strongman Wayne LaPierre earlier this month, is a good guy with a gun. But what can stop a moron with a gun? The answer is a moron will stop himself. With his own gun!

Here is something that the Internet went and puked up on our digital doorstep a few days back: a collection of Microsoft Office-based editorial artwork designed to provide inspiration and motivation to “The Manosphere.” And what is the “Manosphere?” We’ll let the anti-MRA blog Manboobz do the ‘splainin: The Manosphere: The loose collection of blogs, […]

Joe Scarborough, who hosts MSNBC’s morning show because the rest of MSNBC’s Obama food stamp-loving libtard talent don’t wake from their welfare-funded fortified wine benders until well after noon, is really, really sorry he conflated Nate Silver with that unwashed hillbilly “unskewed polls” guy. And by really, really sorry, we mean he’s not sorry at […]

Fox News once again hired ruddy shitmonster Frank Luntz to convene a panel of undecided voters who watch Fox News (read: Romney voters who want to be on Fox News). There is video (as the kids are saying, “after the fold”). Fox Nation describes this as “Luntz Focus Group Erupts Into Near Brawl,” but it […]

Here is Andrea Tantaros, one of the however-many hosts of Fox News’ The Five, showing a chart of the historically horrid unemployment rates for the 18-24 year old demographic and proceeding to make one of those savvy counterintuitive arguments that earn her the big bucks: “I’ve argued once that maybe the economic downturn was the […]