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Posts Tagged ‘idaho’

LET'S GIT 'EM

This Idaho Governor Candidate & His Buddies Will Hunt Obama

Friday, August 28th, 2009

Idaho is nuts! “[Idaho Gov. caniddate Rex] Rammell was speaking to a local Republican group about the state’s wolf hunt, for which hunters must pay for ‘wolf tags.’ An audience member shouted out a question about ‘Obama tags.’ ‘Obama tags? We’d buy some of those,’ Rammell responded.” Haw haw haw. Even more haw-haws on the Twitter, just this afternoon! The longer he drags this out without apologizing, the more likely he is to win a Republican primary in Idaho. [TPM]


BATHROOM GOBLIN'S NEW BEGINNING

Larry Craig Opens Consulting Firm

Tuesday, July 28th, 2009

He knows all about mining.According to “Wonkett” bylaws, everything Larry Craig does is 30% funnier by virtue of the fact that it was done by Larry Craig, the winsome bathroom goblin who repeatedly tried to appeal his own guilty plea after he was arrested in a “cruisy toilet” looking for a hot slice of man to get down with. The former senator has opened a consulting firm and has four whole clients! How much would you pay for his professional advice? MORE »


NOT INVITED

Thursday, March 12th, 2009

Do not fear the pork.WHY DOES JOE BIDEN HATE IDAHO SO MUCH? “Vice President Biden hosted officials from every state but Idaho for a conference today designed to serve as a workshop and warning on how they should use their billions of dollars from the stimulus package.” Is Idaho not receiving any stimulus money, or are they boycotting Pork President Biden’s Porkulous Guide to Porkery? Suspicious. [Washington Post]


REPUBLICANS IN THE NEWS

Gay Larry Craig Gives Up Fighting Gay Cruising Conviction

Thursday, January 8th, 2009

Cocksucker.Idaho bathroom goblin Larry Craig is out of the Senate and (sort of) out of the closet. The notorious homosexual Republican will no longer fight his conviction for “disorderly conduct” in a Minneapolis airport men’s room, where he was cruising a notorious “cruisy toilet” for gay bathroom sex with a man, who turned out to be an on-duty cop conducting a “sting operation against men cruising for gay sex.” MORE »


GOP IN THE NEWS

Nobody Wants To See Gay Larry Craig’s Gay Airport Bathroom Now

Monday, December 29th, 2008

Larry Craig is a terrible closeted homosexual and right-wing Idaho “Super Tuber” who was also a loathsome crooked senator who would basically do whatever the land rapists asked, as long as he could keep up the bathroom ass-fucking/sucking. He was America’s Greatest Hero and the symbol of the Republican Party. But now nobody wants to see the tawdry public toilet at the Minneapolis airport where he was last caught plying his particular rough trade. MORE »


VULGAR SEX CRIMINALS

Larry Craig Latest Sex-Scandal Republican To Lose Legal Appeal

Tuesday, December 9th, 2008

I WANTS TO SEX YOUJust a day after fellow bathroom goblin Bob “Twenty Dollar” Allen failed yet again in his own absurd quest to expunge all hints of gayness from his police record, the original Idaho toilet troll Larry Craig lost his most recent appeal. Craig was arrested for trying to pick up a cop in a Minneapolis airport men’s room, blah blah blah, and ever since he has been trying to convince legal authorities that he just has a “wide stance” when he urinates in a very heterosexual manner in public restrooms. MORE »


BOY HOWDY

Country Music Star Tries To Pick Up Sarah Palin

Monday, October 13th, 2008

The scene: John McCain, Sarah Palin, a NASCAR venue, in the capital of the Confederacy, tens of thousands of hardcore Republicans, a performance by country hobo Hank Williams Jr. If your skin had higher melanin levels than, say, Bob Barr’s, THIS WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN A SAFE DAY TRIP. Otherwise, it seemed to be a pleasant affair today in Richmond. Williams sung a delightful song for Sarah Palin about how she is a woman. The lyrics included, “How can you be so smart and be such a good lookin’ dish?” ABC News adds, “The song compares Palin to a ‘momma bear in Idaho’ protecting her cubs, ready to protect America.” The senior senator from Idaho, in contrast, does not favor bears in Idaho protecting themselves. [ABC News]


IMPORTANT LEGAL BATTLES OF OUR TIME

Larry Craig’s Lawyers Back In Court, Wasting Everyone’s Time

Wednesday, September 10th, 2008

Ahh, it’s nice to see America’s Lawyer Class bravely challenging the fascist state’s overreach with a devastating reach-around of its own: “An attorney for U.S. Sen. Larry Craig told a Minnesota appeals court Wednesday that the lawmaker should be able to withdraw his guilty plea to a charge stemming from a gay sex sting arrest because there’s not enough evidence he did anything illegal.” Can you imagine being this attorney for U.S. Sen. Larry Craig? Obviously he knows that his client sucks more cock on any given trip to the airport than a large group of evangelical preachers does on a three-week sojourn to Thailand for “missionary work.” And yet there he is, in court today, trying to overturn a minor GUILTY PLEA for a lame-duck gay clown. [Idaho Statesman]


O RLY?

GOP Congressman: There Are 40 Barrels Of Oil In Every Tree

Friday, August 15th, 2008

And the light of his mind was a comfort to ships lost at sea Idaho Congressman Bill Sali has been participating in the current GOP Cuddle Party For Oil. But no one will listen to him even though he knows everything! In fact, he could solve the entire energy crisis in one hot minute if people paid any damn attention, because he knows that there “could be up to 40 barrels of oil” in a single tree. Ha ha, look at what you’ve really been hugging all these years, you filthy liberal hippies: a filthy casket of crude oil. Unless somehow Sali doesn’t know what he’s talking about? MORE »


CAMPAIGN COLLECTIBLES

Best Ticket Ever: Obama/Craig ‘08

Monday, July 28th, 2008

Where's Serolf Divad when you need him?So there is this Democratic paraphernalia vendor called Tigerye Design, and they sell buttons and other crap. One such button, briefly available for purchase on their site, showed Barack Obama and Idaho Bathroom Goblin Larry Craig instead of Obama and Idaho Senatorial candidate Larry LaRocco. So until the vendor pulled it, a button was available that showed the guy who even straight dudes want to do and the straight guy who wants to do dudes. Prediction: this button will retail on eBay for fifteen thousand whore diamonds. [AP]


HOMOSEXUALS

Larry Craig Wants To Jerk Your Gas Nozzle

Thursday, July 17th, 2008

Here’s Idaho Senior Senator Larry Craig describing a handjob he gave Hugo Chavez gayly saying we can’t let foreign dictators “jerk us around by the gas nozzle” doing both of the things we’ve crossed out. Note the flailing hands. [TPM]