Tag: hurricanes

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Rush Limbaugh Pretty Sure Liberals Can’t Wait For Hurricane Matthew To Kill Everybody

How can we keep our 'climate change' conspiracy going if big hurricanes don't murder everybody all the time?

God Cancels Hurricane Joaquin, Endorses Buttsex

So you know how all weather is a sign that God is MAD, BRO, at the liberal heathens? That's why He mostly sends revenge weather to the bluest of blue states, like Kansas and Florida and Louisiana and Texas. Last...
Obama probably shouldn't mention weather either.

Bobby Jindal Begs Obama Not To Say Dumb Climate Change Stuff On Katrina Anniversary

Big anniversary happening on Saturday! Ten years ago, Hurricane Katrina made landfall in Louisiana, and the storm and the levee breaches it caused altered the course of history for New Orleans and surrounding areas. And, as governor of Louisiana,...
Obama probably shouldn't mention weather either.

Lady Writer Wishes Hurricane Katrina Would Destroy Chicago, Is That Mean?

Hey, remember Hurricane Katrina? It was ten years ago, almost! It was devastating. The final death count was 1,836 in Louisiana and Mississippi, and over half of them were elderly. Eighty percent of the city of New Orleans was...

Donald Trump Knows Climate Change Is Just Classy, Luxurious Version Of Weather

Donald Trump would build a YOOOOOOOGE fence around climate change, if it even existed:“The real climate change is going to be nuclear climate change if we’re not smart and tough and very, very careful because that’s a big danger...
love the audience reaction here

Florida State Senators Taunt Emergency Chief: You Ain’t Allowed To Say ‘Climate Change’!

Florida's Senate had entirely too much fun taunting Gov. Rick Scott's head of emergency management last week, trying to get Bryan Koon to say the words "climate change," which, as we all know, is a Banned Word of Power...
No Disaster Preparedness Funds for you!

FEMA To States: You Want Cash? Say Climate Change Is Real. SAY IT!

In an elegant reply to politicians who aren't scientists but don't mind ignoring experts who are, the Federal Emergency Management Agency has come up with a simple solution: States whose governors decide there's no need to plan for the...

Science Spotlight: Maybe If They Named The Lady Hurricanes ‘Lorena’

Researchers at the University of Illinois released a study that suggests that people are just plain sexist when it comes to hurricanes: Hurricanes with feminine names may kill three times as many victims because people do not perceive them as...

Wingnuts And The Crazy Things They Said About Science: Let Us Review 2013 And Weep For The Planet

The end of another year is upon us, worthly Wonkette scum. Another year in the books of us reading terrible things about terrible people and then writing about them in joke form for your entertainment, if one can call...

A Children’s Treasury of CEOs Throwing Very Grown-Up Tantrums Over Obamacare

If we were the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company, we would happily make ten cents less per unit in order to make sure that our employees have health care coverage. This would be DOUBLY true if we were...

Cool Republican Bro Had Fun Spreading Dumb Fake Hurricane Rumors Last Night

Good morning, New Yorkers! We hope that you are reading these words right now, because that means you have power and Internet access and probably are in your own home, which we sincerely hope is not soggy and...

God Due To ‘Stand His Ground’ Against Tampa’s Republican Convention, With Hurricane Maybe

Everybody panic! Some dude at Examiner.com looked at a bunch of funny gifs of a maybe-hurricane and decided it might hit Tampa (and your Editrix!) just in time for the RNC! Where will we shelter from the possible storm?...

Louisiana: Wikipedia Pages Prank; Lobbyist: Wonkette Has No Ethics

Tuesday, while your Wonkette was working to bring the world "important" hilarious news about the pathetic Sarah Palin "Lou Sarah" account, we also threw up an account of somebody visiting the Louisiana Capitol building and finding a statue of...

Financial Regulation To Pass … Now? Now? How About Now?

Financial regulation was dead yesterday, but today it is alive again, just like Jesus! And speaking of things or people who are like Jesus, we have Scott Brown to thank for this turn of events. All Barney...

Mean Old Hurricane Bill Trying To Kill Obama

The festering hot death-waters of the tropical south Atlantic Ocean are trying, as is their annual ritual, to kill the humans with their hurricanes. And this one, Hurricane Bill, is a real heifer. Category 4! According to this important...