Wonkette

Why does Barack Obama hate the nation’s hard-working comedians, satirists and cartoonists? That’s the important question teevee-industry reporter Bill Carter is asking today, in a New York Times piece complaining that nobody can make fun of Hopey because of hope, change, and racial transcendence. Yet the rednecks and racists are free to peck out their ALL CAPS emails and blog comments about how Barack Hussein Osama and his wife Angela Davis the Black Terrorist will turn America into some unimaginable place where black people aren’t slaves. MORE »

Just a few short months ago John McCain and Mitt Romney were sworn mortal enemies, and McCain seized every opportunity to humiliate his pantywaist rival in public. And it worked! Mitt Romney had to drop out of the race after a series of excruciatingly embarrassing losses proved the only people who actually wanted a President Romney were his admittedly massive extended family. But now he’s campaigning for John McCain, who still makes fun of him! MORE »

We haven’t paid much attention to the primary challenge against moderate Republican Senator Lincoln Chafee — mostly because, for reasons known only to Marc Ambinder and Mark Halperin, it has not become the media clusterfuck that was the Lamont v. Lieberman debacle — but we learned in a “Rhode Island” “newspaper” (how cute!) today all about Chafee’s right-wing challenger, Stephen P. Laffey (pictured right: Laffey’s son sporting Soviet iconography).

As a student at Bowdoin College a generation ago, Cranston Mayor Stephen P. Laffey wrote humor columns for a campus newspaper that even he now acknowledges could be construed as homophobic.

We think the Providence Journal is a bit confused. Because while said columns could definitely be construed as “homophobic” (”All the homosexuals I’ve seen are sickly and decrepit, their eyes devoid of life.” Has the man never watched The Match Game?), they are not actually “humorous.” None of the quoted lines or the entire column reprinted in an addendum are, in any way, funny. The misunderstanding may have arisen due to Mr. Laffey’s last name, which resembles the common English term for the sound made a person experiencing “humor.” That is really the only explanation for the author’s constant insistence that this was a “humor column.” Buddy, most college humor columns aren’t funny, sure, but they do have jokes in them. Unlike Laffey’s. Don’t take our word for it, either — we’ve reprinted a column after the jump. You’ll find it, on the humor scale, somewhere between Where the Red Fern Grows and Matt Cooper.

Homphobia (also expressed: a desire to break Boy George’s ribs — it is known now that it is much, much funnier to break his spirit) aside, we cannot endorse a candidate in this crucial Senate race until we find some evidence that incumbent Lincoln Chafee is funny.

Laffey Penned Anti-Gay Columns in College [ProJo]

MORE »

President terrified of women, “Washington Whispers” reports… MORE »

We were going to go to the Gridiron Dinner, but it was such a nice night out, we decided to give it a miss and drink on a rooftop instead. Oh, and it turns out bloggers aren’t invited. But we don’t feel too slighted to have missed the dinner, a glorified office Christmas party in which every year they rouse the surviving members of Carson’s writing staff and put them to work retrofitting hundred-year-old punchlines with torn-from-the-headlines topical references. MORE »