Poor Southern hobo and the 2008 GOP primary’s most potent premature ejaculation, Mike Huckabee, first made waves on the national stage when his fat ass lost hundreds of pounds on some kind of “diet-and-exercise” regimen. He wrote a book about this and most people read it several times. Even through the hectic presidential campaign, Huckabee made sure to run his miles every morning, to preserve that sexy mass of dangling excess skin he had worked so tirelessly to create. But now, he claims, he is so busy criticizing Barack Obama that he has fallen off the wagon and will soon weigh millions of pounds again. MORE »