Tag Archives: huffington post

  bomb washington dc

Left-Wing Liberal Blogs To Destroy Sanctity Of White House Pool Reports

The most challenging investigative task a prominent Washington journalist could ever face in his or her career is to cover the White House Pool Report beat, where our greatest reporters take turns following the President during off-hours — just in case anything like a sex affair or juicy “gaffe” happens — and then share the vital journalism information with each other for common use. (This is a form of Communism.) The rotation has traditionally been composed of reporters from the Washington bureaus of the top 30-ish newspapers and magazines, and the average fare usually features three or four muckraking sentences about how a deputy press secretary made a funny joke about another reporter who every reporter knows to have a wacky reputation for the exact thing the deputy press secretary made a joke about… oh you wouldn’t get it, ha ha ha. But this is all over now, due to the recent addition of two left-wing bloggers into the rotation. Read more on Left-Wing Liberal Blogs To Destroy Sanctity Of White House Pool Reports…
  today in brilliant email pitches from other websites

Lady On Website Wonders If Sarah Palin Is Real Or Not

This e-mail made us sad. “In her column, Suzy offers her two cents on Sarah’s interview with Oprah, with the key takeaway is whether Sarah is real or not.” This “Suzy” sounds like a keeper, HEHNGNN? Read more on Lady On Website Wonders If Sarah Palin Is Real Or Not…
  justice in our time

Washington Post Passes Froomkin To Huffington Post For Victory!

Here’s some happy news: Fired WashingtonPost.com columnist Dan Froomkin has been hired by the Huffington Post to run the monster-blog’s new DC bureau. Now mean old neocon Charles Krauthammer and his faux-liberal enablers at the Washington Post can’t get Froomkin fired ever again, ha ha. Something makes us think Froomkin’s page views will go way up now that he’ll be promoted on the HuffPo front page rather than buried in the unloved online ghetto of the corrupt, dying Washington Post. Eat a bag of rat dicks, WaPo! [Andrew Sullivan] Read more on Washington Post Passes Froomkin To Huffington Post For Victory!…
  win the afternoon

HER LOSS: LANDRIEU DEFINITELY NOT AT BRITNEY CONCERT: The Huffington Post has run with this “gossip blog”‘s reported confirmed life-defining economy-saving news report about Eric Cantor going to see old Britney Spears sing last night, and they have gotten confirmation from Sen. Landrieu’s office that she was not, as it happens, there with Eric Cantor, as his office (and other parts of the Republican Apparatus, dare we mention) told us earlier today. [HuffPo] Read more on …
  sexy parties

SEXY NEW WINGNUTS!: The readers of the Huffington Post have selected this young man, the 27-year-old Aaron Schock of Peoria, Illinois, as the “hottest freshman” in Congress this year. Sorry ladies, he’s a Republican! His prize will be 45 minutes alone with Arianna in the “Printing Presses Through the Centuries” section of the Newseum. [HuffPo] Read more on …
  write yr own history!

A Fun Week-Too-Late Game Of Obama Hyperbole — Thanks, HuffPo!

Usually as we’re going through our “All New Items” tab on Google Reader and come to a batch of HuffPo articles, we scroll down as fast as possible for about 10 seconds while closing our eyes and clutching our loved ones, hoping that afterwards we may have finally broken through the hurling asteroid cluster of things like, “Alec Baldwin: UN Trade Envoy Could Talk Up Long-Term Interest Rates” or “Arianna Huffington: This Is Actually Another Publication’s Article That We’ve Copied Wholesale Onto Our Website So As To Get Top Google News Placement.” But today we came across this one called “Terrance Heath: America’s Mountaintop Moment,” and we’ve been trying to scroll through it for seven hours with no end in sight! It is about HMM GUESS WHO, and it’s generative enough for a fun game! Read more on A Fun Week-Too-Late Game Of Obama Hyperbole — Thanks, HuffPo!…
  leave barry and hillary alone!

Arianna Huffington Has Unique Take On Clinton Appointment

We’ll put this nicely since we don’t wish to become victims of Gawker-style HuffPo blogroll revenge: GIVE THE POOR DUO A CHANCE, FAIREST ARIANNA! She writes in this column of hers, “It’s a Nora Ephron romantic comedy. When Hillary Met Barack. Sleepless in Chappaqua. You’ve Got Fundraising Email. Two intensely driven politicians cross paths, each seeking the highest office in the land — talk about a cute meet!” Just… gahh… hmm… we see the writerly device here and it’s trite vapid plagiarism of Maureen Dowd not very edifying. Look. This selection process has been the most drama-free thing a Clinton has ever done. Celebrate! [HuffPo] Read more on Arianna Huffington Has Unique Take On Clinton Appointment…
  symbolism

WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?: Your Wonkette will now link you to a Huffington Post page that excerpts a New York Times article about the Recession possibly celebrating its first birthday now, according to math and economists. Rather than link directly to the New York Times article, we wanted to ask you, the reader, to figure out why the Huffington Post illustrated this story with an AP picture of a polar bear in a zoo staring at an enormous wooden advent candle. Is it… “bear market?” Ben Bernanke is a bear? Oh, ha!…?? In any event, happy birthday, you brutal cycle of deleveraging, you. [HuffPo] Read more on …
  sexy contests

John McCain Wants All ‘Joe The Plumbers’ In America To Send Him Amateur Porn Clips

Oh yes my friends, there is definitely a “JohnMcCain.com/Joe” site up and running now, and it’s a contest. How do you like that logo? It’s styled after a traditional blue collar name tag, for perhaps a set of overalls — a cute throwback to the 1950s, which was the last time America actually had blue collar jobs. Read more on John McCain Wants All ‘Joe The Plumbers’ In America To Send Him Amateur Porn Clips…
  oh that arianna blog!

Huffington Post: Roman?

Oh no, the Huffington Post is using a late-90s software that writes its e-mail text in Latin! We knew this all along — they have been plagiarizing Augustus Caesar, the first black president (according to Toni Morrison). Thank you to 900 people who forwarded this! Who knew that so many people subscribed to the Huffington Post’s “Off The Bus” newsletter? Read more on Huffington Post: Roman?…
  war of the heiresses

Paris Hilton’s Mom To McCain: No You’re Frivolous

We told you how Paris Hilton’s grandfather and dad were furious about John McCain’s idiot commercial comparing Barack Obama to white party girls, which was the horrible stunt that finally brought RACE into America’s colorblind politics. But now Paris’ own mom, Kathy Hilton, has published her terse tirade against the campaign her ultra-rich family once supported — she put it right there on Huffington Post, which is Rich America’s version of Twitter. Read more on Paris Hilton’s Mom To McCain: No You’re Frivolous…
  party crash

We Went To A Party At Netroots Nation!

Here’s the magic secret to throwing a good free party: Have an open bar that will pour actual booze instead of just beer and wine, serve good food, and make sure the attractive people show up. This last hurdle can be pretty difficult to overcome at a blogger party, which was why the geniuses at the Huffington Post and GQ made sure their Netroots Nation party would feature little Zooey Deschanel-lookalike nymphet waitresses and a healthy smattering of cute boys in slim-cut suits straight out of Mad Men. Of course everybody got wasted. Read more on We Went To A Party At Netroots Nation!…
 

Arianna Huffington Criticizes Harried ‘Conventional Wisdom Zombies’

newVideoPlayer("huff.flv", 463, 387,"");Wonkette’s Liz Glover had the opportunity last night to interview Arianna Huffington, founder of Daily Kos or something, about her new book and the nicknames she chooses for Tim Russert. When Liz is waiting for Arianna to sign her a copy of the book, some guy in line says “I know people that work for her,” presumably people who write for the Huffington Post. In other words, this guy knows any human being on earth. Read more on Arianna Huffington Criticizes Harried ‘Conventional Wisdom Zombies’…
 

‘Despicable Woman, Would You Agree?’

Bill O’Reilly is shocked that Huffington Post commenters say mean things about Nancy Reagan and Tony Snow! And so he sent some little man to confront the Hate Queen Arianna Huffington about her hateful hate speech and she had no response except some jibber jabber about how “the Internet works.” Read more on ‘Despicable Woman, Would You Agree?’…