Wonkette

Today’s Wonk’d brings us Hu Jintao, guarded like the superpower leader that he is, and Chris Rock — also being guarded, but maybe for different reasons. Jenna Bush and friends were seen, shockingly, waiting their turn in line, but the guys from Franz Ferdinand had ladies waiting in line for them. Media elites Tucker Carlson and David Gregory, ignoring high gas prices, were fillin’ ‘er up. Also spotted: Chelsea Clinton, hiding behind the latest fashions; R. Kelly, trying to get himself in more trouble; and John Ashcroft, ACTUALLY TAKING THE METRO. We deliver what we promise, plus so much more, after the jump.

We love our tipsters and all your hilarious tips, so please keep sending them to us via email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the spotted celeb). Thanks!

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* Deep in the bowels of his fortified bunker, devilishly wringing his hands, Hu Jintao channels his best evil scientist: “Yes, yes, my plan is working perfectly.” [Peking Duck] MORE »

Dick and Condi were, too. Photos from last week, when Chinese President Hu Jintao visited the White House:

Sorry for not blogging about this earlier! Guess we were asleep at the blogging wheel. Or maybe we were just “looking at our notes.”

(The Condi photo, by the way, lends support to the rumor that our superwoman Secretary of State occasionally naps at her desk.)

Also in the “we-meant-to-blog-about-this-last-week” file: the paparazzi shots of German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s bare butt (or, as the British tabloid The Sun referred to it, her “Bumdestag”). Photographers grabbed the shot while Chancellor Merkel changed into her bathing suit.

(After the jump, a not-safe-for-the-workplace photo of the German rump parliament. WARNING: Before clicking on the “More” button below, make sure your boss isn’t around.)

President Hu’s White House Visit [AFP/Getty Images]
ASSleep with the Fishes [PerezHilton]
Should Cheney Be Next? [Froomkin!]
Merkel’s Long, Strange Honeymoon [Newsweek]

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* Reliable Source: Michelle Kwan, Henry Kissinger, Tim Russert, Ron Silver, Dick Cheney, Condoleezza Rice, Barbara Bush, and Donald Rumsfeld attended “very fancy luncheon” for Hu Jintao; the menu included “corn broth with dumpling, halibut and melon.” [WP]
* Inside the Beltway: Pat Buchanan predicts divisions among conservatives are hitting a fever pitch. [WT]
* Rush & Molloy: Democratic strategist David Sirota blames Clinton for job loss overseas. [NYDN]
* Page Six: Ron Burkle is hosting a fundraiser for Sen. Clinton tonight in Beverly Hills. [NYP]
* Cindy Adams: Dan Rather says he was audited four times during the Nixon presidency. [NYP]

* Bush’s meeting with Chinese President Hu Jintao was heavy on symbolism, light on substance; Bush apologized for heckling. [WP, WP, NYT, WSJ, USAT]
* Bush, Jintao disagree about the dynamic of their relationship; “The mood was friendly, yet the tension was unmistakable.” [WP, NYT]
* Harriet Miers might be lost in the next phase of the White House shuffle; Tony Snow is “in negotiations” for McClellan’s post. [NYT]
* Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee raised more than double its GOP counterpart in this quarter; RNC, meanwhile, beat the DNC by a 1.9 to 1 ratio. [WP]
* Republican leaders plan to hit the ground running when they return from break; “41 percent of those polled said Congress has accomplished less than usual.” [WP]
* Democratic candidates are trying to use rising gas prices to their advantage. [NYT, WSJ]
* Rumsfeld dismisses critics as being against much-needed reform. [NYT]
* Chertoff compares crackdown against illegal immigrants to shutdown of the mob. [NYT]
* Case against AIPAC lobbyists concerns lobbyists and journalists. Professor: “The chilling effect could become glacial for anybody who is engaged in basic lobbying research or simply doing research or writing stories on national security issues.” [WP]
* Negroponte reveals that about 100,000 people are involved in intelligence operations around the world. [NYT]

* We definitely think the fact that it was a grenade and some weed is the funniest part. [The Boston Channel] MORE »

“Gesundheit!” And is that a sister trying to shut up the protestor?

Not really sure we have much to say about the big news story of the day, President Hu Jintao’s visit to the White House. Nuclear armageddon and human rights violations don’t lend themselves that easily to knee-slapping, gut-busting laughter.

The two presidents met in the Oval Office for a while and talked about lots of Big Issues — nuclear proliferation, trade, Taiwan — but announced no new agreements. The most interesting aspect of the visit was the welcome ceremony on the South Lawn. As President Bush spoke, with a translator providing translation every few sentences, we were struck by how it takes way longer to say stuff in Chinese than in English.

President Hu then started speaking. From the press podium, protester Wenyi Wang — no relation to Ziyi Zhang — began shouting about China’s persecution of the Falun Gong. Some of her shouts, in both English and Chinese, included “Stop the torture and killings!”, “Falun Dafa is good!”, and “I ain’t no hollaback girl!” (that one was in Chinese).

A few more random observations appear after the jump.

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* Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan will cost $94B in 2006, up from $48B in 2003, and higher than comparable costs of the Vietnam War; Senate will debate another round of emergency spending next week. [WP]
* Bolten “hopes to demonstrate to the public and the Republican-led Congress that it will no longer be business as usual in a White House afflicted by political defeats, an overseas war and shrinking public support”; Tony Snow and Dan Senor top the list of likely successors to McClellan. [WP, USAT, W$J]
* Bolten faces the challenge of finding “ways to open up the Oval Office to new ideas and to the opinions of people who are not longtime Bush confidants.” [WP]
* Rove will focus on November’s midterm elections: “The president and the new chief of staff said they wanted me focused on the big strategic issues facing the administration.” [NYT]
* Bush will urge Chinese President Hu Jintao to “take a more aggressive stance against governments that U.S. officials believe could potentially threaten U.S. interests and, more broadly, the international system.” [WP, W$J]

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* Demand for oil tops agenda for meeting of Bush and Chinese President Hu Jintao; “China has invested heavily in Iran, and as a permanent member of the Security Council, its position on the question of sanctions is crucial.” [NYT]
* Pentagon preps for war games about Iran. Bush: “All options are on the table.” [USAT]
* Construction of $592M embassy in Baghdad –the size of 80 football fields– is on target. [USAT]
* Bush: “I’m the decider, and I decide what’s best, and what’s best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the secretary of defense.” [NYT, USAT]
* Administration has not improved the sharing of intelligence data among agencies, GAO finds. [WP]
* Rob Portman, trade representative, is selected to replace Bolten as budget director; sends “gloomy signal [about] the prospects for achieving significant gains in trade talks with foreign countries anytime soon.” [WP, NYT, WP, USAT]
* Army Maj. Gen. Geoffrey Miller ordered to testify on abuse in Iraq. [WP]
* News organizations attempt to block subpoenas for documents related to leak investigation. [NYT]
* FBI seeks access to the files of the late columnist Jack Anderson. [NYT]
* Bush’s interest in human rights complicates visit with Jintao. [WP]
* Rumsfeld is playing dead, says Dana Milbank. [WP]