Whatever this is, it sure looks educational. Write your own context! Or just read what our Hill operative sent us, which still does not truly explain why this nut is ranting about AIG bonuses next to a picture that racist slob from teevee. MORE »

Oh look, positive health care news out of the House! Whoa whoa, TAKE IT EASY, Mitch Stewart — no money yet! Much work remains, for Health Care. But still, it looks like mean old Henry Waxman was able to reach a deal with those bitchy House Blue Dogs without sacrificing anything super-vital, like a public plan or an employer mandate. (Although certain minimums have been adjusted!) Now the House should — should! — be able to pass a decent enough bill in the end, which will be important for final committee negotiations, given the aristocratic Hell-bill that six actual whores in the Senate are producing. Nice work, opportunist Blue Dogs who were elected solely because of historic GOP unpopularity! You may now return to your cubby holes. [TPM]

Amazing things have happened in the House this afternoon; go read all of what Sam Stein wrote, here, he’s good at these things. Briefly, though: Rep. Neil Abercrombie of Hawaii — former buddy of Barack Obama Senior! — introduced a resolution “Recognizing and celebrating the 50th Anniversary of the entry of Hawaii into the Union as the 50th State,” which now includes the line, “Whereas the 44th President of the United States, Barack Obama, was born in Hawaii…” SO WHAT’S IT GONNA BE, GOP congressmen with insane constituents?? Apparently they need some time to think about this standard symbolic resolution, because Michele Bachmann blocked the quick and easy passage of it on the floor this afternoon. Why would she do that? [Huffington Post]

• HOUSE TURNS INTO RACIST LYING BLOODBATH FROM HELL: What a great last graf in this New York Times write-up of the hot mess between House Democrats today: “Racial overtones also appeared to creep into the intraparty dispute. One African-American Democrat pointed out that the seven Blue Dogs who were holding up the bill in the Energy and Commerce Committee were ‘a nondiverse group’ of white men.” Why did Barack Obama say this? [NYT]

Hey, remember that time a few hours ago when the liberal socialist Democrats and the fascist wingnut Democrats reached a “breakthrough” on health care? Well… eh: “Health care reform negotiations between conservative Democrats and Energy and Commerce Committee Chairman Henry Waxman (D-Calif.) collapsed Friday afternoon, a leading Blue Dog Democrat said. ‘It pretty much fell apart this afternoon,’ Rep. Mike Ross (D-Ark.) told reporters just off the House floor. Ross has been the lead Blue Dog negotiator in the committee.” Apparently Henry Waxman, being Henry Waxman, said, “Fuck all of you people in the butt,” and relations were strained! [HuffPo]

Famous liberal Barney Frank has aligned with famous Internet character Ron Paul and three other congresspeople to make the Marijuana legal, finally, in America! The bill is called the “Act to Remove Federal Penalties for Personal Use of Marijuana by Responsible Adults,” which sounds very responsible, and would make it federally legal to possess up to 100 grams of weed, for smoking or cooking or however you like to get high. But wingnut states can continue to have crazy laws against the Mexican Loco Weed, because of Ron Paul’s state rights! MORE »

• NOW WE WILL ALL DRIVE TREES! Whoa hey they managed to do it, the Democrats did, passing the Waxman-Markey American Clean Energy and SECURITY Act, 219-212 — eight Republicans voting Yea, 44 Democrats voting Naw. This sure is a “big victory” for Barack Obama! Except that it has to go to the Senate now and requires 60 votes, for being big, meaning 99% of it will be stripped out an hour before voting just to get one of those Maine ladies on board, resulting in just enough funding to give 5-7 Americans surgical masks, for the End Times… Ha ha, the future of Earth could rest on comedian Al Franken’s ability to cast a U.S. Senate vote. [AP]

Iowa Rep. Steve King, easily one of the top five House wingnuts and perhaps the most overtly evil and sneering one, has this to say about why we shouldn’t close Guantanamo Bay (where we could still keep the innocent Uighurs, whose imminent release was ordered by a federal court in 2008): MORE »

America’s favorite doctor, Ron Paul, is struggling with demons we cannot even begin to comprehend. Here he is whining to an empty House of Representatives last night, about the night terrors he suffers and the horrifying intrusion of interdimensional orcs into his waking life. [YouTube]

• CREDIT CARD BILL AWAITS NOBAMA: “The House today gave final approval to a bill that would prohibit credit card companies from arbritarily raising interest rates on existing balances and charging certain fees. With a 367-61 vote, the House ensured that President Obama will be able to sign the bill into law by Memorial Day, as he requested.” What is wrong with Congress, making such quick work of an overwhelmingly popular bill? [Washington Post]

Opossum-eyed Jesus geologist Joe Barton, Republican Congressman from Texas, signaled his intent last month to stop the liberal Waxman-Markey energy bill — the one with cap-and-trade, which is about hamburgers — with traditional adult methods of opposition: “I’m going to be the sneaky little guy that pops up from behind the bush and fights the guerrilla. But guerrilla warfare does succeed sometimes.” (Fortunately for him this world has professional transcribers, because he definitely was saying he wanted to fight a gorilla.) And now he is popping up from behind the bush with a reasonable plan to block the legislation by proposing 450 comical amendments — four-hundred-and-fifty — that will simply be rejected, one by one, during an exhausting process that will embarrass the United States around the world and in Heaven. HAW HAW HAW. MORE »