Tag: house of representatives

Screw the cookies. I want the Foreign Relations Committee

Liz Cheney Wins Wyoming Primary, Prepares To CONQUER HELL

Liz Cheney won the Republican primary for the open House seat in Wyoming, putting her on a path to eventual Overlordhood.

Nancy Pelosi Just Wondering How Many Of You Republicans Are On Slut Pills

Nancy thinks Republicans denying Zika funding because of Planned Parenthood are a buncha birth control-using hypocrites, yep yep yep.

President Obama Calls Trump Dumbass Again, Because Trump Is Being A Dumbass Again

Obama says Trump is 'woefully unprepared' for the presidency, and encourages Republicans like John McCain to grow some balls, please.

House Republican Dingbats Find New Thing To Investigate, And It Is House Democrats!

Did you know the House Democrats' gun control sit-in was very rude and against the rules? Let's punish them!

Benghazi Ambassador’s Sister Would Like Republicans To STFU And Stop Blaming Hillary

What, you mean the Republicans on the Benghazi committee actually don't speak for the families? You don't say!
The fever will rise again

Republicans Poison Zika Funding Bill With Important Help For Confederate Flag, Cuts To Obamacare

Democrats aren't too crazy about some of the provisions Republicans threw into the Zika funding bill. Isn't allowing Confederate flags in federal cemeteries an important part of fighting infectious disease?

GOP Benghazi Press Conference Basically Just Trey Gowdy Stepping Repeatedly On Own Dick

Tuesday's Republican Benghazi press conference was as pathetic as you'd imagine.
Winning the day.

House Republican Benghazi Report Fails To Convict Hillary Clinton Of Murder AGAIN

Who could have imagined the Benghazi investigation would have been a giant waste of all our time and money?

Democrats Release Benghazi Report Saying Hillary Not Murderer, How Is That Even Possible?

But surely Trey Gowdy will still find the smoking gun, yeah?

Paul Ryan SO MAD At Disrespectful Dems And Their Terrible Horrible Sit-In

Paul Ryan said he wouldn't dwell on the shocking lack of decorum in the House by Democrats who were staging a sit-in to call attention to gun violence. Then he very indecorously dismissed the action as a "publicity stunt" for the sole purpose of raising funds.

Texas Republican Figures It’s Cool To Screw The Gays Since Pulse Club Victims Were Just Hispanics

Why do those gays want to be protected from discrimination? Didn't Pete Sessions already send thoughts and prayers?

GOP Congressman Would Like To Do Some Texas Justice To Rapist Brock Turner. No, For Real.

Trigger warning, because this Republican might just make you cry. Or cheer. Or both.

Nancy Pelosi Just Cold Trollin’ Paul Ryan Now, And Also She Hatin’

Pelosi can't stop chuckle-snorting about what a weenus Paul Ryan is, and it's GREAT.
But...but...I need my paycheck!

Wingnut Tea Party Jerk Renee Ellmers Loses Primary, Calls Woman Fat, Like You Do

Rep. Renee Ellmers, a Tea Party darling who was a reliable voice of wingnuttery on cable TV news, lost her primary election Tuesday after her seat was redistricted. We wish her a fond farewell and a well-deserved obscurity.

Louie Gohmert Pretty Sure Space-Queers Wouldn’t Be Very Good At Saving Humanity

Texas Republican Congresshick Louie Gohmert has some thoughts to share about gays, outer space, Matt Damon, and traditional het’rosexual romance!