homosexuals
Vatican Advisor Says True Thing
We here at Wonkette mostly luuuuurve our new pope, New Pope. He is a communist (communism!)! He saved and returned all his newspaper rubber bands every month (loves the environment!)! He went to the slums and did Mass for hookers (like Bizarro American Jesus!)! He did his own cooking and lived in a little apartment [...]
Unsuccessful Dallas City Council Candidate Informs Insufficiently Homophobic Reporter Of His Ball-lessness, Resemblance To Lady Bits
As a woman what has been in the media for eeep, more than 22 years (?!), your editrix is not unfamiliar with voicemails of the angrier kind. Over the decades, she has been called a cunt and a Nazi and cunt Nazi, whose attitude could only be adjusted by a proper, good-old-fashioned raping. She has [...]
But What About Gay Messicans?
DDM back to help splain some Congressional nitty-gritty-ness. There have been lots of happy nice times about our GLBTQMORELETTERS friends lately, because people around the country are finally looking around and saying, hey, these gay folks ain’t that bad! In fact, they seem almost like actual human beings, so maybe we could, you know, give them [...]
Niall Ferguson Mansplains Why He Is Sorry About Being Right For Bashing Gays
Last week, Niall Ferguson (an “economic historian” at Harvard) provided a controversial analysis of Keynesian economic policies, arguing that John Maynard Keynes was just too GAY to be a good economist because of something having to do with too much buttseks and no babymaking (no, seriously, this was pretty much exactly what he said.) But [...]
Super-Rich Republicans Have Become Totally Selfless And Enlightened About The Whole Gay Marriage Deal
If you’re as old as we are, and have had as much exposure to Reg’lar ‘Murica as we have, you are probably still a bit dizzied at the pace at which the majority of Americans went from “Ew! Gheys!” to “Ah, ain’t that a cute lesbian couple!” We close our eyes, breathe deeply and meditate [...]
Dumb Gays Now Ruining Immigration Bill Too
First the lesby-friends singlehandedly poison-pilled the Violence Against Women Act, by asking if pretty please they could be included in legislation to Stop Beating Your Wife. Now they and their Proud Mary male gay counterparts are ruining Republicans’ chances of ever getting to vote for an immigration bill — because if they don’t it is [...]
Your Tuesday Nice Time: DC Imam Marries Gay Couples, For Creeping Sharia
So it turns out there is this super rad Islamic cleric in Washington, DC, who marries gay couples because, like decent people of all faiths, Imam Daayiee Abdullah just ignores the crazy medieval stuff and focuses on the let’s just love each other part of his faith. “I think we’re at the start of a movement: a [...]
Hero GOP Senator’s Office Tells Gays To Go Grow Their Own Food and Gasoline
Washington state Senator Mike Hewitt is cosponsoring an awesome and superconstitutional antidiscrimination bill, SB 5927. It says you can’t discriminate against people based on their race, country of origin, sexual orientation, etc., unless you really really want to. Cool bill! Very awesome! You may not refuse to do commerce or real estate with someone who [...]
Your Morning Nice Time: Watch New Zealand Burst Into Maori Love Song After Gay Marriage Is Legalized
Our video begins with a person saying something about crocs and biscuits and lorries and WC’s and hobbits and whatnot, we do not know, we do not speak New Zealand. We are just kidding, of course we speak New Zealand, he is asking the people in the gallery not to interrupt. Do they listen to [...]
Your Morning Nice Time: Missouri University Has Gay Kids’ Backs
Can we please talk about something good in the world today, wonketteers? How about a good old blame the gays, but for bringing on a little happy cry for once? As always, the road to gay hell is paved with good intentions and vice versa, so it’s no surprise that this feel-good happy rainbow unicorn [...]
RNC Bigot/Ex-Pilot Dave Agema Talks About His Issues Inside Homosexual ‘Flight Attendant Realm’
Republican National Committeeman Dave Agema got away with saying Obama and pretty much every terrorist is a Muslim and cutting funding to orphans and skipping budget votes to shoot sheep so it’s no wonder that he’s genuinely surprised other Republicans are now very upset because he turned his trademark awfulness toward the gays. So Agema has [...]
Georgia GOP Chair Worried ‘I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry’ Will Be A Real Thing
Hey remember that one movie, with the dudes, but they are straight, but they gay marry each other? It looked like it was going to be 90 minutes of gay-panic jokes, but then it was surprisingly sweet, if we recall correctly since we probably watched it on cold medicine because there is no way we [...]
Willie Nelson Continues Unbroken 79-Year Bestness Streak
“I never thought of marriage as something only for men and women. But I’d never marry a guy I didn’t like.” — Willie Nelson, in this lovely little Texas Monthly interview, which you should trot off and read. Giddyup. [TexasMonthly / Amazon]
Colorado Legalizes Civil Unions, Moves To Desegregate Drinking Fountains Next
Congratulations, Colorado! It is the year of our lord 2013, and you have just now decided to let gay people formalize their relationships even though they put their mouths on men’s wangs and/or ladies’ muffins when they themselves have wangs or muffins. We would be bitchier about this, but Talking Points Memo assures us that [...]
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