Wonkette

Yesterday, conservative columnist Bob Novak ran over a pedestrian who flew on top of his windshield. Then Novak sped away and, when captured, pretended that he had no idea. The police gave him a $50 ticket. Maybe in this economy that’s a lot, hmm? Anyway, the victim was originally reported as a 66-year-old pedestrian, but according to new information, he is actually an 86-year-old homeless guy who remains in the hospital. The Main Stream Media continues to conceal the truth, which is that the victim is a 72-year-old homeless doctor martyr named Ron Paul. [Washington Post]

Already known as the worst, meanest driver in Washington, this morning Robert Novak was caught by witnesses driving into a pedestrian and speeding away from the crime scene. Novak was racing down 18th Street through the K St. NW intersection when he hit a much younger man, a 66 year old who was using the crosswalk and had a green walk signal. MORE »

Boy, we sure can’t bring ourselves to have an opinion about that whole Danish cartoon thing. Believe us, we tried. We briefly considered posting nothing but crudely-drawn cartoons of Mohammed making fun of hospital bed-bound amputee American soldiers (caption: “Christ, what an asshole.”), as that would finally unite Islamic Militants and the American Military establishment against a common enemy, but eh, we’re lazy. And a little tipsy. So we decided to take our cue on how to respond from our Opinion Leaders who blog in the name of their various money-losing magazines. MORE »

Reason Editor-in-Chief Nick Gillespie exposes the fussy evolution of fissile pride: MORE »