hillary clinton

This weekend a scaly, horrifying, rage-addled lizard rose from the depths of its subterranean lair and slithered onto screens all over the country, where it opened its jaw and shrieked high-pitched noises at terrified Americans as it stomped its way across the land, leaving destruction in its wake. Yep, Dick Cheney was on Fox News […]

Stephen Colbert brings you the definitive analysis of Karl Rove’s recent medical genius, in which the Republican operative and Fox News pundit diagnosed Hillary Clinton with brain damage. Sure, Rove’s gotten a lot of flack for the completely unfounded speculation, but on the other hand, cable TV news is definitely talking about it, so Rove’s […]

One specter that has always hovered over a Hillary Clinton campaign for president in 2016 is the possibility – the certainty – that all the old spirits of the 1990s will be conjured up and released into the world to wreak havoc and slime anyone in their way in the political equivalent of shutting down the containment […]

Everybody knows that the denizens of Fox News dwell in a fetid fact-free swamp, a veritable no-holds-barred cage match to see who can lie in the most spectacular way, so it isn’t really surprising that Karl Rove oozed his way out of their primordial muck and slimed over to a conference in Los Angeles to […]

Is our favorite vice president of all time, Old Handsome Joe Biden, guzzling some of those five-hour energy drinks we see advertised everywhere? Because word is he went to a Democratic Party fundraiser in South Carolina on Friday night and tore shit up, son. Probably going to be a mini-Democratic baby boom down in that […]

So we all know that President B. Barry Bamz hates St. Ronald Reagan, right? It is clear, established fact that everything Nobummer does is directly related to desecrating the memory of Reagan’s lifetime of achievements. Remember when Obama was going to tear down Reagan’s childhood home using only his testicles as wrecking balls? Well apparently […]

Jon Stewart spent some quality time mocking our collective fascination with discussing the 2016 presidential race, particularly as it is actually the 2014 mid-terms that are right around the corner. Never mind that! Let’s speculate about who could run! Stewart is laying even money on antibiotic resistant strep and the petrified exoskeleton of Donald Trump’s […]

Heard any good jokes lately? No. No you haven’t. Because it has been twenty years-ish (?) since Peewee Herman got busted bustin’ in that porn theater, and I got busted … well you know. I am the last time a joke happened. That was me. Well, now I am back, to tell my story for […]

Since it was Nerd Prom aka the White House Correspondents’ Association dinner last night, your Twitter timeline was already full of all the barbs and jabs and gentle ribbing that Obama put into his speech, but the the Old Gray Lady moves a bit slower, so the Times has Bamz’ comedic stylings as one of […]

Hero of Americanism and decency Glenn Beck took a few minutes to yell at politicians whose views on same-sex marriage have evolved, because changing your mind is weak and hypocritical, and nowhere near as principled as always holding the same views forever: “You’re saying this is the civil rights issue of our day, and you […]

Jon Stewart gets at the very important issue of sexism in politics with “breaking news from the inside of another human being” — that is, Chelsea Clinton’s Politically Meaningful Baby, the grandchild that could make all the difference for Hillary Clinton’s possible campaign, or be completely meaningless — except to Darrell Issa, who “has already […]

We breathed a sigh of relief when Jon Stewart returned from vacation to finally finally finally give the Bundy Ranch nonsense the tongue-lashing it deserved, and we’re equally grateful that Stephen Colbert has finally returned to deal with the confoundingly stupid idea that Hillary planned both Chelsea’s pregnancy and ShoeGate to somehow coincide with her […]

Is it 2016 yet? Have we inaugurated Hillary Clinton already? CNN BREAKING NEWS: No, it is only 2014. Yet rumors persist about who is and is not running for President to replace Our Dreamy Guiding Star of Socialist Hippie Liberalism Barack HU-SANE Obama. It looks like we may have another contender, and she is a […]

Man, we hadn’t thought of Bernard Goldberg in AGES because he doesn’t seem to have published any new screedbooks to pimp at CPAC about the lamestream media, but apparently he has kept on truckin’ over at his mighty fine looking blog where he and his bloggers — probably nine of them, full-time — are just […]

“LAS VEGAS (AP) — A woman was taken into custody after throwing what she described as a shoe at Hillary Clinton during a Las Vegas speech.” Above we have almost the Platonic ideal of a newswire story opening, or “lede.” There is celebrity, there is strife, there is danger … and there is the respectable […]