hillary clinton
Republicans Fabricated Smoking Gun Emails They Maybe Illegally Leaked; Forgot To Add Smoking Gun
First, a disclaimer: We, like you, are so. Fucking. Tired! of Benghazi. If Republicans had just taken our advice, they would not be suffering in the polls because they are wasting everyone’s time, and we would not be weeping into our latte because we have to keep struggling to wring a few drops of funny [...]
Hillary Is Going To Come Out! Exclusive! Must Credit Wonkette For Writing About the Enquirer!
Remember John Edwards? You do, and you are sad about it, yeah? Your own little progressive Icarus who flew too close to the bright hot sun of the National Enquirer and then fell to earth, wings aflame, or hurtled into the sun, or exploded or something. We do not know because we skipped Greek classics [...]
How Did We Respond To Attacks On US Diplomats Before Hillary Clinton Did Them All?
Your Wonkette was wondering: Prior to 9/11/12, when God and Hillary Clinton did 9/11 Classic to four Americans in Libya, a place of Muslims, was there anything? Here’s what we mean: Did history start on that date, or was there a bunch of stuff that “came before,” stuff like other terrorist attacks on US diplomatic [...]
Michele Bachmann: God Did Benghazi
Well, looks like Hillary Clinton can relax, she will not get inpeached for murdering all the Libyan ambassadors even before her election and swearing in. But why won’t she get inpeached, when she finally got her two a.m. phone call and jumped into action to personally fly to Benghazi and do murder? She will not [...]
Stop Hitting Yourself, And Other Advice For Benghazi-Obsessed Wingnuts
Usually when we at Wonkette tell the opposition to go do something, it is a thing you would not advise your mother to do, on Mother’s Day Eve or any other Eve, unless you wanted to hurt her feelings because she was a bad mother, or because you’re a dick. This is not one of [...]
Fox News Was Right About Benghazi All Along and Probably Everything Else Too
Impeach! Impeach! IMPEACH! Everything terrible you ever believed about our tyrannical gun-grabbing socialist Muslim foreign-born gay president has turned out to be true, according to the latest expose on Solyndra Fast and Furious Benghazi from ABC News: ABC News has obtained 12 different versions of the talking points that show they were extensively edited as [...]
Hillary Clinton Elected President of Running for President in 2016
The votes are in: 51% of American voters have said in a poll that Hillary Clinton will run for president in 2016. Your Wonkette probably would have skipped the effort and just polled Hillary Clinton on whether she will run for president in 2016, but it is tradition in political journalism to first consult three [...]
Rightwing Radio Host Has Giant Sad That It Got Better For Hillary Clinton
Sandy Rios, last seen in these pages wondering why our Supreme Court’s female justices cannot just shut up and respect their male betters, returns to remind us once again that all you need to score your own radio show is an ability to open your screech hole and let fly: Hillary Clinton, there have long [...]
Young Fresh With-It Dude Mitch McConnell Delighted With His Hilarious Funny About Hillary Clinton, Aged Crone
It is time once again for CPAC, people tell us, which means the universe itself has stopped on its axis so that we all might gawk in wonder at the most important conclave to ever unite in snake-handling and griftiness. But lo! Who is that hip and happening groovy young man? It is Mitch McConnell, [...]
FreedomWorks: Your New Source For Hillary Clinton Sexxxxxxytime…With Pandas!
Here at Wonket, we are pretty grateful for FreedomWorks. They’re like the snotty libertarian half-brother of grownup GOP PACs. Their notorious infighting devolved into a downright theater of the absurd when Dick Armey showed up WITH GUNS to remove top employees. Way to make office politics interesting, Dick! Speaking of interesting…ok, you know what? We’ve [...]
Yeah, No, Seriously, Los Angeles Spree-Killer Cop Is Really, *REALLY* Liberal
We have already read about what made Los Angeles spree-killin’ cop Christopher Dorner go Django on the entire LAPD (and their families). It was LAPD racisms. So we know who (and what) he hates. But who does he love? Just about all your typical libtards, like Hillary Clinton and Larry David and Ellen Degeneres and [...]
blog advertising is good for you
