Tag Archives: hhs

  Breakin' the law breakin' the law

Oh Look Who Is Actually Breaking The Law (Hint: It’s Not Planned Parenthood)

Well, isn’t this ironic, don’t you think? The Obama administration has notified two states that took steps to halt Medicaid funds to Planned Parenthood Federation of America that they may be in conflict with federal law. […] Read more on Oh Look Who Is Actually Breaking The Law (Hint: It’s Not Planned Parenthood)…
  Nope not that either

Kansas Plan To F*ck The Poors Somehow Costing Millions, Is That Bad?

Oops
Kansas Republicans had a terrific plan to turn their state into the best state EVER, with tax cuts for the rich and — well, that was mostly the plan. Surprise! It hasn’t worked, and not just because the evil liberal media said mean things about Gov. Sam Brownback. Read more on Kansas Plan To F*ck The Poors Somehow Costing Millions, Is That Bad?…
  Yes the law is the law even for ladycare

Yes, Insurance Companies Have To Cover Your Vag

Pay the fuck up
It should not be necessary for the Obama administration to tell health insurance companies, “Seriously, you have to, it’s THE LAW!” about the requirements of the Affordable Care Act, but alas. It seems the insurance industry figured the Department of Health and Human Services’s specific guidelines for coverage of women’s preventive health care were, like, suggestions. Not the actual law that insurance companies are required to follow, because it is THE LAW: Read more on Yes, Insurance Companies Have To Cover Your Vag…
  This Fuckin' Guy

Florida Gov. Rick Scott: Yes, I Am A Lying Piece Of Sh*t

Yes, he's a monster
Need another reason to hate Florida’s governor with the fire of a thousand suns melting the ice caps to drown the state, even though you’re not allowed to say that there? Probably not, but Rick Scott is nothing if not ambitious, so here ya go, have some more hate for the guy: Read more on Florida Gov. Rick Scott: Yes, I Am A Lying Piece Of Sh*t…
  Thanks Obama again and again and again

Oh Hey Look At All The Billions Of Dollars Hospitals Are Saving With Obamacare

I laugh at you idiots! So much!
It’s been a while since we reminded you that with Obamacare, everyone wins, right? Like that one lady who was all, “Oh no, I cannot afford my cancer treatment now because of how Obamacare makes it so much more expensive!” except that Obamacare was saving her money on her cancer treatment, and she did not even have to say THANKS OBAMA! And all those folks in Oklahoma who are saving sooooo many shiny nickels on their medicine now because, that’s right, Obamacare. And that one sheriff who hates Obamacare so much, he’d rather die than buy health insurance, but bleeding heart liberals are giving them their hard-earned monies to help him pay off his medical bills anyway, and that’s hard-earned monies they probably only have laying around because of how they’re not as dumb as their sheriff and have purchased better, cheaper health insurance, thanks to Obamacare. And then, of course, there’s the federal government, which is spending less on health care costs than previously predicted, which sounds like the kind of spending cuts fiscal conservatism some political party is generally in favor of, but we can’t remember who that is right now. Read more on Oh Hey Look At All The Billions Of Dollars Hospitals Are Saving With Obamacare…
  Burning Issues: The Week In Weed

House Passes ‘No Welfare For Weed’ Bill, Which Fails To Ban Welfare For Weed

After coming back from a five-week “district work period” for eight action-packed days of legislating, members of the House and Senate went slinking out of DC on Thursday while mumbling over their shoulders that they’d be on email if anything should come up before the midterm elections. No worries, since all the important stuff got done: both chambers passed a stopgap funding bill to avert a shutdown showdown until just before Christmas, Trey Gowdy got to have all his friends over for his Benghazi Party, and the House of Representatives even found time to pretend they banned people who get government assistance from buying marijuana in those heathen enclaves where such a thing can be done legally. Read more on House Passes ‘No Welfare For Weed’ Bill, Which Fails To Ban Welfare For Weed…
  hhs tells issa to suck it

No Fair — How Can Darrell Issa Leak Obamacare Website Security Info If HHS Won’t Trust Him?

When we first read this article about notorious cosmic dingleberry Darrell Issa (R-Satan’s Bunghole), we seriously had a newsgasm. After cleaning up our computer screen, we have been laughing ever since, because… well, this is just so awesome, even though it is from Politico: The Health and Human Services Department told… Chairman Darrell Issa [R-CA] that it won’t turn over documents related to the security of the Healthcare.gov website because it can’t trust him to keep secret information that could give hackers a roadmap to wreak havoc on the system. Issa is apparently none too happy, last seen stomping his feet and whining and carrying on, showing his true colors as a shitty little titty-baby. Come, fellow wonkeroos of wonklandia, let’s awesomesplore an agency finally calling out Issa for being the despicable rat-fucking piece of human filth that he is.  Read more on No Fair — How Can Darrell Issa Leak Obamacare Website Security Info If HHS Won’t Trust Him?…
  analogy fail

Tennessee Rep. Marsha Blackburn Defends Sacred Right To Buy Cheap Shoes, Crappy Insurance

Tennessee congressjerk Marsha Blackburn doesn’t hold with an oppressive federal government meddling in people’s choices — unless of course it involves sluts who want contraception or abortions, duh — and she gave HHS Secretary Kathleen Sebelius a piece of her mind about it at Wednesday’s Yell-At-Obamacare hearing in the House, pointing out that maybe Americans like their crappy cheap insurance that doesn’t actually cover anything: “Some people like to drive a Ford, not a Ferrari … And some people like to drink out of a red Solo cup, not a crystal stem. You’re taking away their choice.” Of course, a lot of the plans that are being canceled by insurance companies are the equivalent of a Yugo with a cracked block and four flat tires. The Affordable Care Act simply says that insurers can’t continue to sell go-carts and claim they’re OK to drive on the freeway. (Analogies are fun!) Read more on Tennessee Rep. Marsha Blackburn Defends Sacred Right To Buy Cheap Shoes, Crappy Insurance…
  enfranchise thyself

GOP Terrified That Obamacare Will Make It Easier For Poors To Vote

For some time there’s been a simmering freakout on the right about how the Affordable Care Act did sex with the National Voter Registration Act of 1993 and now everyone who visits an ObamaKare Throat-Booting Center will be force-fed a voter registration form while Kathleen Sebelius tattoos DEMORAT COMMIE 4 LYFE on their necks. Sounds great, right? Well cool your jets, because Mother Jones is reporting that the Department of Health and Human Services is suddenly getting coy about enforcing the “motor voter” requirements at federally-run exchanges: In August, Demos and Project Vote released a report stating that HHS was not planning to provide the voter registration services that the Motor Voter law requires. These services include training navigators, the people hired to help Americans sign up for coverage through the exchanges, to help applicants with voter registration. Demos noted in the report that HHS intended to merely provide a link in the insurance application to the federal voter registration mail-in form. As recently as August, your POTUS was all like, “Hell yes we are respecting this hustle,” so we are not sure what HHS is up to. Mother Jones speculates that it’s just 11-dimensional chess: Read more on GOP Terrified That Obamacare Will Make It Easier For Poors To Vote…
  appetizing young hate for sale

Marco Rubio Would Not Like To Try Your Sample Of Obamacare Thank You Very Much

Oh, conservatives. Your perpetual ragesad about Obamacare could power a small country. We lose track of what you are mad at today. What are you mad at today? Oh hey, Marco Rubio. Didn’t see you there. Were you off getting a drink of water? Anyway. What’s got your tear ducts flowing? Oh. You’re sad that the government is going to spend money to advertise a law that you don’t like because not fair? That seems totally reasonable. Read more on Marco Rubio Would Not Like To Try Your Sample Of Obamacare Thank You Very Much…
  repeal me a grape

BREAKING! HOUSE VOTES TO KILL OBAMACARE! HISTORIC MOVE PORTENDS FUTURE VOTES TO KILL OBAMACARE!

So the House voted — for the 38th and 39th times, since there’s two different bills — to strangle Obamacare in its cradle, which pretty much means it was Wednesday. But this time it is Historic, because Newt Gingrich said it is. (Best footnote: Newt’s Twitter page still has a “Newt 2012” campaign banner on it. History!) Elsewhere, in reality, the Department of Health and Human Services is preparing a report showing that in 11 states where insurance exchanges have been set up, rates for insurance plans will actually be lower than Congressional Budget Office projections. But they would say that, wouldn’t they? Read more on BREAKING! HOUSE VOTES TO KILL OBAMACARE! HISTORIC MOVE PORTENDS FUTURE VOTES TO KILL OBAMACARE!…
  suffer the little children

Barack Obama Now Trying To Murder White Children, With Asthma

How is the Obama administration trying to murder white children today? Oh, only by giving them more asthma, for racial fairness, according to this incredibly logical and sane explicator in The American Thinker. Thinking! Pull up your coffee, and learn how to do it, with the American Thinker to guide you! The Obama Administration has identified the latest front in its tireless war against America’s systemic injustice: asthma. A new report […] argues, in effect, that freedom has led to an unfair distribution of healthy lungs, and therefore steps must be taken to achieve respiratory justice. The official press release for this report does not commit itself on the question of whether greater asthmatic-racial “parity” ought to be attained by reducing the incidence of asthma among minorities, increasing the rate among whites, or some combination of the two. Well of course Barack Obama wants to give more white children asthma, that is what the EPA drones over the Heartland are for, to ooze diabolical chem-trails onto the (white) children of farmers, that just makes sense. Read more on Barack Obama Now Trying To Murder White Children, With Asthma…
  counterfactuals

OH, WHAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN: According to the testimony of some union thug, Rod Blagojevich thought that maybe he could appointed Secretary of Health and Human Services if he appointed close personal Obama friend Valerie Jarrett to the Senate. He came up with this idea after he specifically found out that Obama wanted Jarrett to be a White House advisor, so maybe Blago isn’t all that bright? But the important thing here is to try to imagine how the health care reform debate would have gone if Blagojevich were HHS secretary. Presumably for months now we would all have had a 100 percent free single-payer health insurance program, run by the mafia. [WP] Read more on …
  not really though

Also, The Health & Human Services Building Is Blowing Up

We were so excited to see a tip in our inbox with the subject line, “Explosion at HHS Building,” because buildings? Blowing up? Dead bodies? HELLO, PAGEVIEWS! $$$$$$! But, alas, it was just “small explosion” a repairman caused while working on something. No one was hurt, no fires. LAME SANDWICH. Read more on Also, The Health & Human Services Building Is Blowing Up…
  strange cabinet appointees

Sassy Daytime Talkshow Host To Become America’s Doctor?

Wonkette operative “tom m.” informs us of the latest disturbing addition to Barack Obama’s cabinet, which already includes a space pirate: “Why is Obama nominating Sally Jesse to head HHS?” [Washington Post] Read more on Sassy Daytime Talkshow Host To Become America’s Doctor?…