Tag: healthcare

Obama Saves Alaska! Wonkagenda For Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Obama saves Alaska, Trump's spawn tried steal some cash, and Chris Christie just got screwed! Your Daily News Brief

GOP Congressdick Will Fix Healthcare, By Letting Your Kid Sleep On His Broken Bones (No, Really)

Silly kids, crying about how their bones are broken. MAN UP AND WALK IT OFF!

Obama Refuses To Publicly Kick Russian And FBI Ass In End-Of-Year Press Conference

He's so classy all the time, WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE SO CLASSY ALL THE TIME?

Chuck Schumer Announces Plan To Grow Spine On Obamacare, Let GOP Hang Itself

Democrats with a spine? WHOA IF TRUE!

If This Hillary Clinton Ad Doesn’t Make You Cry, You Are Dead Inside

Hillary Clinton is a really, really good person.

Trump Campaign Manager Idiot Wishes Hillary Clinton Would Stop Calling Trump Names

Kellyanne Conway wishes Hillary would stop calling Trump names and ... we dunno, be better at scoring hot chicks?

Elizabeth Warren Endorses Hillary, Because They’re Both Corporate Sell-Out Monsters. Obviously.

And now everything is hunky dory and people are being SO NICE to Sen. Warren, obviously.

Barack Obama’s Excellent South Asian Vacation!

Barack Obama is wrapping up his gnarly Vietnamese vacation. Wish we were there!

BERNIE AND HILLARY AGREE LOUDLY AT EACH OTHER FOR TWO SHOUTY HOURS!

Oh goodness and BREAKING NEWS and whoop-de-doo, there was another Democratic debate Thursday night. It was riveting. (LIES!) No for real it was great. (YOU'VE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME.) Well they yelled at each other a lot, at least! Here...
Yes, he's a monster

Florida Gov. Rick Scott Does Douchebag Thing, Because He Is Douchebag

Hip-hooray and WE TOLD YOU SO. We reported last week on the hottest new trend in ladyparts healthcare, which is getting your vaginal business district checked out at mobile eye care or mobile dental units. It's efficient! Unless you're...
Needs more glowing blue eyes and speaking in ALL CAPS

Christian ‘Insurance’ Helps Members Love On Others, Avoid Demonic Obamacare

Christians who can't stand Barack Obama's socialist government takeover of healthcare have been rushing to buy into "health care sharing ministries," which give them an affordable alternative to actually having insurance, as long as they don't mind not having...

Hobby Lobby CEO Says Marco Rubio’s Huge Penis Much Classier Than Trump’s Little Nub

REPUBLICAN PRIMARY OVER, EVERYONE. Hobby Lobby CEO and Jesus-loving abortion hater David Green has issued a proclamation from upon high about which Republican candidate he loves the mostest, and surprise, it's Not Donald Trump: Two days ahead of his state's...

Republicans Still Gunning For Planned Parenthood, Maybe They’ll All End Up In Jail

This week, we all learned a valuable lesson about how doing crimes to Planned Parenthood doesn't pay. Or, more precisely, those of us who already knew that sat back and laughed and drank sad "pro-life" tears because the lying crook fraudster...

Fox News Outraged Planned Parenthood Witch Hunt Burning Wrong Witches

Sure is tough to be a rightwing "pro-life" full-of-bull propaganda machine these days. On Monday, we learned the sleazy jizz rags behind the "gotcha" videos of Planned Parenthood doing "crimes" to "baby parts" have been indicted in Houston, Texas, for being...

You’ll Never Guess Who Might Be Going To Prison For Those Planned Parenthood Videos

Last year, we heard some devastating whoa if true horror stories about Planned Parenthood. Undercover videos released by a group of "pro-life" terrorist-sympathizer scumbags called the Center for Medical Progress, led by cock rash James O'Keefe wannabe David Daleiden, confirmed the...

Congress Votes To Keep America Running For At Least One More Year, Hooray!

In an exciting plot twist no one could have predicted, Congress decided to do its job -- and just in time for everyone to take the rest of the year off! (Haha, if you are a member of Congress....