Tag Archives: healthcare

  Mad About A Thing

Jeb Bush Doesn’t Know Dick About Women’s Healthcare

Oh really? So this happened: Don’t believe it? See for yourselves: Perhaps Jeb Bush, who proudly slashed Florida’s funding of women’s healthcare when he was the state’s governor and redirected it to crisis pregnancy centers, which do not provide healthcare services, would like to clarify precisely what he means by “women’s health issues.” Read more on Jeb Bush Doesn’t Know Dick About Women’s Healthcare…
  Breakin' the law breakin' the law

Oh Look Who Is Actually Breaking The Law (Hint: It’s Not Planned Parenthood)

Well, isn’t this ironic, don’t you think? The Obama administration has notified two states that took steps to halt Medicaid funds to Planned Parenthood Federation of America that they may be in conflict with federal law. […] Read more on Oh Look Who Is Actually Breaking The Law (Hint: It’s Not Planned Parenthood)…
  Another victory for the homofascists grrrrr

Mean RNC No Fun Anymore, Won’t Even Put Gay-Bashing In Platform

Chapter 10: Pointing and laughing at sad wingnuts who lost the fight LOL Being a staunchly conservative wingnut in America sucks these days. First Barack Obama replaced all the Christians in the military with homosexuals, and then he did gay marriage to America, and now suddenly, a good Bible-believing baker can’t even bash gays in peace without some liberal saying, “If you bake cakes, you have to sell them to gays too.” Where did their country go? And here’s more evidence! The liberals at the Republican National Committee refused to approve two resolutions, one about hating gays, and the other also about hating gays, because somehow overt bigotry is bad for electablity these days, like that even matters: Read more on Mean RNC No Fun Anymore, Won’t Even Put Gay-Bashing In Platform…
  He's A Pretty Smart Guy

Donald Trump Will Repeal Obamacare, Replace It With Terrific Fence

Why don't you pass the time in the ER with a game of solitaire?
Donald Trump has the YOOGEST, CLASSIEST plan ever to replace Obamacare, and it’s going to be so incredible, it will probably blow his already-perfect plans for defeating ISIS out of the water, that’s how good it is. On CNN this week, Trump outlined his detailed plans for getting rid of Obamacare: “It’s gotta go … Repeal and replace with something terrific.” But lest you think that’s a bit short on detail, he also explained that TrumpCare would rely on the free market, and would allow people to buy insurance in any state they want. But for people who can’t afford private insurance, he’s no monster; he’d take decisive action: Read more on Donald Trump Will Repeal Obamacare, Replace It With Terrific Fence…
  nice time!

Pro-Life Colorado Republicans Angry That Teen Abortion Rate Declining

They work!
Who would have guessed that the “pro-life” sex education plan, which is essentially “do not have sex ever, you whore,” doesn’t work? Everyone would have guessed that! But Colorado has a lesson to teach America about what DOES work, and it is free birth control for everyone, so that ladies can do sex without worrying about unplanned pregnancies. We’re not sure the religious right will like this news, because it also means that ladies can do sex without asking their permission: Read more on Pro-Life Colorado Republicans Angry That Teen Abortion Rate Declining…
  America saw him first

Majority Of Americans Agree God Loves America Best

And that's how America was made!
Here is some interesting news, as we U.S. Americans begin our annual weekend of getting real drunk and shooting off fireworks, due to something we read in a history book about America but can’t quite remember. (Muskets were involved.) Did you know that, according to 53% of Americans, our country has a “special relationship” with God? Take THAT, 195 other countries in the world, you all are just acquaintances with God, whereas He is taking US to the prom, and is going to ask us to gay marry Him any day now, WE JUST KNOW IT: Read more on Majority Of Americans Agree God Loves America Best…
  never give up never surrender

GOP Rep. To Supreme Court: If You Like Obamacare So Much, Why Don’t You Gay Marry It?

Future Republican Member of Congress
After the Supreme Court saved Obamacare, AGAIN, most Republicans were more or less content to stomp their feet, shake their tiny fists of fury, repeat their five-year-old warnings that expanded healthcare access will destroy America (any day now, you’ll see!), and have themselves a good cry. And we drank of their tears, and enjoyed them ever so. Read more on GOP Rep. To Supreme Court: If You Like Obamacare So Much, Why Don’t You Gay Marry It?…
  Victory lap!

President Obama: I Will Never Stop Cramming Obamacare Down America’s Throat

Sexy stoic president will give you tender-loving Obamacare.
Thursday, the Supreme Court ruled, YET AGAIN, that Obamacare is just fine and dandy and great, even if Congress did a really bad job of making all their subjects and verbs agree when they wrote the damn thing. So can we please stop talking about this now? One person who does not want to stop talking about it is President Obama, who decided to ride around the White House lawn on his victory steed, alternately shouting things like “Suck it so hard, haters!” and “I am the best at Presidenting!” and “Look, Michelle, no hands!” Read more on President Obama: I Will Never Stop Cramming Obamacare Down America’s Throat…
  Also pro-lifey

Texas Doesn’t Care If You Have Cancer In Your Ladyparts

It'll just screw you harder
Now that the “pro-life” Republicans of Texas have saved women from access to abortion, for their own safety, by shutting down almost all of the state’s clinics, they’re ready to solve the next problem: too much access to cancer screenings. Read more on Texas Doesn’t Care If You Have Cancer In Your Ladyparts…
  At least until he's "elected president" LOL

Rick Perry Wants To Free Americans From Tyranny Of Obamacare By Letting Them Keep Obamacare

Spit it out to make room for your foot, Rick Perry, or a dildo, whatever.
Former Texas governor and current “presidential candidate” Rick Perry is talking out of both sides of his butthole (each side featuring perfectly coiffed hair) when it comes to Obamacare. He’s agin’ it, of course, and it needs to be repealed. But he also doesn’t want people to lose their health insurance, if the Supreme Court rules, in King v. Burwell, that because of six little words and a technicality, the subsidies provided by the Affordable Care Act, which provide millions with health insurance, are unconstitutional. Wonder why he doesn’t want folks to lose their insurance, HUH. Maybe because if millions of people suddenly lose their coverage, they’ll blame it on Republicans, and people like Perry will REALLY never be president. Read more on Rick Perry Wants To Free Americans From Tyranny Of Obamacare By Letting Them Keep Obamacare…
  Teabagger Nice Time

Even This Cuddly Teabagger Dude Might Vote For Hillary, So He Can Keep His Beloved Obamacare

Obamacare yay, gay sprinkles in mah coffee BOO.
Tyrant Obama sure did set a mighty fine trap for the Republican Party, with their constant efforts to repeal Obamacare! With the full benefits of the Affordable Care Act starting to come to fruition in 2014, and even more this year, people around the country — even those who don tri-cornered hats and hold Gadsden Flags at Koch Bros.-funded tea party rallies — are starting to realize, well, goddamn, look at my general healthcare situation getting better! Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers learned this the hard way when her FaceSpace call for “Obamacare horror stories” was met with a whole lot of “my healthcare is cheaper!” and “my grandmother didn’t die!” and “these are my slut pills now!” Read more on Even This Cuddly Teabagger Dude Might Vote For Hillary, So He Can Keep His Beloved Obamacare…
  make yourself a nice bloody mary and sit with us

It’s Sunday Funday At The Wonkette, Let’s Reminisce About The Week That Was!

Hola, Wonkerados! How is your Easter Sunday going? Ours is very nice! Won’t you sit and have some internet brunch with us, so we can reminisce about all the lovely things that happened during the week? It wasn’t all Indiana and gays and religious freedom! (Er, actually a lot of it was, but other things also happened, according to our admittedly hazy memory.) Read more on It’s Sunday Funday At The Wonkette, Let’s Reminisce About The Week That Was!…
  Damn all those liberals who got paid to comment on the Congresslady's status

Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers Declares Victory Over Obamacare Fans, Goes Home

McMorris Rodgers' original graph, which proves that all Obamacares lead down a jagged path to cupcakes.
Last week, Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers (R-Washington) decided it might be a neat idea to stop playing Farmville for a second and update her FacePlace status, with that dumb looking graph above, just asking hey, everyone, how did Obamacare ruin your life and kill your grandmother? Of course, those stories are hard to come by, except for in Republican fever dreams that probably also include buttsechs. To everyone’s surprise (not really), what happened instead was that people got in the comments section and told all their nice stories about “I have insurance for the first time in my life!” and “Obamacare saved my Nana!” — all liberal lies of course. Well, McMorris Rodgers has an EXPLANATION for what happened. All the nice things people said were about parts of the bill that EVERYONE loves, even Republicans: Read more on Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers Declares Victory Over Obamacare Fans, Goes Home…
  my cheese castle for a caucus vote

Candidate Walker Touts Awesome Program That Governor Walker Wants To Cut

Step Up, ISIS
At last week’s Iowa Ag Summit, rumored presidential candidate and confirmed smarmy weathervane Scott Walker wowed Republicans with faux-sincerity and triangulated tales of the Heartland. Walker appealed to folks by trumpeting Wisconsin’s efforts to improve healthcare in remote areas. A true friend of Real America, Scott noted how he expanded medical treatment beyond home remedies such as Aunt Francine’s Giblet Poultice. Read more on Candidate Walker Touts Awesome Program That Governor Walker Wants To Cut…
  Obama's filling your grandma's doughnut hole right nice

Obamacare Death Panels Oklahoma Old People, By Giving Them So Much Money

Now Grandma gets to go to the Horseshoe, THANKS OBAMA.
U.S. Americans have been lately wondering why their Oklahoma Grandma has been sending them TWO crisp twenties for their birthdays these past few years. Is she sick? Has she reached the point where she can’t count moneys anymore? GOOD NEWS, it is not that, your Okie Mee-Maw is just fine! It turns out that, due to the Affordable Care Act, more popularly known as “Obamacare,” Grandma Rose has a bit more cash to throw around, stemming from Obamacare’s efforts to close the so-called “doughnut hole” in Medicare Part D, a dumb coverage gap that causes seniors to spend many extra dollars per year on prescriptions that they actually need. So far, though, since Black President death paneled all the Olds in 2010, Oklahoma grandmas (and grandpas, and grandsgenders, and also disabled people covered by Medicare who are not “grand” age) have saved $191 million on their prescription drugs, hurray! You know who is going to the race track this weekend? Yes, it is Grandma Rose and her 65,158 best friends: Read more on Obamacare Death Panels Oklahoma Old People, By Giving Them So Much Money…