Hawaii, we were under the impression your legislative types were generally not, on the whole, anti-gay nutbars since they crammed gay marriage down the throats of the state last December. We should never forget, though, that there will always be that one squeaky and super-bigoted wheel, and that dude will bitch and moan until he […]

So what should you do if your town has a homelessness problem? Should you (a) increase city spending on things like affordable housing; (b) form some public-private partnerships to increase job possibilities; or (c) pass a law barring the homeless from leaving their filthy homeless possessions around anywhere? Oh fuck yes of course it is […]

Yr Wonkette would just like to call on the conspiracy theorists of the world, especially the Birthers, to work a little bit on their communication skills. Case in point: this blog thing claiming that something is definitely wrong with a purported photograph of the open casket of Loretta Fuddy, the Hawaii state health director who […]

Are you part of the one-hundred-and-eleventy percent of America that is freezing right now? Have you barricaded yourself in your house and then set the house on fire, for warmth? Have you taken to wearing your pets as housecoats? Whose fault is that, hmmmmm? Is it global warming causing increasingly catastrophic weather? Is it a […]

What with all the other craziness that has gone on in Washington this fall, it only makes sense that Our Great Leader and Guiding Star of the Heavens Barack Obama would choose this moment to start quietly knocking off all the people involved in covering up the provenance of his obviously forged long-form birth certificate. […]

Hawaii News Now – KGMB and KHNL What the everloving fuck, Hawaii? You are so cool! You are HAWAII. Prezzy Bamz was born in you! You were multicultural before multiculturalism was Satan’s immigrant basket! Everybody is all mellow and high and gets along unless you are in Makaha or accidentally crash someone’s house party in […]

Well hello, GAYmerica. Because the frothy LGBT agenda is being smeared all over this great land, this little mommyblog has not been reporting on every state that legalizes gay marriage, which everyone knows is like poking G-d in the eye with your dick. However, some sorcerers bishops in a Chicago coven Church want to get […]

Welcome to a special Labor Day edition of picked-up pieces, a baggy collection of stories that were too stoopid to ignore altogether, but that we couldn’t quite manage a full post on. Or just didn’t wanna. At the top of the list, Tucker Carlson snoozing on the set of Fox & Friends, because there’s really […]

Ivy-league graduate and Harvard Law Review editor Ted Cruz is a startling example of how a Grade A Dumbass can become a U.S. Senator. From Texas, but it still counts. Apparently, despite attending Princeton for undergrad and Harvard for law school, this guy had no idea that being born in Canada makes one a Canadian […]

Well, dear Wonkers, it appears you have finally learned what the

Time has some EXCLUSIVE prom photos of a young and suavay B. Barry Bamz, so we will let you go on over there for your fapping, because EXCLUSIVE should mean something, dammit! But we will pick up this photo, because PLAYER BARRY totally hitting on his best friend’s girlfriend, WHUT? He is all you are […]

In Seattle yesterday, actor and permanent fixture of grandparents’ record collections Jim Nabors married Stan Cadwallader, his companion of 38 years, which means that the two have had a successful relationship that has lasted longer than any of Newt Gingrich’s marriages, or all of Donald Trump’s put together. The couple travelled from their home in […]

We now take a brief programming break from mourning the continuing state of affairs in Congress to mourning the continuing state of affairs on Fox News, where Bill O’Reilly has, startlingly, revealed that he might have some incorrect assumptions about American race relations. He has, bless his heart, moved on from Hispanic moochers and onto […]

Well, this is very sad. Apparently, History’s Greatest Monster Michelle Obama has neither shat upon the face of the smiling Baby Jesus by naming her Christmas trees “holiday African witchdoctor spear missiles” nor covered her Christmas trees in hypodermic needles and Stalin. How, then, is a hack of many talents to take great umbrage with […]

Sorry, guys, but GAME OVER. Illinois Congressman and paragon of personal responsibility Joe Walsh has handily defeated his opponent even with four weeks or whatever left to go. How did he do this? By holding up, during their debate, a photo of his opponent picking out a dress to wear at the Democratic National Convention, […]