Wednesday, March 11: In honor of the upcoming National Cherry Blossom festival, Washington Life magazine is throwing the annual Pink Tie Cocktail Party, which means not only will you be emasculated for wearing a pink tie, you will feel personally humiliated at your own Poorness when you find out that the tickets are $150. But! There will be cherry-themed food and drinks from all your favorite local restaurants. [National Cherry Blossom Festival] MORE »

The Alliance Française is providing an opportunity to be almost grotesquely multicultural tonight. Their latest Carte Blanche Happy Hour is being held at the Sixth & I Historic Synagogue, and in honor of its venue it’s also celebrating the Jewish holiday Purim. So in addition to the usual French food and DJ, there’s hamantashen and a Queen Esther costume contest. Oh, and they’re throwing in a French mime, because why not? MORE »