You know what the difference is between America’s elite, the 1 percenters and the fast-rising politicians, and slobs like you? Planning. Like, you, for instance, have no plans for the day, and are trying to relieve the ennui by reading a blog about dick jokes and politics, and maybe later you’ll try masturbating or something, […]

Here is your weekly Thursday Fun Post About Hitler! What has Hitler done now? Well, according to Science, Hitler “craved cocaine and cars,” injected himself with young bull semen so he could have mad coked-out bull sex with Eva Braun, and farted up a storm, maybe in Eva Braun’s face, because he was hilarious and […]

Current Republican Santa Ana City Councilman and recently resigned in disgrace Orange County executive manager for public works Carlos Bustamante is in so much trouble, you guys! After he made pretty much the whole office do sex on him in exchange for promotions, he had to resign his sweet $178,000 gig with the county, and […]

Hey fellas! Are you trying to get that special lady to let you and only you into her moistened drawers, but the only instruction you’ve got so far is from “Mystery” telling you to “neg” her (insult her to her face) or Joe Francis telling you to offer a trucker cap to show you her […]

Do you like to protest against the 1% and also rage against the machine and also find sex partners at the various activist actions? WATCH OUT, and not just for the usual reasons of venereal disease and having some dude never leave your couch. Undercover police are increasingly being given orders to have sexytime with […]

Biblehumper bozo barbie Rick Perry has been annoying everyone lately with his truly awful attempts to prove to the Jesus People contingent that he deserves to rule the country for his Tex-ass tuff talk on gays in the military, so it’s fitting and timely that openly gay former Texas legislator Glen Maxey (a Democrat, we […]

video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player So much for all those helpfully vague harassment accusations leveled against serial sex creep sociopath Herman Cain! Here is the disturbingly graphic money quote from Sharon Bialek, a former National Restaurant Association employee who alleges she went to Cain in 1997 for help getting a new job: “He suddenly reached […]

Unlikable jabbering punditurd Mark Halperin got a very important interview with soon-to-be presidential candidate and wingnut imbecile heartthrob Rick Perry. Mark Halperin named this mammoth journalistic achievement, “He Speaks,” which is also Jesus-talk for “God said something important.” Interesting information! Does Mark Halperin have something to “reveal?” Is Rick Perry God? Does He maybe have […]

Who wants to hear about boring old “debt ceiling” issues such as old people being pushed into landfills because of no more money? What America needs is a Way To Laugh Again, and it got that bouquet of clown farts Sunday night as Madame Ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi called for an official inquisition against Oregon’s best-loved […]

Thank you, Washington Post, our crappy lunch tasted better on the way back up. The killjoys in editorial have already changed this headline to read “Rick Perry has ‘huge’ opening as many in the GOP establishment remain uncommitted,” which does not matter because we now have our screen capture for the rest of eternity and […]

Eliot Spitzer is unemployed again, because ratings on his terrible CNN solo talk show “In the Arena” have repeatedly indicated that America is not interested in watching Spitzer sex himself on teevee. What about if Eliot Spitzer pays America to watch? Would she do it then? No, gross, just please go away. We have never […]

Have you heard the hot news about Anthony Weiner and the never-ending dick joke that is now the entire life of this once-promising congressman — or should we say dongressman? — and how he will go to “rehab” to stop loving the young womens on Twitter? Yes, the liberal pinup Democrat who loved to go […]

Oh sorry for this late update to the tawdry spectacle of yet another man who can’t keep it in his pants. Congressman Anthony Weiner’s wife is pregnant, presumably with his spawn, and also a bunch of Internet websites are posting pictures of his dong (released from its boxer-brief prison). This is all very gross! Can […]

When will middle-aged GOP Christian white working-class people embrace the billionaire Mormon elitist Mitt Romney? When teen-aged girls realize Mitt is “just like them,” and not until! That’s why Mittens went on the Today Show to let any teens who already dropped out of high school know that he loves “silly stuff” like the sexy […]

About 55 years ago, American kids who weren’t allowed to buy “race records” by the likes of Chuck Berry or Fats Domino were helpfully directed by white shopkeepers to safe, white versions of the popular songs by a very white pop singer named Pat Boone. He wasn’t some colored hoodlum with the greasy hair and […]