grifters

Hey kids! Is your grifting game going a little sideways lately? Do you need to learn from the big girls? Then let us head over to OpenSecrets.org and check on what Sarah Palin’s SarahPAC is up to lately, as reported to the tyrants of the FEC. In our latest edition of Sarah Palin Picked Your […]

We hope former Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell enjoyed the ten days off since his term ended since he now will spend the immediate future trying to avoid a stretch in the pokey. That’s because old Grifter Bob and his wife Maureen were indicted by a federal grand jury on 14 counts of corruption. Hey, at […]

Happy Veterans Day / Armistice Day / Kurt Vonnegut’s birthday! Perhaps you have the day off of your “work,” and are using your free time to trawl your Wonkette. (Don’t forget to trawl HappyNiceTimePeople while you’re at it, now with fewer computer STD’s!) Perhaps you never have “work” at all, because of how you are […]

It will not be a very happy Rosh Hashanah in the home of Jesse Jackson as his son, Jesse Jackson Jr., was sentenced today to two and a half years in a federal prison for the crime of being a grifter of nearly Sarah Palin-level griftiness.

The few times we have ever paid attention to Dave Weigel, he struck us as a reasonably intelligent guy even if we don’t agree with his politics. So maybe someone out there can tell us: did he hit his head on something recently? Take up smoking opium? Develop a brain cloud? Because there must be […]

Christine Daniel is a minister and doctor (although, not, to our knowledge, a realtor, dentist, or vampire hunter) who just wanted to help the world beat cancer! She did this by going on Trinity Broadcast Network and selling a mixture of suntan oil and beef flavoring. To people with cancer. As a cure. For cancer. […]

We are sorry, conservatives, that you are all mad at Sarah Palin for spending 95 percent of her SarahPAC muneez on grifty consultants and “shipping and handling” and “overhead.” We are sorry, because we are the ones who pointed this out, which means we will be subpoenaed to testify in the doubtless totally amicable divorce. […]

One thing we have learned in the past few years of grifter politics is that rich people are way way better at grifting than poor slobs like us. You are probably just too fucking lazy to figure out how to get someone to buy you $150,000 worth of clothes for a job you did not […]

There is not a reason in the world to click on the video above of fallen Wonkette hero “Joe” the “Plumber” flapping his gums at his election loss party, except to note his killer rags. Dude, you were running for Congress. You think the flannel might be a touch … less formal than the occasion […]

National Free Lunch expert Sarah Palin has apparently accepted an exciting spot as some food industry lecturer at this year’s “International Dairy Deli Bakery Association Seminar and Expo,” sure. Complimentary donuts. But according to the hot speaker lineup spotted by Wonkette baked-goods operative “Banana_bread,” Sarah Palin lost out for the top-billed spot to alleged racist […]

Herman Cain is back again with a new video in which an adorable bunny symbolizing adorable small business is catapulted into the air and blasted to pieces by some NRA sociopath with a rifle, as part of Herman Cain’s ongoing series of snuff films starring small, defenseless animals (remember when the goldfish was tortured, how […]

Didn’t you sort of feel like Herman Cain said he was just going out for a pack of smokes, and then we never heard from him again and somehow got stuck with his car note and a bunch of boring creepo ‘Washington insiders?’ Well, CAIN’S BACK, BABY. Just goes to show you can’t keep a […]

Rick Perry’s comprehensive new policy platform for “fixin’ shit” is just to slash Congress’ $174,000 annual paychecks in half and cut back on the time that Congress spends in Washington, as punishment for making everyone hate them. This is Rick Perry’s huge “solution” to everything according to his new campaign ad, an idea that has […]

The Democratic Party is still not entirely sure what to do with this “Occupy Wall Street” stuff beyond allowing for a few cautious statements from one or another “liberal” member of Congress let out of the pen for a few minutes to say something to the effect of “it’s possible people might be somewhat fed […]

Thanksgiving hasn’t even happened yet and look, here already is a giant plate of half-putrefied “leftovers” to add to the compost bin: mutant overgrown toad wart Roger Ailes nearly (OH GOD, WHY NEARLY) evicted yammering reject Sarah Palin from his evil teevee space beams in an enraged fit right after she “announced” she was quitting […]