Tag: greatest depression

HOORAY, WE’RE RICH AGAIN! RECESSION OVER … In Canada

Feeling a little fancy today? You should be! If you're Canadian, we mean .... Because the Bank of Canada has announced the Horrible Recession is over, done, finished, kaput, ├ętait finie. But only in Canada, and only for Canadians....

Senate Bailout Doesn’t Actually Save Collapsing Economy

Hey, you half-million people seeking unemployment checks last month: Did you not hear that Congress and Hank Paulson are going to Save the Economy? And what about you Wall Street analysts finally admitting, today, that the United States is...

Brave Senate Saves Massive Gov’t Spending Bill

There were many frayed nerves Monday -- about 777 frayed nerves, or more than $1 trillion in soiled panties -- when the loopy House of Representatives voted against a giant government spending bill to help homeless Wall Street executives...

Global Capitalism Fails, Ends

Well, shit. Fun while it lasted, right? For us, anyways -- the elites who had the MacBooks and iPhones and flat-screen teevees and cars and hot water and, uh, food. Pretty much sucked for the other 5 billion, but...

Liveblogging the Barack vs. Obama Mississippi Massacre, Part I

Good lord, people, who even knew we would be doing this, tonight?! Just think, drinking and watching some crap on the teevee and maybe just cold layin' down some blogs. Oh yeah right that is just the normal life...

Coward McCain Will (Maybe?) Show Up Tonight, So Here’s Your Debate Drinking Game!

Whew, that was close. Goofy old national joke John "Walnuts!" McCain had threatened to skip tonight's debate unless he, uh, solved the Financial Crisis. Luckily for us, the 500-year-old clown can't "keep his word" for more than a few...

Barney Frank & Harry Reid Will Kill John McCain

Barney Frank is ANGRY, again, and John McCain better stay away from the portly House Financial Services Committee chairman. He says they're all working with "serious Republicans" but that obviously means no McCain. Frank's doing a live press conference,...

HELP US, GEORGE W., YOU ARE OUR ONLY HOPE? Oh dear lord, George W. Bush will be rolled out in a moment to speak about the Depression, again. Liveblogging will occur.

Washington Mutual Collapses; McCain Destroys Bailout Deal

There are no more nights in politics or business -- only the endless horrible grind of collapse and fuckery, 24 hours a day, including this newest chapter in our latest, greatest depression: Washington Mutual has collapsed, and was closed...