Turns out Barack Obama is making some jobs for us, after all! Sure, none of those fancy Obama Administration positions really “trickled down” to you unemployed libtards with the Hope sticker on your MacBook, but that’s okay — the administration is now proposing all kinds of exciting foreign service civilian positions. Sexytime, right?! Romantic café dinners, wine-fueled fucking in the sweet spring grass of the Jardin du Luxembourg, getting high under Karlov Most in the summertime, etc. Well …. MORE »

Here, watch this, and maybe you too can someday see why it is funny to tag the AIG flogging liveblog with “bonus army.” Ugh. MORE »

• FUN RECESSION NEWS: A half-dozen AM-radio wingnuts have lost their shows/jobs in California, because nobody’s listening and there are no ads. [Fishbowl LA]

EVERYBODY’S RICH AGAIN! Following Jon Stewart’s ritual slaughter of shouty pig Jim Cramer last night, the American Stock Markets finished the week with a 10% gain, hooray, win, &c. And now the market is, uh, all the way back to, uh, right about where we were in late February. Rally! [Marketwatch]