great recession
With Nothing Else to Worry About, Congress Cuts Food Stamp Budget
Hey, remember when the economy went to hell and one in ten workers were out of a job and millions of Americans lost their homes? That was awful, but LUCKILY rich people have completely recovered from the Great Recession (and then some!), so Congress is now finally able to tackle the very pressing matter of cutting the [...]
Stocks Collapse Worldwide On News About Meg Whitman
Unloved corporate failure Meg Whitman was last seen insisting that she should be governor of California because goddammit, she paid $141 million to be governor of California. And now the former eBay executive has re-appeared on the public stage, with news that she will be hired to run the ruined tech company Hewlett Packard. The [...]
Just In Time For U.S. Default, U.S. Recession Gets Much Worse
While the Republicans try to force a default of the American Nation with such tactics as “scholarship grants are for communists,” the Democrats are engaged in an exciting game of catch-up. “Oh,” Obama might say, looking thoughtfully at his hands, “Pell Grants are communist? Well then, I offer a compromise of shutting down Medicare and [...]
As American Middle Class Vanishes, Advertisers Focus Only On Richest 10%
Here’s something with a plus and a minus: Most Americans will soon be free of endless advertising and marketing campaigns, because the advertising industry has decided the only money to be made is in marketing things to the last people with money, the richest 10%. The “minus,” in this case, is that only the richest [...]
Nation Needs To Replace 6,955,000 Pre-Recession Jobs; 38,000 Created Last Month
At the rate of last month’s dismal job creation, it will take more than 15 years for America to replace the 7 million jobs that vanished in this Great Recession. The awful new job numbers — just 38,000 in May when economists say the country needs at least 244,000 new jobs per month if the [...]
Nearly a Third of American Mortgages ‘Underwater’
The economic recovery continues to be a complete fiction, like the Harry Potter books but without all the fun sex magick. Unemployment is officially back to 9%, with real unemployment at 22%. Energy and food costs keep rising as jobless benefits run out and wages are stagnant for the lucky ducks who still earn a [...]
Wal-Mart Shoppers Now Completely Out of Money
Crap merchant Wal-Mart has watched shoppers flee its grim aisles in increasing numbers for the past two years — seven straight quarters of declining sales. So what happened to this glorious monument of American Exceptionalism in the late 20th Century found on the honky-tonk mini-mall edge of every Nowhere Town, USA? Why did working/lower/starving class [...]
Americans No Longer Driving As They Cannot Afford Gasoline
Good news for the environment or whatever: Americans can no longer afford gasoline, because it costs about eighty dollars to fill up, so they’ve all quit driving cars! With the per-gallon price at $3.76 nationwide — and much higher on the West Coast, gah — some of the people are even sort of considering not [...]
Fires Rage & Farms Dry Up Across the Oklahoma-Texas New Dust Bowl
A devilish hoax called Global Warming is wreaking havoc on the un-ironically named “Dust Bowl,” where the worst drought since the 1920s is turning cropfields to scorched earth while savage wildfires turn the remaining forests into, well, scorched trees. The rains never arrived during “rainy season” and now it’s only the second week of Spring [...]
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