He has apparently signed the papers necessary to run for governor of Virginia in 2009. And you people worried that there would be no more jokes in America after Obama got elected! Thanks to McAuliffe-watcher Ellie for this important info. [BNO News Twitter]

Hell, we don’t know: “A Republican source confirms that John McCain has chosen Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to be his running mate. Campaign officials, however, remain mum this morning.” One plane-tracking Wonkette reader notes that the plane that may have flown Palin into Ohio last night was classified as type “GLF.” HMMMMMMMM. UPDATE: CNN confirms that it’s Palin. [Chicago Tribune, FlightAware]

EXCLUSIVE MUST READ from Politico: “As Senator Barack Obama turns to the choice of his running mate, Virginia Gov. Tim Kaine has emerged as one of the campaign’s potential finalists, sources familiar with conversations in Richmond and in Chicago said.” Eh. MORE »

Dina Matos McGreevey is still divorcing ex-New Jersey governor Jim McGreevey, because he is a Gay American and she doesn’t like that, even though she reportedly liked getting fucked by Jim’s sexy staffer Teddy Pedersen, while Jim watched and worked up the enthusiasm to fuck Dina with his own penis, after they all enjoyed sexy dinners at (really) T.G.I. Friday’s, in New Jersey. Anyway, Dina still denies the swinging TGIF stuff, and she wants Jim to give her enough money for a helicopter and three houses. MORE »

Back in, uh, JULY, a 60-foot penis etching appeared on a hillside of the Idaho’s governor’s mansion after some scurrilous teenagers (teenagers!) “applied extra-strength weed killer” to the grass. Things move slowly in Idaho, and “officials said at the time it was too late in the growing season to attempt to remove the image.” Oh what the hell, let’s just keep quoting: “Snow hid the oversized phallus over the winter, but when it emerged again in the spring some neighbors had had enough.” So here’s what they did: “The area was recently replanted with grass seedlings and covered with straw. A previous attempt by landscapers to obliterate the image only enhanced it with a dark green outline, after which it was covered with a bright blue tarpaulin for several weeks.” [AP/Idaho Statesman]

This David Paterson guy is a real piece of work. First he admits that when his marriage hit a rough patch he dated other women, instead of engaging the services of a high-dollar prostitute like any normal politician. And now instead of vehemently denying he knows anything about drugs he says he did them once, in his impetuous youth! MORE »

Everybody knew 2008 would be a very historic year for various genders and races becoming president, but little did we expect that all of our “melting pot” dreams would come true so soon, and so sweetly. Americans can stand up and feel proud, for we have our first blind governor! MORE »

It is indeed a sad day in America when a “heterosexual” man can’t hang out all the time with his many gay friends at a local gay bar acting “very feminine” without somehow getting accused of gayness. And yet that is precisely the position gay Florida governor Charlie Crist confronts as one of the nation’s most rumor-dogged opponents of gay marriage. The owner of the Green Iguana bar in Tampa now says that back in the early 90s, when Crist had just begun his political career, the future governor frequented this very gay bar and felt right at home. MORE »

Remember what’s her name, from last night? The one who spoke after that guy you like so much, George W. Bush? This is what our commenter “Thomas” said during her “Democratic Response” to the SOTU: MORE »

If you’re a state employee somewhere that isn’t New Mexico, consider yourself lucky — at least you don’t have some tubby loser of a boss enslaving you! Said overseer is teh Messican candidate Bill Richardson, who is asking his employees to take some time off during the holidays to campaign for him in Iowa. No pressure though… unless you want to like, keep your job and stuff… Oops! I said nothing. MORE »

Cheesy, big-haired rocker Jon Bon Jovi is supposedly mulling a run for New Jersey Governor. According to Page Six, the Bon Jovi frontman has moved his family to SoHo in New York, but is keeping his Red bank, NJ to claim state residency should he choose to make a bid for governor of the Garden State. MORE »