GOP

When we woke up this morning, we felt a disturbing vibe that left us with a dread akin to the thought of motorboating Chris Christie’s moobs. We soon realized that this was not the fault of the sweet, god-fearing, kindhearted and ultra-loving GOP, but rather because we were drowning in a sea of hatred, spawned […]

The Republican Party of Chisago County, Minnesota, posted this awesome satirical image on its Facebook page for a few hours Wednesday, then removed it — and the entire Facebook page, for a while — before posting an apology, saying that the posting was “not representative of our party.” Aw, come on, guys, enough Republicans have […]

Cory Booker, welcome to the Senate. On a day better known for scary costumes, you are one good-looking piece of eye-candy that we are very excited to see more of! And you were sworn in by the only man in the Senate we would like to bone more harder, Old Handsome Joe Biden, playing his […]

You already know about the hilarious and timely GOP videos parodying Apple’s Mac vs. PC ads that are timely and also hilarious! But what you don’t know is that the ads on the Republican National Committee’s website aren’t the only scripts that were written. Our Wonkette Special Investigative Team has uncovered the lost, unproduced scripts […]

After a gloriously fulfilling celebratory circle-jerk for not ‘killing the hostage’ of the global economy, the Senate took a well-deserved two-week vacation. Unfortunately, tradition requires that they come back and find new ways to grab headlines without actually doing anything. While the Senate GOP would like nothing more than to get medieval on Ted Cruz’s […]

Here are some dumb GOP commercials “parodying” those Mac vs. PC commercials that used to make middle-aged white men so angry. Remember those? Are you a middle-aged white man? Then you definitely hated that smug Justing Long guy for sure, for showing you up as the sad pathetic guy in khakis that you totally are, […]

Buenos dias, Wonketeers. After weeks of pointless grandstanding by modern-day Dr. Suess El Senor Canadiano Ted Cruz, aren’t we all ready for Congress to, you know, do something positive rather than just tank fourth quarter economic output? Hey, how about that comprehensive immigration reform that the Senate was all positive about. Could be a good […]

We here at Wonket love… no, we luurrrvvveee hypocrisy. It feeds us, sustains us, amuses us, and gives us a reason for getting up every morning… that and whiskey. And there is no better source of hypocrisy than Sen. David Vitter (R-LA), who has once again taken a break from putting his ‘family values’ wenis […]

Eight minutes can be a really long time. It’s about the amount of time it takes light from the sun to travel to the earth. Or in more earthly terms, it’s twice as long as Gary’s never-gonna-happen fantasy about Piper Perabo. But if you are an addled, half-brained drooling Tea-jadist, then it is just the […]

You remember reading Calvin & Hobbes, the greatest comic ever written in the history of ever? Rambunctious little Calvin and his imaginary friend Hobbes would sometimes play Calvinball, a game where you make up the rules as you go along. Apparently, the GOP thought this was the greatest government blueprint since Green Eggs & Ham, […]

Someone spray painted “WWJD Healthcare For Everyone” on the side of the New Hampshire Republican Party office in Concord over the weekend. NHGOP Executive Director Matt Slater was aghast. In a statement released Monday, he said: “Our building was clearly vandalized by liberal political activists who disagree with our fiscally responsible values. Instead of trying […]

Shutdown day 11! Hope you have been getting your Government Shutdown Bonus Card stamped every day, because 12 shutdown days earns you one free voter repression in the swing state of your choice! (Wonkette is going with a minority college kid in North Carolina.) Well, yesterday saw President Obama meeting with top GOP lawmakers at […]

Let’s see here. We have a divided Congress, an approaching debt ceiling, and bitter partisanship. Congress suggests putting together a bi-cameral committee to work out a solution to deal with federal spending and the debt limit. Maybe, perhaps, this could work. Tell us more, The Hill: The House will vote as soon as Tuesday on […]

HuffPo reports that these buttons were for sale at a “VIP reception area” at a California Republican Party convention this weekend. The San Francisco Chronicle’s Carla Marinucci tweeted the photo and noted that the display had been removed at a later point. Keep working on that outreach to women, Republicans! And remember to dust off […]

Well, kids, we certainly have had fun mocking the Republicans for a series of stupid quotes about how Obamacare will rape your daughter,  or yelling at people doing their jobs, or 9/11, and we could go on and on … hell, we kinda did. And miraculously, the White House has managed to not brain-fart something […]