Tag: good morning america

Ted Cruz Will Protect Gays By Letting Christians Discriminate Against Them More

You know there is that thing called "gay Republicans"? Yeah, it's pretty weird to us too. It's like, "Oh you only vote that way because you're white and you have money and your tax cuts are more important to...

Donald Trump’s $100K Mar-A-Lago Memberships Open To Everyone, Even Blacks And Jews

Look, just because Donald Trump is the candidate for rank-and-file racist Republicans and distinguished Racist-Americans like former KKK leader David Duke does not mean Trump himself is a racist. Trump has disavowed that endorsement, and besides, Trump is the most least racist...
She's all philosophical 'n' stuff

Sarah Palin Waiting For God To Tell Her What To Quit Next

Sarah Palin's on a book tour for her Very Own Crappy Bible what she wroted herself, and Tuesday was her day to pitch it on ABC's Good Morning America, where host Robin Roberts asked the half-term quitter the question...
Klassy as fuck

Palins Scalp Witness To Their Epic Snowbilly Battle As First Sort Of Reported By Your Wonkette

Important updates are flying in left and right regarding the big Anchorage birthday party dust-up involving America’s favorite hillbilly family that doesn’t count a child named Honey Boo Boo among its ranks. (Which, when we think about it, is...
So glad we stayed for the credits to Guardians of the Galaxy

Cultural Icon Phil The Duck Is A Homophobe Just Like Jesus

Last year's Free Speach* martyr Phil "All Merchandise 50% Off" Robertson has him a book-shaped object out and is dutifully making the rounds of the morning news programs to try to gin up some interest in his thoughts. While...

What Is Nancy Grace Being A Douche About Today?

Perhaps when you first saw the terrible evidence piling up against Oscar Pistorius in the murder of his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp, you were saddened by the emotional abuse. Or maybe it was because she seemed wonderful: strong and nice...

Good Morning America’s Robin Roberts Comes Out, Enlists in War On Marriage

Man, have we mentioned what a fanfuckingtastic year it was to be gay in 'Merica? It was! It still is! Hell, we even gayed up Utah. And now we've managed to force another high-profile celebrity to enlist on the...

Ann Romney To Simper And Smirk And Make Love To Us All As Guest Host Of Good Morning America

Set the recorders on your infernal machines, America! Egg Romney is trying to seduce you! On Oct. 10, which is next Wednesday, she will show us all the charm and grace she has heretofore mislaid somehow (it was terribly...

Sarah Palin Sure She Will Totally Pwn Katie Couric By Co-Hosting Morning Yap Show

So, Katie Couric is hosting Good Morning America (zzzzzz) and NBC got all hilarious and tapped former halfterm governor and eighth-wit reptiloid Sarah Palin for some clever/stupid counterprogramming. It's the Thrilla in Wasilla! (A gig cohosting Today is what...

Christine O’Donnell Planning On Switching Parties In 2012

Hey you guys, Christine O'Donnell is still willing to set fire to some media oxygen! Good Morning America had her and failed CNN newsman D.L. Hughley on today, because what America loves is listening to two people who know...

Rand Paul Is An Endless Internet Comedy Machine

You know, OCCASIONALLY your Wednesday-Friday morning editor feels kind of bad about piling onto a particular politician, no matter how odious/loopy his or her views. I mean, they've gotten pretty far in life, so probably they're smarter than...

George Stephanopoulos Is Your New Diane Sawyer

Former Clintonite insider George Stephanopoulos will replace former Nixonite insider Diane Sawyer on ABC's important hard-hitting American morning newsmagazine Good Morning America. Stephanopoulos is notorious for the most groundbreaking journalistic coup of the 21st century: "twitterviewing" John McCain and...

WORLD NEWS ANCHOR CHARLIE GIBSON IS QUITTING. Someone at ABC will now go to the Good Morning America studio, find Diane Sawyer, and shuffle her down the hall to replace him. Sawyer can probably just stay seated in whatever...

Cindy McCain Fondly Recalls Her Baby-Poaching Days On ‘Good Morning America’

Michelle Obama did The View yesterday, so today sasspants Cindy McCain visited Good Morning America. We were too busy sleeping or something to actually watch this wee interview, but here is a recording of it! After the jump, an...

Micheeeeeelle!