Tag: goldman sachs

Trump Pisses On US Allies Like Russian Pee Hookers. Wonkagenda for Fri. May 26, 2017

Trump alienates allies, Ted Cruz has money problems, and FCC is REALLY trying to screw with you. Your morning news brief.

Steve Bannon Didn’t Call Jared Kushner A Total Cucking Jew, He Was Talking About GARY!

Steve Bannon and Jared Kushner are GETTING ALONG FINE, NOTHING TO SEE HERE.

Senate Stays Up All Night To Screw Obamacare! Wonkagenda For Thurs., Jan. 12, 2017

The Senate pulls an all nighter, Elaine Chao doesn't speak, and Trump keeps his business all in the family. Your morning news brief!

Elizabeth Warren And Pals Introduce Bill To F*ck Trump’s Rich Cabinet Right In The Ear

A clear message that Elizabeth Warren 'n' friends will be a HUGE pain in the ass for the Trump administration.
True fact: Personal grooming regimen strictly dictated by Andrew Breitbart himself

Steve Bannon Doesn’t Just Have A Black Friend, HE HAS TWO OF THEM!

He was being totally Not Racist when he said only landowners should be able to vote. HONEST!

You’ve Never Had A Day As Good As Hillary Clinton’s Friday

If you were too busy losing your entire mind over "grab them by the pussy" yesterday, you might have missed that Wikileaks published what they allege to be partial transcripts of Hillary's paid speeches to Goldman Sachs and other Wall Street firms. I'll...

Donald Trump Hires Breitbart Dude To Fix Campaign, So He Can Win EVEN MORE

Is Donald Trump's new strategy the same as his old strategy? KIND OF!
"hello, beautiful"

Wall Street Traders May Soon Have To Live On Burger King ‘Whopperitos.’ The Horror.

Guys, big banks just need a few more years to figure out how to add more loopholes to financial rule Esteemed Wall Street banks are on their knees asking the Fed for five more years to comply with the Volcker...

Ted Cruz Pulls Down Pants, Farts All Over Mike Pence’s Big Night

Ted Cruz's speech at the Republican National Convention really brought the room to life. Luckily for Cruz, no one was distributing torches and pitchforks.
we all did a business

Which Bank Is Just Going To Pay A Big Ol’ Meaningless Fine This Week?

It's your week in corporate malfeasance. Get out your pitchforks!

Classy Donald Trump Suggesting Ted Cruz’s Wife Is Dirty Girl With Dirty Secret

World famous terrific businessman and frontrunner for the Republican presidential nomination (LOL) Donald Trump took a break Tuesday night from saying shit-ass things about the Brussels attacks to defend a woman's honor. Specifically, he needed to defend the honor...
The way we were.

Ted Cruz Just Wondering How Many Horse Heads Donald Trump Deducts On His Taxes

Oh what fun we are having, now that we have reached the point in the primary where Mitt Romney wants to dig into everybody else's tax returns. If you'll remember, last week, Romney, who really really REALLY didn't want...
This is what Ted Cruz looks like when he begs for money.

Ted Cruz’s Mouth Writing Checks No Ass Can Cash

Uh oh, Ted Cruz is doing dirty tricks again! (No, he's not still saying Ben Carson died in an Iowa cornfield or whatever. He apologized for that at Saturday's debate.) Now the Cruz campaign is sending some yucky gross mailers...

Ted Cruz Outraged Obama Seized His Health Insurance, Except For How He Didn’t

You guys hear the woeful tale of Ted Cruz trying to obtain affordable healthcare for his family, in Tyrant Obama's Socialist America? No, not the one about when Cruz briefly considered -- shudder, gasp -- Obamacare, after giving up his sweet sweet golden...
What the PFOA

If DuPont Poisons Your Water And No One Sees, Is It Really A Public Health Crisis?

The state of our Union's corporate people is strong like a bull, soaring like an eagle, and full of trash like a raccoon. In fact, this was an especially strong week for corporate dirtbaggery. DuPont will leave all...
Killed him a Continuing Resolution when he was only three

Ted Cruz Hates Wall Street, Except When It Pays For His Senate Campaign

Canadian presidential candidate and half-melted wax Sam The Eagle replica Ted Cruz is in trouble this week after the New York Times revealed that his populist "I ran for Senate entirely on my own money" thing was bullcrap, as...