Tag Archives: god hates fags

  buh-bye

Fred Phelps Is In Heaven Now, Calling The Apostles Faggots

Wait, you are saying, how could the world’s most out-and-proud bigot, who purposely inflicted emotional pain on the innocent, be in HEAVEN? Wonket, this must be that “satire” or “snark” of which we’ve heard so much? Sorry dudes, but according to our junior high nuns, if you act according to your sincere beliefs, you are not a sinner, and you get to enjoy eternal bliss at the feet of the Father, whether you are Catholic, Hindoo, Godless atheist, or Fred Phelps. And if Fred Phelps did anything, it was act according to his sincere beliefs. Since our nuns — who showed us Romero, told us sex was a beautiful gift from a loving God, and were general all-around-communists who were right about everything — were obviously (like we just said) right about everything, what does that mean for the “Reverend” Fred Phelps’s enjoyment of eternal love? Let’s fagsplore. Read more on Fred Phelps Is In Heaven Now, Calling The Apostles Faggots…
  you can check out any time you like

Wait A Minute, Did You Know The Westboro Baptist Church Girls Are Super Pretty?

So today Buzzfeed is all “Blah blah blah these girls left the Westboro Baptist Church and are sort of vaguely sorry they hurt people’s feelings when they screamed God hates fags a million times per second and also Muslins and Amerikkka.” But did Buzzfeed miss its own scoop? Yes. (Well, also it missed this guy’s scoop.) And that scoop is that Megan Phelps-Roper and her sister Grace are totally beautiful. See that video? That is them, just cold bein’ stunning and pre-Raphaelite. Like, really pre-Raphaelite. Like, they should be washing their creamy breasts beside a sparkling stream, their shimmering hair unbound to their waists, because maidens. Like, AMERICA FUCK YEAH! Even our cults are full of the hottest chicks! Read more on Wait A Minute, Did You Know The Westboro Baptist Church Girls Are Super Pretty?…
  god hates democrats

Bikers Save Newtown Funerals From Left-Wing Cult ‘God Hates Fags’

Everybody go hug a biker today! Not only did they show up in Newtown to physically block the view of Newtown mourners from the God Hates Fags funeral parade, but they also apparently blocked the sight of “left-wing” protesters … “left-wing protesters” like God Hates Fags! Wait, what? Take it away, Internet’s Second Stupidest Man, the Gateway Pundit, in your tour de force “Conservative Bikers Turn Out to Protect Newtown Mourners from Left-Wing Westboro Cult”: Read more on Bikers Save Newtown Funerals From Left-Wing Cult ‘God Hates Fags’…
  together at last

Sad Unloved Rush Limbaugh Will Not Air Ad From Only Friend Westboro Baptist Church

You’d think a guy in Rush Limbaugh’s currently rather unenviable position would take all the help he can get — but apparently he is turning down sweet sweet ad $$$ just because it comes from the patriots of the God Hates Fags Brigade. Westboro spokesman Steve Drain told Raw Story that while his organization has had their differences with Limbaugh, they were on the same page when it came to labeling Georgetown University law student Sandra Fluke a slut. “Even a blind hog can get an acorn every once in a while,” Drain explained. “We’re not aligning ourselves with Rush Limbaugh because as we say on our website about him, he wouldn’t recognize Bible truths if it were a bottle of pills sitting on his desk.” Read more on Sad Unloved Rush Limbaugh Will Not Air Ad From Only Friend Westboro Baptist Church…
 

Crazy God People To Protest Heath Ledger’s Funeral

In case you haven’t been to a website recently, famous Australian actor Heath Ledger died Tuesday. Sucks to be him. As you may remember, Ledger played a homosexual, mute cowboy in the film Brokeback Mountain, which was groundbreaking because it depicted gay sex for the first time in world history. It seems that this *fictional* role, in which the *fictional* gay cowboy *fictionally* questioned God, has led a radical Baptist church in Kansas to protest his memorial service, which is not *fictional*. Politician Mike Huckabee is also a radical Baptist, so we’ll run with this. Read more on Crazy God People To Protest Heath Ledger’s Funeral…